Has anyone considered retiring to the town you grew up in?

[Forced to Retire]

I am sixty one (61) years old and when I graduated from college in 1979 I decided to move to a big metro area where there were lots of jobs for young people like me who were full of energy and drive. I wanted to make lots of money and work in a competitive organization. So I moved to "dog eat dog" Washington DC. Someone said: "if you want a friend in Washington DC, get a dog."

Well the last 37 years living in the greater DC area has been interesting. But after a few successes and some great years, the town has eaten me alive. The office politics just ate me alive. I made lots of enemies and just a few casual friends. I am now a old beaten down unemployed 61 year old man who looks and feels more like 70.

When I moved to DC my father warned me that the town would eat me alive. He was right. Maybe I should have stayed in Saint Cloud Minnesota and taken that job at the bank I was offered.

Is it too late? Can I retire to the town I grew up in and maybe should have stayed in in 1979? Can you go home again?

 

[Pbkmaine]

Do you have any friends there still?

 

[highlow65]

You can go anywhere you like, but don't expect things to change unless you do. Y.our words before said you are 300lbs and at 61 that starts to become crippling. You also stated you can be very quirky to say the least. I wouldn't expect a change of scenery to change much socially. Financially it can help a lot to go to a low cost of living area. The world is not going to change, you need to. Its difficult for a cranky older person to change but it can happen it just takes effort.

 

[RE2Boys]

I have returned to the town I grew up in after being away 35 years. But I also had a wife and two young boys.
Worse, I am living in the house where I spent my high school years.
Moved back to help care for elderly parent after retiring from career.
While I had some family in the area, I had lost touch with any old friends and have not reconnected.
However, with two young boys and through their activities, I now know a lot of folks here. Scout leader, soccer coach, treasurer of four different organizations, seasonal "dog days of winter" job, I keep busy.

 

[HFWR]

Move back to my hometown? Not on a bet...

 

[mpeirce]

I've considered it, but I doubt my DW would want to move there. It's different (and I'm sure your home town is different now too), but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

 

[Ronstar]

I live a couple of miles outside of the town I grew up in. I go into town almost every day. And I like it, although it has changed a lot.

OP - Move back to Minnesota and leave the rat race behind. Even though your home town will be different from when you left, you'll be glad you did.

 

[hesperus]

I never consider it at all anymore. My lifestyle has changed drastically from that time and place where I grew up, and that place (chicago) wouldn't support that lifestyle at all for me. I need mountains.

 

[NYEXPAT]

Having grown up in/around NYC (If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere) I quickly ran out of challenges. Moved to the most different place I could think of to start again and found out that old adage was spot on!

 

[Bamaman]

After 18 years away, we moved home for 6 years--prior to being transferred to Atlanta. And my family loved being back home.

My hometown is one of the upcoming and popular cities in the South, and most of my high school friends are still in the area. I'd be glad to move back there, however the cost of housing has shot up out of sight.

My company closed down Atlanta operations, and traffic was absolutely unbearable as I left town on Mondays and returned on Thursdays.

We moved to my parents' hometown where the cost of housing is extremely low and where we have a second house on the river 1/2 hour away. Our standard of living is very high and we aren't moving anywhere.

But any time you move "back home", you have to accept that it's not going to be like it was when you left. Friends come and go, and most of those that had a part in your upbringing are now gone.

 

[haha]

I moved to the Pacific Coast in the mid-60s. I once considered moving east again, but that was years ago and I cannot really stress enough how glad i am that I never headed back. I moved north gradually, from far western LA to central Seattle. In some ways I wish I had stayed in LA, but that is not really possible now for various reasons. IMO, LA is America at its best, but San Francisco and Seattle are pretty darn good.

Ha

 

[MRG]

Left home in '78 for opportunity. I found them 1200 miles away.

We could go home but no. Home was a good place to be from. I couldn't go back to the small minded people who I grew up with. Most have never been outside of 100 miles from there. Their world's very small. Maybe some folks could not me, not there.

When I recall home everything is frozen in the time frame we left. Buy a new home for 40k? When I see real estate listings it ain't so.

 

[RunningBum]

Don't do it because maybe you made a mistake in 1979. The past is the past, and all you can do is learn from what you've done right or wrong, and move forward.


If St Cloud works better than other places for you because of cost, familiarity, friends, family, or some other reason, go ahead. At least you know what you're getting into, vs. some other random low cost place, though don't count on things not having changed or your memory from 37 years ago being accurate.


I'd be making a list of places I might want to move to, read up on them at city-data.com, check rental & real estate prices, look at the job market, anything else important to me (such as running trails for my recreation), and plan a trip to the top choices and look at them from the perspective of moving there, not as a tourist. See how St Cloud stacks up to the others.

 

[ivinsfan]

I'm not sure if this is a serious question either, but whatever. I live about an hour south of St Cloud. The state of MN has a lot of senior friendly benefits and a lot of support for lower income seniors. St Cloud has an extremely highly rated hospital. A lot of the smaller towns outside of St Cloud have exceptionally low prices housing, especially for smaller, older homes that would be suitable for a single person.

Having said that, you can make lots of enemies anywhere, including the town you grew up in. The same with friends, you can make them anywhere, it just depends on the person.

 

[Persn]

Of course you can go home again, but here is a caveat: having grown up in Minnesota myself, in both urban and small town settings, I can tell you that while lots of Minnesotans are healthy, outdoorsy types there is a fairly prominent, unhealthy, drinking culture there that, because of the nasty winters is easy to fall into. And I think it is worse in rural areas and small towns. And even if you don't drink, staying indoors for months on end is also bad for your health. I would be hesitant to return there myself for this reason alone.

Its just a suggestion but it seems to me you have an opportunity to concentrate your efforts on getting healthy. Maybe you do need a new start somewhere other than DC Metro, but you should choose it based on where you can have a healthy lifestyle. It isn't all about weight, its about getting outside. If that's Minnesota, great! But it sounds to me from your other threads that you are already getting out and doing a lot of walking. That is a great start in and of itself. Just keep doing it and let it build; you may find that your unintended retirement was the best thing that could have happened to you.

 

[Souschef]

Move back to my hometown? Not on a bet...

I grew up in the northeast Bronx and left the day I graduated. I never looked back.

 

[RobbieB]

Hehe, I'm from Detroit!

I go back to see my buddies, but I ain't never gonna move back -

 

[Alan]

We are moving back to the town our children were born and where we were most happy, in North Yorkshire. We left the town 31 years ago and still have many friends and relatives there and in the area. The year after we retired we did a trial run and rented a house there for 7 months. We then spent the next 4 years doing extensive travel and getting our finances in order.

This year we have rented again for 6 months, just to be sure, and have decided for sure that this is the place we want to grow old.

 

[Nemo2]

I was born in London, England, in 1942.......I do not possess the vocabulary to express how much I wouldn't go back there.

 

[RioIndy]

Everyone's situation is different. But as for myself there are three things I am thankful for everyday when I wake up:

1: I am no longer back home in the tiny town I grew up in which was populated by trashy rednecks.
2: I am no longer poor and struggling
3: I am no longer in academics

So no I would never go back home. Only you can know if it might make sense for your situation. But from what you have said you are not fond of your current situation, in fact you dislike it quite a bit. And you did not dislike your home town, you may even have liked it but perhaps just found it a bit boring. I would certainly consider it based on that information.

 

[eta2020]

I have a vacation cottage in my hometown in Europe.

Spending there 4-6 weeks every Summer made me realize that it is different town now with different people.

I think I miss my youth more (which I experienced there) then my hometown . Living there is no longer possible for us.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

I spent almost 20 years in the Air Force "away from home" and was lucky in that my last assignment brought me home...that was in 2012. At first, I was excited to be back home, but that excitement quickly waned as I came to the realization that A LOT had changed since 1994. I knew of most of these changes on a smaller scale since I visited quite often (at LEAST every 6 months) but when I came back and was in-it full time...well, it wasn't as charming.

Of the friends that I kept in touch with over the years while I was not "home", there are only two that I see on a regular basis. All the others I saw more often when I visited...it's kinda odd like that. Initially, when many of those friends found out that I was moving back, I got all sorts of messages/emails/texts saying something like, "Great! We will get together soon!!!"...well, almost 4 years later, I haven't seen most of them.

Anyway, my Dad is the only thing keeping us here (he is almost 90 and I am his "go to" for just about anything) so when he is gone, we will leave and most likely not be back. I can't remember the saying exactly, or who said it, but nonetheless I think it rings true: "You Can Never Go Home."

 

[athena53]

I went back to Ohio... but my city was gone.

Seriously- I grew up in an area about an hour south of Cleveland. I went back for my 40th HS reunion and am looking forward to attending my 45th in a few weeks. HS was not a high point in my life but it's been like meeting new friends with whom I strangely have a lot in common.

That would be the only reason to go back. Most of my family migrated to the Carolinas years ago. I already live in a LCOL area. My only son lives 3 hours away now. I'm not going to Ohio unless I can take the 2-year old granddaughter with me and that ain't gonna happen.

You may have better reasons to move, starting with the lower COL. Still, you might want to rent first to test the waters. And DO work on your health. I'm still riding my bicycle and I'm on zero prescriptions. It's possible!

 

[fosterscik]

I grew up in Newcastle upon Tyne in England. I don't see any way I would return "home". Too many ties this side of the pond (children especially).

 

[CountryBoy]

As a matter of fact, this is just what I'm doing--in 18 days! I grew up in a small rural town on the PA-WVa border, after finishing school I moved to Pittsburgh in 1987 and have been here ever since. I left my job in Jan 2015 (sort of an 'ER experiment') but since then I've realized most of my friends were tied to my former workplace, so I began making visits back home to visit family a little more frequently. Then one weekend around 2 months ago, my sister commented on how nice it'd be if I just lived there instead of the city, what was holding me here--so we looked at a couple apartments for the heck of it, and the next thing I know I'm signing a lease for a place I move into on Sept 24.

Truth be told, I've been a little nervous about the move--but I have both a sister & brother there who never left, and this past Labor Day weekend I took down some furnishings & other odds n' ends I don't plan to be moving into my new (smaller) place, to the town's annual Yard Sale (an annual thing held every Sat before Labor Day) and was surprised to see some old friends I haven't seen (in person, just on FB) in many years. Made me feel better about what I'm doing.

I was also surprised someone bought my old microwave, coffee table & dinette set--made $275.00 which will go towards the U-Haul renter and my brother-in-law's son for helping me with the move in a couple weeks