Who gets the money when you're gone?

[Ed_The_Gypsy]

DW will inherit. If there is anything left after that, I hope to set it up so our 2 kids get their inheritance at age 55 or 60, no sooner.
We do not have much now and I am concerned that we should have enough for LTC if needed.

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[pb4uski]

1) Who are you planning to leave your money to when you (and DW if applies) are gone? Kids or other close blood relatives? Friends or more distant relatives? Charities, faith based organizations, other?

2) Do you have a minimum target for the estate you plan to leave behind?

Based on the occasional net worth and SWR poles here, it seems like there is a reasonable possibility, even probability, that most here will leave a non-trivial estate. I'm curious as to who you feels is deserving of your estate when you are all done.

As for us, we have direct siblings and faith based organizations as future recipients. We don't have a minimum estate we are trying to leave. Our legacy fully participates in all the upside and downside. We'll spend it all if needed; there no way I'd w*rk even another day to do otherwise.

After some charitable bequests, the residual estate will go equally to our children. We will live our life as we want and they will get whatever happens to be leftover. I concede that it is more likely than not that the estate will be significant.

 

[Senator]

No kids here. If the DGF survives me, who is 12 years younger, it will be her. Otherwise it will likely be some young stripper yet to be named.

The more cash I have, the better looking she will likely be.

I am going to spend it, and have a lot of fun spending it.

 

[fritz]

We discuss this every now and then, but it always comes back to the straightforward (simple) approach. To each other, then split evenly between our two DDs when we're both gone. All accounts are already set up to do this automatically, avoiding probate.

They have no idea of our total net worth. Plans are in place to make them aware when one of us is gone, or when we get too old to risk handling our investments ourselves (probably won't realize it either - we are each other's safety net for this issue). They are both good with money and retirement investors as well due to our tutelage (but not to our levels due to irresponsible behavior by both son-in-laws).

We aren't thrilled with either son-in-law, but trust our daughters to do the right thing with what they will inherit. Our parents (both sides) did this for us and we figure it's the right thing to do with them. Let them decide what's best with passing along what they receive to their children. If either goes before we do - will have to adjust accordingly to see that fairness is applied for all (daughters then grandchildren is the tentative plan).

 

[bmcgonig]

My two siblings. But assuming that I outlive them my 3 nieces/3 godchildren. However, I'm sure I will at some stage make a decision on who might deserve it more and lean towards a subset of those. So they better be really nice to me!! But truly I would probably give most to whomever needs it most. Also, there's always someone in my life that could really use the money, either a friend or just an acquaintance that's needy. It would give me great pleasure to see that person more secure. So in my later years I would leave a portion to them.


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[hnzw_rui]

They have no idea of our total net worth. Plans are in place to make them aware when one of us is gone, or when we get too old to risk handling our investments ourselves (probably won't realize it either - we are each other's safety net for this issue). They are both good with money and retirement investors as well due to my tutelage (but not to our levels due to irresponsible behavior by both son-in-laws

We aren't thrilled with either son-in-law, but trust our daughters to do the right thing with what they will inherit. Our parents (both sides) did this for us and we figure it's the right thing to do with them. Let them decide how to pass what they receive to their children. If either dies before we do - will have to adjust accordingly to see that fairness is applied for all (daughters then grandchildren is the tentative plan).

Hopefully, the irresponsible sons-in-law don't divorce your daughters.

 

[Backpacker]

This has been a much discussed topic for my wife and I. We have 5 kids, 4 from my first marriage, and she has 1 from previous marriage. When we got married, youngest was 7 and oldest was 17. My DSS was 14. We've talked about a 5 way equal split, or 50 % to DSS and the other 50% split 4 ways. Neither one resonates with me. Latest thinking is to give DSS a cabin on a lake that we own, in addition to an equal 5 way split. Long story short, in answer to the OP, it's going to kids.

Does remind me of a great aunt that my uncle was convinced was going to leave her estate to him, but left it all to her church. Man was he surprised!

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[Sunset]

DW of course, but should I survive her, then I'll leave everything to the US gov't.

..... as by then it will be a negative amount

 

[marko]

We have no kids so when DW and I are both gone, the residue goes to my only brother and DW's eight nieces and nephews.

Half of them are good people with a good head on their shoulders. The other half are layabout losers. It'll be a good chunk of money for each of them.

They'll all get the same amount (brother gets 50% more plus my share of the family trust fund) but we recognize that the layabouts risk 'lottery winner syndrome'...but for once in their useless lives, they'll be on their own and have to figure it out.

 

[Turn_the_Page]

Some goes to the Perpetual Care program at Kansas State to take care of the pets, rest then goes into a scholarship fund at my university. We're childless and our nieces/nephews will have to fend for themselves.

 

[Golden sunsets]

I'll probably leave it all to DH's next wife.

Ha Ha

 

[Totoro]

Best.

Wife.

Ever.

 

[Redbugdave]

We have no kids. When we both go to the Happy Hunting Ground, the proceeds will go to the three non-political organizations we believe in and close friends. Blood family are all duds and scammers.

 

[FreeBear]

Half of them are good people with a good head on their shoulders. The other half are layabout losers. It'll be a good chunk of money for each of them.

Wow Marko, you've got a strong stomach! We'd have trouble leaving serious $$ to folks we don't really admire, but then again we don't have much close family left. I guess we consider our estate, if any is left, as somewhat of a scholarship fund!

 

[FreeBear]

Thanks everyone for participating. Quite interesting, but not so surprising. Most folks plan to leave their $$ to closer blood relatives, few plan to leave significant money to organizations/charities.

A wealthy friend ours knows tons of very wealthy folks, probably 2-digit million$. He mentioned that they don't give money outside of their family either and the same applies to their huge estates.

 

[Danmar]

If I had my druthers, we'd leave a boat-load to the kids. My daughter is in her late 30's and my son in his late 20's. They are both college educated, hard-working, productive individuals. She has her MBA, he has his engineering degree. I don't think it would go to their heads. Unfortunately, we don't have a boat load of money now, and with the market misbehaving, it's unlikely that we ever will. But I would if I could make my children's lives more comfortable if at all possible.

Similar to my thoughts. Only have the one daughter and plan to help her a lot when we are still alive. Bulk of estate will go to her and will allow her and her family a very nice retirement (probably 8 figures if I don't give it to her earlier). No estate or gift taxes in Canada, so it's easier to do this.
As we get older, I intend to bring daughter and SIL into our financial affairs more. They are both very responsible, intelligent, and qualified individuals. Eventually they may manage the portfolio even before we are gone.

 

[Midpack]

To each other first of course. Then...

No kids. Current will secures college education for all grandchildren (if they so choose on their own), and a nice chunk to executor for his trouble, the rest to 5 charities. Once the grandchildren are finished with their education (most are already too old to receive anything), executor and the rest to charities. No one knows the contents of our wills aside from DW and I though.

We still haven't established a trust, on the fence with no children and because we expect to relocate to another state soon (trust likely has to be redone then).

 

[kcowan]

All to DW but when gone, half to charity and half divided equally between two children.

We are having fun with giving larger stipends to charities now. We are also ramping up gifts directly to kids/grandkids each year.

And a large insurance policy to pay the capital gains on the individual stocks equity portfolio.

 

[poorcarver]

To each other of course. Then to both children who are very squared away and who both have really excellent spouses. We are both aware of what a difference some funds would have made over the years and are therefore being useful while we are still alive to enjoy the results. Example: home down payment help, summer camp for Grandchildren (none yet but in the plans), potential private education assistance (DS will be in DC all his life and might have to bail on local school, DD in NC again might have to bail on local schools).

Residue is expected to significant as we do not live up to our income although we enjoy anything and everything we want. Rather leave to children than outside institutions.

 

[Bestwifeever]

I was somewhat joking about leaving it all to DH's next wife. Right now it would go to our two kids should we both perish in a mountain climbing accident at exactly the same time. But....

Odds are good (for all of us here who are married) that one of us will survive the other. We don't know what they would do if the estate isn't locked up in a trust that cannot ever be changed. If iDH, who has very long-lived ancestors, survives the mountain climbing accident, he will very likely remarry as he is really personable and women like him, a lot. I just asked him about this scenario and if DS and DD would still inherit. He said of course they would and he wouldn't remarry (ha!) but there would be a prenup. I suggested he could be married to his next wife for twenty years or more, and what if she took care of him if he was ill, and what if she had a child or two of her own, who might need help. So I told him to give her the house and leave the Vanguard to our kids. He thought that was a good idea.

If we didn't have kids and we both perish at the mountain top at the same time, we would leave it all to our college where we met and still hold dear. I wouldn't want any of it to go to nieces or nephews or other family.

But in reality, I still think the next wife will be a factor and that's fine with me.

 

[aja8888]

I was somewhat joking about leaving it all to DH's next wife. Right now it would go to our two kids should we both perish in a mountain climbing accident at exactly the same time. But....

Odds are good (for all of us here who are married) that one of us will survive the other. We don't know what they would do if the estate isn't locked up in a trust that cannot ever be changed. If iDH, who has very long-lived ancestors, survives the mountain climbing accident, he will very likely remarry as he is really personable and women like him, a lot. I just asked him about this scenario and if DS and DD would still inherit. He said of course they would and he wouldn't remarry (ha!) but there would be a prenup. I suggested he could be married to his next wife for twenty years or more, and what if she took care of him if he was ill, and what if she had a child or two of her own, who might need help. So I told him to give her the house and leave the Vanguard to our kids. He thought that was a good idea.

If we didn't have kids and we both perish at the mountain top at the same time, we would leave it all to our college where we met and still hold dear. I wouldn't want any of it to go to nieces or nephews or other family.

But in reality, I still think the next wife will be a factor and that's fine with me.

Question I have is how are you so sure that your DH will remarry? I know I wouldn't again and I am "over 60". I suppose that topic could be a thread unto itself, but may end badly if started.

 

[Nemo2]

Question I have is how are you so sure that your DH will remarry? I know I wouldn't again and I am "over 60". I suppose that topic could be a thread unto itself, but may end badly if started.

"Dear," asked a wife. "What would you do if I died?"

"Why dear, I would be extremely upset," said the husband. "Why do you ask such a question?"

"Would you remarry?" persevered the wife.

"No, of course not, dear" said the husband.

"Don't you like being married?" asked the wife.

"Of course I do, dear" he said.

"Then why wouldn't you remarry?"

"All right," said the husband, "I'd remarry."

"You would?" said the wife, looking vaguely hurt.

"Yes," said the husband.

"Would you sleep with her in our bed?" asked the wife.

After a long pause. "Well, yes, I suppose I would," replied the husband.

"I see," said the wife indignantly. "And would you let her wear my old clothes?"

"I suppose, if she wanted to," said the husband.

"Really," said the wife icily. "And would you take down the pictures of me and replace them with pictures of her?"

"Yes. I think that would be the correct thing to do."

"Is that so?" said the wife, leaping to her feet. "And I suppose you'd let her play with my golf clubs, too!?"

"Of course not, dear," said the husband. "She's left-handed."

 

[FANOFJESUS]

I don't expect to have much to leave but it'll all go to the closest living relative(s). Right now my Mom is the beneficiary of all my accounts. If she passes it goes to my Dad then my Brother then I guess it'll be split between my surviving cousins. My hope is that I have no more than small 5-figures left when I die. If I have more than that then I worked more than I needed to.

Great point I view money as "canned work".

 

[Bestwifeever]

Question I have is how are you so sure that your DH will remarry? I know I wouldn't again and I am "over 60". I suppose that topic could be a thread unto itself, but may end badly if started.

That would be an interesting thread! Go ahead and start it .

He actually says he wouldn't but he is outoing and sociable and I think he would miss the companionship. How can you be so sure you wouldn't?

 

[Fishingmn]

$ goes to DW and then split between kids but maybe not equally (long story but 2 natural kids and one older adopted that has quit communicating with us to go be near birth mother). We would like to spend a lot on ourselves and kids and not leave a huge estate.

I've already told DW that I will be looking for replacement if she's gone and she should do the same. I'd want a companion. And a prenup.