Join Early Retirement Today
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Recent trip to CT for AL
Old 07-24-2011, 12:11 PM   #1
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
DFW_M5's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 4,982
Recent trip to CT for AL

DW has an 87 yo aunt and 86 yo uncle who live in Connecticut in a condo. Her aunt has been like a second mother and she has been investigating assisted living options for them over the past year as their ability to cope with the winters has been difficult. Additionally, her uncle has had myeloma for many years that was not causing any serious issues until earlier this year, when it started affecting his kidney function. We just got back from spending a week with them to help with chores around the condo, go with them to several Dr appointments, and take the next step in helping them transition into an assisted living facility. This has been a very difficult decision for them, as they are both very independent types and have stubborn streaks that causes procrastination about changes like this, but they have both come to the realization that this is the best thing for them at this point in life. We could see that once they made the decision to move forward with AL, it was like the weight of the world had been lifted from them.

I had never seen one of these assisted living facilities first hand, and I must say I was very pleasantly surprised at how nice they are. My frame of reference comes from having had a 95 yo grandmother that I visited in a nursing home, back in the 50s. The particular facility that we jointly selected has many amenities including: great dining room that serves breakfast, lunch and dinner with many menu choices (like eating out in a fancy resturant); library, craft room, gym, movie room with a different movie shown each night, a pub, a pool table room, a computer room; an ice cream parlor; an outdoor area with raised garden beds for growing flowers and vegetables, and a very nice walking trail around the complex. There is also a social director that invites in guest lecturers, puts togther bus trips and many other cool activities. The residents can select from good sized one and two bedroom unfurnished apartments and all residents carry beepers in case of emergency. The facility offers various levels of care ratcheting up to what you could get in a nursing home. It really seemed kind of like a country club and all of us were very pleasantly surprised at the quality of life such facilities can provide.

This past week has given me pause about the length that some retirements can have and also what to do when health starts failing. It was a good wake up call, as I for one have not dwelled enough on what the later years of our lives will look like and what we should be planning for. If one can afford one of these higher end facilities, it looks pretty darn nice to me.

DFW_M5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 07-24-2011, 01:52 PM   #2
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 8,616
My mom put herself on the list at an assisted living place near her. She passed on a couple of apartments, but then one she liked became available so she moved in. Sold her home a few weeks later.

My mom is stubborn and independent, but she also plans ahead. She wanted to be settled on her own terms with new friends BEFORE she absolutely needed to move.

LOL! is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2011, 02:17 PM   #3
Moderator Emeritus
Nords's Avatar
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Oahu
Posts: 26,617
Seniors of a certain age think of it as "independent living", but it's really social isolation while being held hostage to caring for real estate.

My Dad absolutely refused to give up his independence, until he had no choice. Then once he'd been in the care facility for a couple weeks he started nagging on us to hurry up and shut down his apartment so that he wasn't wasting money...

The book written on, "The Military Guide to Financial Independence and Retirement", on sale now! For more info see "About Me" in my profile.
I don't spend much time here anymore, so please send me a PM. Thanks.
Nords is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-24-2011, 02:55 PM   #4
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
DFW_M5's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2003
Posts: 4,982
Originally Posted by Nords View Post
My Dad absolutely refused to give up his independence, until he had no choice. Then once he'd been in the care facility for a couple weeks he started nagging on us to hurry up and shut down his apartment so that he wasn't wasting money...
DW's aunt an uncle also will hold on to their condo just in case the AL doesn't work out for them. The good thing with this facility is that all it takes is 30 days notice to move out and there is no one time big $ outlay to get in.
DFW_M5 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-25-2011, 07:12 PM   #5
Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 438
My grandfather always said he wished he had moved to the retirement apartment several years before he did - my grandmother was in a nursing home and he had outlived most of his friends, so he had few visitors at his house outside of younger family members.
rmark is offline   Reply With Quote

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
First Trip to London Lodell Travel Information 24 07-31-2011 12:40 PM
First RV trip of the year dm Travel Information 10 07-15-2011 12:51 PM


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:42 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.