Dead @ 52 :(

[nomo-aloha]

Hi folks....

Not looking for any sympathy here...there's plenty of the going around. I just feel compelled, for some strange reason, to start this thread.

A good friend of mine died here in Hawaii this week. An absolutely incredible guy that in 15 years, I never heard say a bad word about anyone.

He was my banker and made me look forward to stopping into his branch. I'd spend about 15 minutes a few times a week shooting the shiz with him. Rather repetitious was our greeting:

Me: "how's it going Greg"?
Greg: "I'm blessed____, I really am and how are you my friend"?

Mostly we talked boxing and football. Often he'd lecture me (in his very cool way) about how I need to do better with my money. More times than not he'd back off and play devil's avocate by saying; "but you sure have fun...dontcha'? One of these days you have to take me with you to vegas for a fight" Sporting his ever present patented smile. He knows I love to travel...(and spend). I really thought we'd one day see a fight together.

"One day I'm going to need some travel tips from you....as soon as the kids are out of school,_____(his wife) and I are going to travel around the world. we have a special fund set up and we're both taking a year off".

Greg was in absolutely great shape. If I know 1000 people here, his name would be near the bottom of the list of people I would expect to die so suddenly. I am still in shock.

Anyway....you know where I'm going with this. Greg did not see the world. He was dedicated to his job and his family and I think he had did a good job balancing the two. But he never lived his dream.

I need to figure out how to exit this thread now. I know you are all, for the most part, very decent people so again, please don't feel the need to give condolences and such. My only objective here is to fortify what you already know and that is....you NEVER know.

I don't wanna' sound like a cornball here but, please enjoy your (every) day.

Ciao, Greg. You are missed.

 

[Cut-Throat]

Yup, I also had a friend go at age 52. Last guy I would have picked to die.

Since retiring, life is going by so fast, that it constantly reminds me of how little time we have left.

Carpe Diem!

 

[JPatrick]

Very sorry about your friend nomo aloha.
The words in your signature really say it all....
"Skating away on the thin ice of a new day"

 

[Jarhead*]

Since retiring, life is going by so fast, that it constantly reminds me of how little time we have left.

Carpe Diem!

Cut: Have a suggestion for you. Quit taking those fly-fishing trips all over the world. (Guarantee if you follow my advice, time will slow down.)

My course has been unplayable for last week and a half. (Seems like a long, long, time).

Mentioned to my wife yesterday that I should give up golf and fly-fishing altogether. Might not extend my life, but it will damn sure feel like it.

 

[Nords]

Mentioned to my wife yesterday that I should give up golf and fly-fishing altogether.  Might not extend my life, but it will damn sure feel like it.

And she's thinking to herself "It'll feel like it to me, too..."

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

And she's thinking to herself "It'll feel like it to me, too..."

Maybe we've hit on the real reason my wife doesnt want to quit her job.

 

[Nords]

Maybe we've hit on the real reason my wife doesnt want to quit her job.

Let's see, free cooking, free laundry, free home cleaning & maintenance & repair, free childcare, free stud service...

... nope, she has no reason to retire.

Heck, she has no reason to cash her paychecks either!

 

[Andre1969]

I just got word today that one of my co-workers, who's 48, just had a stroke. Now honestly this guy never was the healthiest in the world, and lived a very stressful life, but it's really giving me a wakeup call on my life. Heck, he had just turned 40 when I first started working with him, and now I'm going to be 36 in less than a month, so I don't feel like I'm that far behind him.

Also just found out that another guy in this building, who's 58, has cancer. And my uncle, who's 53, might need a kidney transplant. Again. Damn. When it rains it pours!

I really am starting to re-think my attitude about just working my butt off for the next 5-10 years, trying to save everything, and then ditching out of the workforce. Maybe I need to start learning to enjoy TODAY a little more, because we really don't know what tomorrow will bring.

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Yep, both guys in the adjacent cubicles within a couple of years of my retirement. Both from cancer. One younger, one older. Neither saw it coming, had less than a year after getting the bad news. One had just finally retired after a failed ER attempt. Real nice guy.

 

[retire@40]

I really am starting to re-think my attitude about just working my butt off for the next 5-10 years, trying to save everything, and then ditching out of the workforce.  Maybe I need to start learning to enjoy TODAY a little more, because we really don't know what tomorrow will bring.

Stuff like that got me into the semi-retirement mode. It's not worth "wasting" a solid day of your life to make money. You can never get that day back for yourself.

When crap like that started happening to me, it was a wakeup call. I figured I wasted enough solid days to build my reserve. I tapped the brakes and now spend much more time enjoying life day by day, and much less time working my life away.

 

[Andre1969]

I think one thing I'm going to force myself to do is take at least one day off every two weeks, just to have some "me" time. Time to just chill out around the house, run errands at a leisurely pace, or just take a day trip to the mountains, beach, or whatever. I've got enough time in with the company that I accrue something like 7.69 hours per pay period anyway, so you might as well say I get one day per pay period.

Thankfully the really rough years of working one job, and then 25-30 hours per week at another job, are far behind me. But I'm really getting to the point that I just want to be totally free from work, completely. Kind of like that line towards the end of "Logan's Run"..."you can be Free!!! FREE!!!! And grow Ooooold!"

 

[kaudrey]

nomo - sorry about your friend.

Last year, a friend of mine died of Leukemia after battling it for 9 months. It was a rare form that was very agressive. He was 42. (I'm 37).

At his funeral, 100s of friends and family showed up, and talked about how much he embraced life. He traveled around the world, played numerous sports, had lots of hobbies. Basically, he worked hard, and then enjoyed the fruits of that hard work. He didn't wait until he retired; he found the time when he was young.

Although I have always been the "work hard, play hard" type, I vowed then that I would make a more conscious effort to enjoy life now, even as I keep my goal of FIRE intact.

It just makes you think...

Karen
(who is off to Costa Rica in 17 days)

 

[Nords]

(who is off to Costa Rica in 17 days)

Karen, you're aware that Costa Rica is considered a surfer's paradise?

It's a little more crowded than it used to be, but I sure hope you get a chance to check it out and report back.

http://centralamerica.com/cr/surf/surfmap.htm

 

[SteveR]

It hits home when the person is known to you or close to you. Dying before retirement is a wake up call...dying soon after retirement is a crime. I know several co-workers that had to retire so they could take care of health issues and none of them are still alive.

We all know people that died shortly after they retired. Their deaths are reminders that life is short and tomorrow is not promised to any of us.

Get out as soon as you can. Learn to live your life without work being the reason you get up each day. Do what makes you happy and if you don't know what that is....go find it. Each day is a gift and each sunset a reminder that you survived it.

Save your money, get your s@it together and make a plan to get out of your job and into your life. Nobody will do it for you and if you die before you retire few will care you never had a chance to enjoy your life beyond work.

Sorry about the tone of this but I lost a close friend recently so I am a little morose.

 

[Lusitan]

Sorry about your friend, nomo.

But thanks for the reminder. Sometimes I get so caught up in the daily grind, and all my planning for getting out of the rat race, that I forget to look for every opportunity to enjoy something about each day. Stuff like this keeps us grounded in reality.

 

[kaudrey]

Nords - yes, I know Costa Rica is a surfing mecca. I have never surfed, but we do plan to spend a few days on the Pacific Coast, so we may give it a try.

We're going to go white water rafting on the Pacuare, hike and do the zip lines and hot springs at Arenal, and then hit the beach. I think. We don't actually have any reservations anywhere, just flights and a rental car.

I'm usually as anal about planning trips as I am about watching my finances, but my BF wants to "wing it", so I thought I'd try something new and not plan...

 

[ebisky]

Not sure if you guys have seen this, but it is pretty cool:

http://www.theinterviewwithgod.com/

Lifts the spirits.

-E

 

[Retire Soon]

Nomo,

Sorry to hear about your friend.  When something like this happens it makes one realize just how precious life really is.  It's easy  to forget that we're only one heart beat away from death.  A sudden passing  is a shocking reminder  that we should live each day as if it is our last.  We never  know what the future has in store for us.


Retire Soon

 

[Calgary_Girl]

When something like this happens it makes one realize just how precious life really is.  It's easy  to forget that we're only one heart beat away from death.  A sudden passing  is a shocking reminder  that we should live each day as if it is our last.  We never  know what the future has in store for us.

Very true. My cousin's husband was killed in a car accident 10 years ago at the age of 44. He had his own company and spent 12 hour days at the office with plans to retire by the time he was 46. He had everything going for him and it was taken away in a split second.

 

[KB]

One of my former co-workers died in December of cancer. He was 48.

His wife had a stroke when their last child was born, and she suffered brain damage. He took care of a baby, toddler and an invalid wife.....His daughters are now about 22 and 25 and are taking over the care of their mom.

He never had any time away from his responsibilities; didn't think he would retire until 65..if then.
When I left work, I told him...you never know what will happen......So true.

 

[Dawg52]

One year ago this week my brother died of cancer. I literally think about him  everyday. He was 56. We all know cancer or some other tragic event can happen to any of us but it doesn't really sink in until a loved one or friend is taken away.

This time next year I will be retiring. I want to retire early enough so that I can enjoy traveling and doing other things that I have neglected over the years. March 31, 2007 can't get here soon enough! 

 

[Outtahere]

Yesterday my dh attended the memorial of an old friends wife. Retired Wed March 15th, laid down to take a nap Sat March 18th, never woke up, she was 59. No warning at all.

Dh wants me to retire.

 

[SteveR]

Yesterday my dh attended the memorial of an old friends wife.  Retired Wed March 15th, laid down to take a nap Sat March 18th, never woke up, she was 59.   No warning at all. 

Dh wants me to retire.

It sucks. My wife retired after 34 very tough years and died suddenly only 78 months into it. She was having a great time and was finally enjoying her life. We had no idea it would end so fast. She was 57.

Get out as soon as you can do so financially. This is not something you should dwell on but it is something everyone should keep an open mind about. I can't tell you the number of widows I know that lost a husband to a sudden heart attack before they were 50. Their husbands were mostly in good health and no history of heart disease. Add to that car accidents, industrial accidents, sudden death due to disease or getting a terminal illness. You just don't know when your number is coming up.

I am not suggesting everyone drop out of their jobs and throw caution to the wind so they can spend every minute with their SO. What I am saying is to do what you can today and tomorrow and the next day to spend more Quality time with your SO. Tell them you love them as often as you can. Show them you love them in little ways. Don't put off doing the little stuff to show them how much you care. The key for me is if my DW were to die tomorrow, what would I regret not doing more of with her? What could I do more or better for her? It is not about taking around the world cruises or buying fancy cars or jewelry; it is about share your self with the time you both have left.

 

[Cut-Throat]

I am not suggesting everyone drop out of their jobs and throw caution to the wind so they can spend every minute with their SO. What I am saying is to do what you can today and tomorrow and the next day to spend more Quality time with your SO. Tell them you love them as often as you can. Show them you love them in little ways. Don't put off doing the little stuff to show them how much you care. The key for me is if my DW were to die tomorrow, what would I regret not doing more of with her? What could I do more or better for her? It is not about taking around the world cruises or buying fancy cars or jewelry; it is about share your self with the time you both have left.

Very well said! You obviously know what you're talking about and have seen the light.

 

[Nords]

I can't tell you the number of widows I know that lost a husband to a sudden heart attack before they were 50.  Their husbands were mostly in good health and no history of heart disease.

What am I missing here? Were they subsequently found to have signs of heart disease that had been misinterpreted or even ignored? Did they have any risk factors? Or did a heart attack come literally out of nowhere?

I've read about women's hormone imbalances that lead to cardiac instability. I've read about undiagnosed heart murmers that don't show up until you're mountain biking. But I'd sure like to know if there's something about guy's heart attacks that's gonna try to sneak up on me.