At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, The US attorney general said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of mathinstruction.
Al-gebra is a fearsome cult, the attorney general said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'x' and'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."
Al-gebra is a fearsome cult, the attorney general said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'x' and'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."
Sorry had flashback of 9th grade.
