Social distancing for couples

[harllee]

DH and I are in our late 60s and we both had a bad case of the flu last year (we had the flu vaccine but got sick anyway). It was awful. DH got it first and even though we isolated from each and we each had Tamiflu and wore masks, and I cleaned everything, etc we both got very sick. I was sick for at least 3 weeks and it took DH over a month to be able to function at all. The worst part was that we were unprepared--had not stocked up on food and supplies, had no coked food in the refrigerator, etc. We had to ask friends and neighbors to bring us food--they left it on the porch and ran. We are better prepared now--we have stocked up on food and supplies, and have easy to prepare meals. But if both of us get sick at the same time I am sure it will be awful and I am very concerned.

 

[donheff]

DH and I are in our late 60s and we both had a bad case of the flu last year (we had the flu vaccine but got sick anyway). It was awful. DH got it first and even though we isolated from each and we each had Tamiflu and wore masks, and I cleaned everything, etc we both got very sick. I was sick for at least 3 weeks and it took DH over a month to be able to function at all. The worst part was that we were unprepared--had not stocked up on food and supplies, had no coked food in the refrigerator, etc. We had to ask friends and neighbors to bring us food--they left it on the porch and ran. We are better prepared now--we have stocked up on food and supplies, and have easy to prepare meals. But if both of us get sick at the same time I am sure it will be awful and I am very concerned.

I’m curious if you got the flu vaccine. Not as a judgement, more as to whether it didn’t damp down the progression of the infection in your case.

 

[harllee]

I’m curious if you got the flu vaccine. Not as a judgement, more as to whether it didn’t damp down the progression of the infection in your case.

Yes as I said above we both had the flu vaccine, we were still very sick. And we both took Tamiflu as soon as diagnosed but it did not seem to help--in fact it made me sick on my stomach. DH lost his sense of smell, taste and hearing for a while. All eventually came back but he still has some hearing loss and ringing in his ears from the flu and is still under the care of an ent doctor so he has some permanent problems caused by the flu.

 

[Nemo2]

And we both took Tamiflu as soon as diagnosed but it did not seem to help--

To Tamiflu or Not to Tamiflu? | National Center for Health Research

On average patients who start taking Tamiflu within 48 hours of getting sick will recover one day faster than patients who do not take anything.............//............On the other hand, when Tamiflu was used to prevent the flu in people exposed to confirmed cases of flu, it was able to reduce their likelihood of getting sick by as much as 55%.

A preventative, not a cure, it seems.

 

[harllee]

Well, DH got sick on a Monday and was confirmed to have flu that day. That day both of us started Tamiflu. I was still well then but got sick with the flu 4 days later so it does not appear Tamiflu was preventative for me. Plus Tamiflu made me sick on my stomach and cost us $100 each under Medicare Part D.

 

[jjuneau]

Is she sick with the virus? If not, what is the problem. Is the virus somehow going to slip in the house and get one of you, but not the other? And then whoever is well will not care for the one who is ill? I don't get it.

 

[rk911]

that's exactly what happened with our friends. she is very sick with something...(no test) but he isn't...yet.

 

[harllee]

Is she sick with the virus? If not, what is the problem. Is the virus somehow going to slip in the house and get one of you, but not the other? And then whoever is well will not care for the one who is ill? I don't get it.

Not sure who you are asking the question of, but for me, the worst thing would be for both of us to be sick at the same time and not be able to care for each other. What I would hope is that if one got sick the other could remain well to care for the sick one--but it probably will not happen that way.

 

[ivinsfan]

Not sure who you are asking the question of, but for me, the worst thing would be for both of us to be sick at the same time and not be able to care for each other. What I would hope is that if one got sick the other could remain well to care for the sick one--but it probably will not happen that way.

I can tell how concerned you are about your situation. That horrible experience you had with the flu last year must be on your mind.

So a bit of good news, a classmate so late 60ish and his DW both tested positive without any indication they were not healthy. Both doing fine. Their state has started testing non-symptomatic people to check for herd immunity. They don't know when they would have been exposed.
They both have some health issues and so far so good.

For myself I try to remember most people come out the other side of this with no big problems. Not saying you shouldn't worry, but I think there are more people like my classmate out there then we know about.

Even in my state they want to ramp up testing but only for people with symptoms. They say they will be able to do 10K (at some point) but still they won't test regular people.

 

[harllee]

I can tell how concerned you are about your situation. That horrible experience you had with the flu last year must be on your mind.

So a bit of good news, a classmate so late 60ish and his DW both tested positive without any indication they were not healthy. Both doing fine. Their state has started testing non-symptomatic people to check for herd immunity. They don't know when they would have been exposed.
They both have some health issues and so far so good.

For myself I try to remember most people come out the other side of this with no big problems. Not saying you shouldn't worry, but I think there are more people like my classmate out there then we know about.

Even in my state they want to ramp up testing but only for people with symptoms. They say they will be able to do 10K (at some point) but still they won't test regular people.

invaninsfan, thanks for the uplifting news. Yes I think am extra stressed because of the terrible case of the flu DH and I had last year, plus the fact we are both in our late 60s and DH takes Humira which increases his risk. I am getting more stressed everyday as more people in my community gets sick (some of whom I know). I am trying to do things to keep the stress down--exercise, music, yoga, fun Tv, playing games but I am having trouble controlling my stress at this point. So thanks for your help.

 

[ivinsfan]

invaninsfan, thanks for the uplifting news. Yes I think am extra stressed because of the terrible case of the flu DH and I had last year, plus the fact we are both in our late 70s and DH takes Humira which increases his risk. I am getting more stressed everyday as more people in my community gets sick (some of whom I know). I am trying to do things to keep the stress down--exercise, music, yoga, fun Tv, playing games but I am having trouble controlling my stress at this point. So thanks for your help.

I worry too, my DH came out of one of his heart surgeries with a defibrillator and is now over 70. One thing is that it's planting time here and he is out prepping and planting corn..that feels normal. I'm doing yardwork on our 5 acre building site. that feels normal, so the last few days I have felt less stress.

But for those of us that can't do "normal" it's more of a struggle and sometimes seems overwhelming...