Favorite Phrases Your Dad/Mom Used on You.........

[FinanceDude]

Here's a few of my "favorites":

Compared to your latest decisions, that box of rocks over there is lookin' pretty smart right about now...........

Who kidnapped my son, and left me this creature from outer space?

Keep that up, and your name will be MUD!!

I hope you have kids that give you as big as headache as you give me...........

Just a few timeless quotes...........

Funny, when I was 17 I thought my old man was the stupidest man on earth, and now every year I look at him like he's Einstein...........

 

[Deetso]

Unfortunately- one quote sticks in my mind-

"if you want it-
you need it-
if you need it-
buy it.
You only live once and you cant take your money with you"

Sigh... I wish I was kidding. Im planning for the day I have to take care of him.

 

[HFWR]

Stop running around like a fart in a whirlwind...

I'll jerk a knot in your tail...

"Until I was eight years old, I thought my name was Jesus Christ." Bill Cosby

 

[brewer12345]

"I have had the meat!"

No idea what he thought it meant, but it was Dad's exclamation when he had had enough and was about to fly off the handle.

 

[mickeyd]

"Eat you beans. There are starving children in Armenia..."

I never knew where Armenia was, nor did I ever read about their plight in the local newspaper, yet every day the same worn-out warning about Armenian children!!

I suppose that we kids were supposed to be grateful for our full plates of great chow (we were) but...if we did not eat it, would Mom really have it sent to Armenia?

 

[73ss454]

When I would ask for something my Dad would say:

Close your eyes and what do you see. I'd say nothing and he'd say.
That's what your getting.

 

[Dawg52]

By my mom: "My aching back!"

Always used that if I screwed up or did something she didn't agree with. In fact she still says it.

 

[igsoy]

dad would both mutter and exclaim:

"Bunch of mental midgets around here..."

because he was the only one who knew the right way to do everything and we never did exactly as instructed because we could care less...

 

[Arif]

The one I heard most often went like this:
Me- Dad can I want to go to the fair
Dad- Do you have some fair money?

I eventually started washing cars, pulling weeds, cutting grass, etc so I could say "Why yes I do sir"

 

[Keim]

From my father-in-law:
You can't enlighten the unconscious.

Any idiot can pay full price!

 

[justin]

Mom - "Don't throw that away, it might be worth something someday"
alternatively - "Don't throw that away, it might be a collector's item someday"

 

[Moemg]

Mom _Wait till your father comes home !

Mom- You'd be crying with an ice cream cone in your hand ??

 

[lazygood4nothinbum]

externally, my mother was the eternal optimist, power of positive thinker extraordinaire. she'd say stuff like "fantastic!", "isn't this great!" and "that was the best meal, dessert, vacation, (______fill in the blank) i ever had!"

if we didn't have so many surviving, well, to be polite, traditionalists, i was going to put on mom's tombstone "that was the best life i ever had!"

 

[Donzo]

My Mom -- "count your blessings" - heard this alot and found it very annoying - still hear it alot....and have to agree.

My Dad "a bird in the hand...." he was right

Dad - "you are only as good as your last performance"....very megacorp...

Both Mom and Dad - "OK -- you don't have to buckle down and study more....you can make a living off the sweat on your brow" -- this one scared the cr*p out of me

When I was graduating from college I said- "man, next thing you know I'll be old"! My Mom said "consider the alternative"

Dad - if you are the BEST at ANYTHING you will be successful--I could always come up w/ some smart a$$ example of how that hypothysis was wrong!

 

[Khan]

Mom:
Were you brought up in a barn?

It's all a matter of whose tail is caught in the door.

(Response to: why did you do that?)
To make little boys ask questions.

(Response to: his parents let him...)
Call them up, we'll see if you can live there.

(Response to: if...)
If you had a square @ss you could make bricks.

I hope your children are just as rotten as you are.
(I didn't have any.)

Use it up.
Wear it out.
Make it do.
Do without.

Dad:
Merry Christmas!
(used year round as an expletive so as not to swear in front of us)

 

[Outtahere]

Wait till your father gets home

**** in one hand, want in the other ( when we would ask for something they didn't think we needed)

Your face is going to stick like that.

Uglier than a cart load of assholes. (moms favorite)

Of course the - don't do that you'll put your/someones eye out.

I told you not to do that, someone would get hurt (as we went crying to her)

Don't you know kids are starving in China (we offered to mail the leftovers)

I'm sure there are a LOT more I can't think of at the moment.

 

[kjrn]

Did I miss it?

If you don't have something nice to say -- don't say anything at all!

 

[Goonie]

Instead of writing them all out, I'll just suggest that you watch reruns of "All In The Family" and listen to Archie.......They modeled him after my Dad! So most of his phrases don't bear repeating in public places (or forums).

 

[kumquat]

Nobody else got my favourite (as I did something only a teenager can do) "You got your mother's brains, boy"

 

[bbbamI]

Mom...."Ask your father."

Dad....."Ask your mother."

 

[wmackey]

"It aint illegal, if ya don't get caught."

Turns out I'm the white sheep of the family

 

[kumquat]

My favourite came from my gradfather. He was a gruff old farmer and we kept our distance until I was about 13. One of the last things I remember him telling me, shortly before he died, and just after some salesperson showed up on he farm.

He said "if a man comes all the way out here and wants to shake your hand, oblige him. But if he is wearing a necktie, count your fingers before he leaves".

 

[ladelfina]

Can't remember any outstanding mom/dad phrases at the moment.

Grandma: "Keep your eye on the doughnut and not on the hole."
Grandpa: (when raining) "What!? Are ya gonna melt!?"
(when we wanted candy) "You're gonna get sugah diabeetiss!"

 

[scrinch]

If you don't stop crying, I'll give you a reason to cry!

(when offering candy) Take a lot....take two.

The job's not done until the tools are put away.

 

[Eagle43]

"Did you do your homework?" "Yes", I lied. How dare the school impose on my free time. But he asked almost every school day.

In his routine, Bill Cosby used to quote his parents: "I'll knock the black off of you." Also, "I brought you in this world, I can take you out."