Downside of retirement

[FIREmenow]

I was in NC when that become law. The reasoning behind it was to discourage heavy drinking in a short amount of time to take advantage of temporary lower prices. Not saying that I agree or disagree, just giving their rationale. They can have all day specials, but not shorter than that.

Now they usually have lower prices on food (appetizers) during that same happy hour, so now we cram all that in a short amount of time and get fat instead......

 

[Danmar]

What are your experiences regarding getting enough social interaction during retirement?

My DW and I are extroverts so social interaction is quite important for us in retirement. We have separate groups of friends at all all homes. This was a conscious effort on our part and has paid off. We have met several great people via my not for profit board in Alberta. Have met super people on our biking trips. Most of our circle of friends in Arizona were met this way or through our fitness club there. Can honestly say we have more compatible friends now than before retirement. Takes a bit of follow up sometimes, but it has been well worth working on this. We find Americans particularly friendly.

 

[David1961]

From the article:
You don’t get to follow the default script imposed by society because financial freedom obliterates the script and leaves a void in its place.”

Personally, I consider this a freedom more than a void.

 

[Amethyst]

I don't understand your statement. I have experienced a great deal of trauma in my life. Some things I cannot bear to think about, even many years later. Yet previous suffering certainly doesn't make the notion of "downsizing" one whit more appealing.

I have gathered that some people anticipate smaller quarters with glee; I would not be among them. Worked too hard and gave up too much in my 20's just to escape apartments.

I just read the article and he describes downsizing out of the family home as traumatic. Obviously he never has had any real trauma in his life.

 

[NW-Bound]

Yes, I understood the rational, just think it is still ridiculous. In Ontario the provincial govt controls all liquor sales and used to have all kinds of rules, like no booze on Sundays, no sales, etc. Eventually they figured out it was a loosing proposition.

By the way generally speaking liquor, wine, and beer are much cheaper in the US than Canada. Not sure if you have more drunks? Don't think so.

Not every state is like AZ. When traveling in the US, I often find it annoying having to find a liquor store, even in a western state like Montana, while in AZ any grocery market has what I want.

We used to not allow alcohol sales on Sunday before noon, but that law was dropped a few years ago. There's also no restriction on election days. So, drunks can now go to church and into voting booths.

 

[Amethyst]

Nearly ten years out of the daily grind, realize that w*rk defeinitely and rudely interfered with enjoying life and hobbies. I have yet to find a downside to retirement, with the exception that I know it will end, and not ny going back to w*rk.

Well said. Going to work, I always felt like I was tearing myself away from the things that really mattered to me.

While I enjoy my part-time gig much more, I had a flashback today to the Bad Side of Work. "Protocol." I loathe it so.

Here's the story: Because I'm part-time, my desk chair is always missing when I come in for my work days. People take unoccupied chairs into conference rooms, and then, like the cat who opens the bathroom door but won't close it afterward, they "forget" to return my chair. So I just go into the conference room and grab the nicest chair I see. Nothing is ever said by anyone.

So Monday, I used a beautiful high-backed leather chair that happened to be in the CR. I didn't expect to see it at my desk the next day, and it wasn't. No biggie; I just found another chair. But three people in a row stopped by my desk to inform me that the leather chair I had used on Monday was part of an "Executive Furniture Set," and had been taken away.

Through retirement, I had forgotten all about the notion of special chairs which only certain people can use.

Amethyst

 

[UnrealizedPotential]

I'm an introvert so the social aspects when I was working isn't an issue for me. I do feel like time has gone by amazingly fast since I quit work six months ago. My plan is working very well so far. But, I work hard at it. But it 's not physical work but mental work I rather enjoy. I took a different path than most here to get where I needed to be. There are many paths to a destination. I took the road less traveled. I have always seen things differently than others. I respect the opinions of others. That's why I read the forum. A downside to all this? Time goes by amazingly fast.

 

[misshathaway]

So Monday, I used a beautiful high-backed leather chair that happened to be in the CR. I didn't expect to see it at my desk the next day, and it wasn't. No biggie; I just found another chair. But three people in a row stopped by my desk to inform me that the leather chair I had used on Monday was part of an "Executive Furniture Set," and had been taken away.

Through retirement, I had forgotten all about the notion of special chairs which only certain people can use.

Amethyst

Laughing. I haven't thought about this in years, but at one place I worked, we had stock red rolling, back and height adjustable desk chairs. Then they got a new supply of exactly the same chair, except the new ones were blue. Every night there were after-hours exchanges of red for blue, and every morning there were outraged "theft" victims.

 

[NW-Bound]

... I do feel like time has gone by amazingly fast since I quit work six months ago

...I read the forum. A downside to all this? Time goes by amazingly fast.

Are you explaining the reason for your screen name?

 

[Eyesman]

That article actually resonated with me. It brought up certain points that I may not have considered.

I was probably in the position to FIRE about 4 years ago, but I am still working. I am still saving a good percentage of my income (~50%), but our household operates without a budget. We don't restrict our spending, and we have full freedom in terms of buying or spending on whatever we want. Our biggest expenditure is probably on travel. We go on 3-4 international trips a year, and fly business class, go on private tours, etc, with little regard to cost. Please understand, I'm not posting this to brag, but to give you an indication on the mindset I have when it comes to spending. As long as I'm still saving a good percentage of my income, then it's on and I don't restrict our spending in any way. If I FIREd, we would have to work within a budget. That's not really a bad thing, and it wouldn't be a big deal, but it's just different.

I am still working not because I have to, or because of the money, but I still really love my job. I get make a big difference and contribute to people, while working with some amazing and fun people. There are parts of the job that can get annoying, but if I were to guess, there may be 10 days in a year when I ponder, "is this still worth it?" So far, the answer has been yes so I keep plugging along.

 

[UnrealizedPotential]

Are you explaining the reason for your screen name?

Only if you will give the forum a photo of yourself

 

[calmloki]

...
His post is simply saying that early retirement is not nirvana. Life still goes on. You get older, your friends and family get older. If you were prone to worry before ER, you will still worry once you ER. More importantly, if you ER without some goal or purpose, whatever that is, you will likely have an adjustment period. If you were not happy before ER, you may not be happy after.

I applaud his honesty. I've had a history of depression in my past and I wonder sometimes whether ER will make it less or more likely that I have depressed thoughts.

Kudos to all of you have found your happy hunting ground in retirement and for whom those concerns are irrelevant.
...

Since I didn't work for a mega-corp or pretty much anyone other than myself for my "career" it was hard to pick a point at which I retired. Still pay bills, make lucrative deals, deal with the random rental issues - maybe I'm not retired. I do find that there is a true sense of accomplishment when the rentals need me and I cure a daunting problem - old fire horse back in the traces. If you think being retired means you don't HAVE to do anything then being forced to do something can give a sense of accomplishment that feels good.
I think individuals are pretty much fixed on the happy/sad scale and retirement is no panacea. When I'm feeling blue and don't know what to do the Life of Brian "Always look on the bright side of life" song comes to mind - or maybe the upbeat Hans Beinholtz:

 

[HadEnuff]

Yes, I understood the rational, just think it is still ridiculous. In Ontario the provincial govt controls all liquor sales and used to have all kinds of rules, like no booze on Sundays, no sales, etc. Eventually they figured out it was a loosing proposition.

By the way generally speaking liquor, wine, and beer are much cheaper in the US than Canada. Not sure if you have more drunks? Don't think so.

No, we just have more to drink about.

 

[NW-Bound]

Only if you will give the forum a photo of yourself

No deal, as my question was only rhetorical.

You did not achieve your potential because of the excessive time spent here on this forum.

 

[UnrealizedPotential]

No deal, as my question was only rhetorical.

You did not achieve your potential because of the excessive time spent here on this forum.

I tried and if you change your mind the offer stands

 

[unclemick]

There's a downside? Really?

Yes. At 22 yrs of ER I who never volunteer and say h-ll no a lot am busier than the 'one armed paper hanger' not to date myself.

Never realized how watching paint dry and grass grow could get so busy. My Wife's older Brother passed this year and we inherited the Farm which is in CRP grass with nothing to do so to speak.

heh heh heh -

 

[W2R]

Yes. At 22 yrs of ER I who never volunteer and say h-ll no a lot am busier than the 'one armed paper hanger' not to date myself.

Never realized how watching paint dry and grass grow could get so busy. My Wife's older Brother passed this year and we inherited the Farm which is in CRP grass with nothing to do so to speak.

heh heh heh -

UncleMick, I don't see how you do it! You are quite a dynamo to be keeping up with that farm at your age (which is even older than mine and I feel like I'm older than Methuselah). Give yourself a break! I know you love your new wife but maybe she would relent and let you sell the farm.

 

[Sunset]

....
I was probably in the position to FIRE about 4 years ago, but I am still working. I am still saving a good percentage of my income (~50%), but our household operates without a budget. We don't restrict our spending, and we have full freedom in terms of buying or spending on whatever we want. Our biggest expenditure is probably on travel. We go on 3-4 international trips a year, and fly business class, go on private tours, etc, with little regard to cost. Please understand, I'm not posting this to brag, but to give you an indication on the mindset I have when it comes to spending. As long as I'm still saving a good percentage of my income, then it's on and I don't restrict our spending in any way. If I FIREd, we would have to work within a budget. That's not really a bad thing, and it wouldn't be a big deal, but it's just different.
.....

Our spending was the same way (but less costly), no budget, just save a bunch and spend what we wanted out of what was left.
It wasn't hard as we are both cheap/frugal/careful , but it posed an issue when retiring, as we really had no idea what we spend per year.

I had to backtrack expenses and make estimates to see we could afford to retire once I figured out what we were spending.
We still spend less than we "should" but again it's not hard and it's a lot better than overspending.

I'm hoping we will ramp it up a bit, as most relatives are not deserving.

 

[Sunset]

.... I do find that there is a true sense of accomplishment when the rentals need me and I cure a daunting problem - old fire horse back in the traces. If you think being retired means you don't HAVE to do anything then being forced to do something can give a sense of accomplishment that feels good.......

+++
So true.

 

[HadEnuff]

As I stated, I am still "adjusting"... but that is not to say that adjusting is no fun. For example we are having an unseasonably beautiful day in our part of the Northeast today. I have over 250 bottles worth of wine waiting to be bottled. In my working days I'd have to devote an entire weekend to it. Now.... I just did about 25, and will soon go out for a walk in the beautiful sunshine and watch some more leaves fall from the trees.
I'll come back, rest up, and have dinner on the table when DW comes home from work. (Only 16 weeks until she retires!!!!),
It's an adjustment, but a sweet one, I guess.

 

[kcowan]

Not every state is like AZ. When traveling in the US, I often find it annoying having to find a liquor store, even in a western state like Montana, while in AZ any grocery market has what I want.

Looks like Washington has the highest taxes
State taxes on booze
whereas Arizona is like California.

 

[kcowan]

Through retirement, I had forgotten all about the notion of special chairs which only certain people can use.

Amethyst

and here I thought they were especially for the biggest *sses.

 

[braumeister]

Looks like Washington has the highest taxes
State taxes on booze
whereas Arizona is like California.

Aren't alcohol taxes much higher in most Canadian provinces?

 

[kgtest]

Be glad you are retired, co-worker of mine just signed up some other co-workers to come in and work on veteran's day. We work at a bank, and this is a multi-year project...what in the he!! possesses a person to schedule a meeting on a bank holiday. This veteran won't be coming in, but I am willing to bet the new girl does out of fear.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

What are your experiences regarding getting enough social interaction during retirement?

I am quite an introvert and very much a homebody (much to the disappointment of my DW) so I don't require much interaction. When I *do* go out, I can tend to be fairly outgoing and while I will NEVER be the center of the party, I can hold my own and I usually don't run people off.

Nonetheless, I also was quite friendly with my co-w*rkers. We spent quite a bit of time together (nature of the beast when you fly airplanes for an income) and it was fairly enjoyable. I *thought* I would miss much of this interaction but that really hasn't been the case. I rarely see/talk to any of them anymore and in all honesty, that is OK.

So...all that said...how DO I get interaction, you ask? Well, I am law school so I get *more* interaction than I would like in that environment so I don't think it counts. I do, however, still do dinner/lunch on occasion with life long friends and even will vacation or do short trips with them. It is true that we are in very different places in life (since none of them are retired), but that's never a hindrance. When I first retired, there was ribbing back and forth about me "sleeping all day" and "going back to w*rk", but most of that has subsided. So...all things considered, we still have a good time and I don't think our friendship(s) have suffered for it.

Lastly, I have met a couple of members here for "happy hour" on a few occasions and that has been really fun. Especially since they are also young and didn't "retire" in the traditional way, either. So...I would highly recommend looking for members that might be close to you and setting something up. And, if you are in a large metro area, it's quite possible that there might already be a "meet up" group that you could join.