I spent years bailing out my daughter with few exceptions and limits. Now that I have retired, I had the heart-to-heart where I said in a very nice way "the gravy train is over". She was not happy, and after some careful thought told me that she wished I had never bailed her out and that she honestly believed it did her a disservice. Said it would have been better for her to figure it out on her own in retrospect rather than just suddenly being "cut off". She is far from cut off, but to her way of thinking I'm sure it feels that way. Wish I had known that years ago! My retirement coffer would have been much fuller.
You don't do kids of any age any favors by bailing them out. They don't learn anything and they come to depend on it when it happens repeatedly. She was my only child born very early in life so it was difficult for me to change the dynamic between us, but I did it anyway. In addition, she has 4 kids who also depended on me for lots of things. That has changed, too.
This is something that I am going to have to struggle with from now on because I didn't make her stand on her own two feet long ago. Somewhat in my own defense, let me say that there were circumstances beyond the norm. Her husband dumped her and 3 kids, lost the house, the vehicles, etc. She had always been a stay-at-home-mom and had no clue how to make a living. He decided he wanted a girl barely out of her teens instead of my daughter who was his childhood sweetheart so he moved in with this chick. He lost his high-paying job and everything else. Very sad. Anyway, regardless of the reason, I believe the biggest favor anyone can do is make them stand on their own two feet and learn to solve all of life's problems. Pulling out the checkbook too quickly to solve things just doesn't have a good ending based on my experience.
I don't mind hearing about her problems as long as there is no expectation that I am going to fix them. I can't. I can barely handle my own issues, and I owe it to myself to figure out the next 20-30 years of my life rather than continuing to prop up my adult child. I have given and given and given all my life. Now, it is time for me. Does that sound selfish? Probably. But honestly, I can see how I have not taught my daughter or grandchildren anything about living through tough times. I just took care of everything for them.
Have a talk with your daughter to set new boundaries. Then YOU need to follow your own rules and let her take care of herself or fail or fall or whatever happens. Offer advice when asked but otherwise let her be an adult.
Good luck because it is not easy but nothing worthwhile ever is.
TG