Adjustment to Early Retirement

[texcurtis]

Although I was very committed to my work and enjoyed working with a lot of the people, I am shocked how much I do not miss work. Not at all, not a bit. It's been 7 months and I have not once wanted to go back to work.

The adjustment is not missing work, but crafting a new life filled with only things I love.


Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum

 

[MRG]

Took a while for me, over a year. Year two, wow what a joy this is!

 

[ElizabethT]

DH and I also read Ernie Zelinski's "The Joy of Not Working" about six months ahead of ER'ing, and it was probably the most significant thing we did in preparation. As happy as I was to resign and step away from the stress and misery that my job had begun to represent, I was almost as equally nervous about what I'd do with my time once I no longer had the majority of it accounted for. This book, with it's emphasis on living a life of quality, based on how you define that, was ever so helpful in creating a template for what our day-to-day ER lives might look like.

Although my DH seemed to transition immediately, I did not. I would describe my phases as follows: 1)Euphoria (the first two weeks), 2) Overwhelming sadness at the loss of my former self (about five days) 3) Confusion on where to go now (about one week), 4) Slowly building contentment (about two years) as I identified what activities had gave me a sense of excitement and aliveness, to, finally, 5) Deep joy and contentment as we successfully created a new life uniquely suited to us (the start of year three and forward)

Now, about five years in, life seems to have both slowed down and sped up, if that makes sense. We're learned to slow down and take things in as we go, but we're equally good going 100 mph at other times. The ying and the yang it would appear.

Someone here has a moniker that states that they recreate their retirement every five years. On a year to year basis I believe we now do the same. Our list of things we want to accomplish and places we want to go seems to simply get longer and longer!

 

[heyyou]

Retired from, without a plan of "to"

I retired to get away from my job, expecting anything to be better, much better. My first eight years of being workless became the best years of my life.

I spent several months looking into various recreation and volunteer activities until I found what suited me. My first day of retirement, I sat in a recliner and read an interesting book, cover to cover. I had no idea that was possible. I hadn't ever been that not busy in my life.

Wishing the best to others who are newly workless.

 

[Dash man]

I was able to adjust to retirement immediately, but unfortunately my dog has not. He still wakes me up at 5:00 a.m. everyday to feed him. Resistance is futile.

 

[Danmar]

Took me 2-3 years. There were important financial issues but these were not what you would have expected. Turns out I had plenty of money and started seeing myself as some rich guy. Never really did before retirement as I was working so hard accumulating equity/options,etc. When it came time to start spending this "stash" it was quite a bit more income than I spent before retirement. This required an attitude adjustment.
Also, I Defined myself as my job. This took quite a while to shake and come up with a new "me"
So for 2-3 years this new me was a bit of a jerk, I think. Hopefully not any more.
Actually not working was quite easy. Didn't miss it at all.

 

[marko]

Yep, marko. He's still w*rking. Hehh, hehhh, hehhh...

YES!!! heheheheheheh!!
As my signature says, "Living well is the best revenge"

 

[kcowan]

I put together a spreadsheet to convince myself that we could do it. I determined that we might have some lean years if the markets did not cooperate. We were OK with that because lean meant not going to Europe and not going to Mexico. DW kept working part time for two years and could have easily ramped up. I actively managed our portfolio during that time with some success, earning my keep.

So the transition was longer than most, probably completing the transition as a family in 2.5 years. Now, nine years after DW retired, we are just fine and the recent market meltdown has reinforced that.

 

[Donzo]

I was so incredibly happy! Being free of all the drama was GREAT!

My only adjustment was getting used to spending, not saving. I was pretty darn cheap the first 6 months or so. Now I rarely worry about $. I'm not buying new vehicles every day, but spend freely

I strongly recommend ER!

 

[hnzw_rui]

I put together a spreadsheet to convince myself that we could do it. I determined that we might have some lean years if the markets did not cooperate. We were OK with that because lean meant not going to Europe and not going to Mexico.

On the lean years, I probably would have still gone to Mexico, stayed there longer and lived like a king (well, a minor noble perhaps) on the same amount that would have just been barely enough to survive in the US.

 

[Dog]

I retired 8/1/2014 (18 months earlier than planned). My mother was requiring more help do to health issues, so this allowed me to take her to appointments and to research options for more care. I also had lots of plans for outdoor recreational fun. enrolled in and attended H&R tax classes for employment in the winter months (that weird need to still earn my way). Mom passed in on 8/31/14 and I was immediately engaged in taking care of her affairs and small estate and the time flew by. I didn't pursue the tax work because I was too busy and decided the time would be better spent with enjoyable activities (handling Moms estate provided me "purpose").
One year later, wrapping up the final details of the estate and looking back on a fun summer of hiking, climbing, traveling and gardening. I've relaxed significantly, love retirement and don't miss work at all. DH will join me next year. It will be interesting to see how he adapts.


Sent from my iPhone using Early Retirement Forum

 

[Which Roger]

I did all of my adjusting while I was still working. The more I adjusted, the greater the feeling that I was "dying inside" while sitting at my desk. As soon as the golden handcuffs were off, I got out, the dying feeling disappeared immediately, and I've never looked back.

 

[kcowan]

On the lean years, I probably would have still gone to Mexico, stayed there longer and lived like a king (well, a minor noble perhaps) on the same amount that would have just been barely enough to survive in the US.

Yes we have discovered that as well. When I did the spreadsheet, I was uninformed. Since then, we have found that spending 6 months in Mexico and 1 month in Europe has reduced our annual budget by over 30%. This is because
1) We live in Vancouver, and
2) We sublet our place in Vancouver for 5-6 months.

 

[W2R]

Took me 2-3 years. There were important financial issues but these were not what you would have expected. Turns out I had plenty of money and started seeing myself as some rich guy. Never really did before retirement as I was working so hard accumulating equity/options,etc. When it came time to start spending this "stash" it was quite a bit more income than I spent before retirement. This required an attitude adjustment.

With the surging market from 2009-2015, I think that even new retirees with lower incomes than yours have felt the same way, relatively speaking. Market conditions have seemed nearly miraculous to me as a 2009 retiree, and social security actually did materialize for me despite my prior doubts.

So, I bought my dream house and like the Jefferson's on that old TV series, [-]I'm movin' on up.[/-] I moved on up! Never thought I'd live such a nice and luxurious life in retirement. I'm working on the attitude adjustment but have a long way to go.

As for the psychological aspects of adjusting to retirement, like missing work and so on, that was automatic and probably fully in place before I got home after my last day at work. If someone doesn't want the freedom to control what he does with his time all day without being ordered around either by bosses or by the requirements of the job, he might have issues of this type.

 

[kcowan]

If someone doesn't want the freedom to control what he does with his time all day without being ordered around either by bosses or by the requirements of the job, he might have issues of this type.

Actually, I was the one giving orders. But surprisingly, it was just as easy to retire. In fact, I had to start taking orders from SWMBO, a sobering experience that turned out to be a good strategy.

She manages the household and I manage the money. So far, so good! Turns out she is good at spending and I am good at not spending.

But unlike you, we still live in our penthouse, but, like you, we bought our dream vacation home in Mexico. So life is good and we are probably spending close to you for our annual budget, thanks to Mexico.

(I just hope that Frank approves!)

 

[W2R]

If someone doesn't want the freedom to control what he does with his time all day without being ordered around either by bosses or by the requirements of the job, he might have issues of this type.

Actually, I was the one giving orders.

You probably didn't see the phrase that I put in bold just above. Even billionaires in charge of huge organizations are bossed around by what they perceive to be the requirements of the job.

(I just hope that Frank approves!)

He most definitely does! He suggested something like this in the first place, and thought this was a great opportunity for us.

 

[FreeBear]

The adjustment is not missing work, but crafting a new life filled with only things I love.

+1

Amen! We don't miss w*rk at all, but we are still learning to craft our new life. We fully expect this to be a lifelong adventure!

 

[FreeBear]

I did all of my adjusting while I was still working. The more I adjusted, the greater the feeling that I was "dying inside" while sitting at my desk. As soon as the golden handcuffs were off, I got out, the dying feeling disappeared immediately, and I've never looked back.

+1

Yep, I pretty much died at my desk, or more accurately, in meetings (aka group-gropes) and teleconferences over the final 2 yrs.

The pension was frozen years ago. It accelerated ER by 1-2 years, and didn't serve as much of any kind of handcuffs. It was always clear that mini-Mega's retention policy wasn't bent on retaining anyone. To the lifeboats, but first straighten out those deck chairs!

 

[Totoro]

Even billionaires in charge of huge organizations are bossed around by what they perceive to be the requirements of the job.

+alot on that.

Last week had a small conversation with a CEO of a rather big co dropping some hints about the downside of his job: shareholder, customers, employees all taking claims on him.

I'm more free than he is. Then again, he could walk away any time he chooses too. He's certainly FI.

 

[Kickernick]

Thanks for all of the great responses! My unofficial tally of everyone's experience is:

A Year or More: 30%
A Few Weeks or Months: 30%
Just A Day or Two: 40%

I had heard from a lot of people that it was a difficult transition that would take a lot of time, but clearly many of you were well prepared for it.

Among the folks that took longer - it sounds like there were often (not always) some extenuating difficulties that happened at the same time as your ER.

I'm guessing that ER enthusiasts would be much better prepared than the average bear, and I think that helps a lot.

 

[hnzw_rui]

The adjustment is not missing work, but crafting a new life filled with only things I love.

To be honest, the things I'd love to do if I had more free time, I already have. It's the FI part I'm still working on. The savings part isn't as fast as it could be as even if I LBYM, I still spend quite a bit on things I enjoy. I also decline overtime on occasion so I don't get burnt out.

 

[SDHiker]

Kickernick, we are in a similar situation. Four months out. We will both retire end of December. I have a feeling the "adjustment" for us will be going on for some time as we will first get our house ready to sell, sell it, move and rent about 1,000 miles away and see if we will buy there. This will definitely be a big adjustment as we have been in the same house since 1985. I don't expect us to settle down any time soon, but we are both very excited about the upcoming "adventure!" I will update in six months. Oh, on top of all that our first grandbaby is due January 4 in Portland, OR, so there is that as well.

 

[Kickernick]

Kickernick, we are in a similar situation. Four months out. We will both retire end of December. I have a feeling the "adjustment" for us will be going on for some time as we will first get our house ready to sell, sell it, move and rent about 1,000 miles away and see if we will buy there. This will definitely be a big adjustment as we have been in the same house since 1985. I don't expect us to settle down any time soon, but we are both very excited about the upcoming "adventure!" I will update in six months. Oh, on top of all that our first grandbaby is due January 4 in Portland, OR, so there is that as well.

Yes - moving is an adjustment all its own. Hopefully you are moving closer to where your new grandchild will be (or, somewhere cool they will want to visit?)


Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum

 

[SDHiker]

Yes - moving is an adjustment all its own. Hopefully you are moving closer to where your new grandchild will be (or, somewhere cool they will want to visit?)


Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum

Yes, we will be about 4 driving hours rather than a 2+ hour flight. Looking forward to it!

 

[Danmar]

With the surging market from 2009-2015, I think that even new retirees with lower incomes than yours have felt the same way, relatively speaking. Market conditions have seemed nearly miraculous to me as a 2009 retiree, and social security actually did materialize for me despite my prior doubts.

So, I bought my dream house and like the Jefferson's on that old TV series, [-]I'm movin' on up.[/-] I moved on up! Never thought I'd live such a nice and luxurious life in retirement. I'm working on the attitude adjustment but have a long way to go.

Good for you. It can be difficult for people to increase their lifestyle to match their new means. I retired in 2006. Finances looked outstanding until the bottom fell out in 2008. My net worth declined by about 70% before recovering. It was this period that cured me (mostly) of the "rich guy" attitude. Spending to match my means wasn't the challenge, rather determining what my means was, was problematic. At least until all my options were cashed out and my pension started. Was a real roller coaster both financially and emotionally.