marko
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
- Joined
- Mar 16, 2011
- Messages
- 8,509
As I've mentioned here a few times, my 62 year old brother suffered a massive stroke almost two years ago. I'll spare the details but if you envision a semi-independent 83 year old man, that's about where he is physically and cognitively today.
He's well enough that our 89 year old mom--who he lives with--can easily handle his needs; mostly companionship, med reminding and driving him to lunch and appointments (yes, she still drives). He's able to do most everything else on his own (bathing, dressing, light meals etc). We have a housekeeper who comes once a week.
Looking further down the line, I know that mom won't be around forever and I have an idea that I'm hoping will allow him to stay at home and avoid heading to an assisted living facility too soon.
So, here's my plan: Mom lives in a big house with an entirely separate four room apartment. Brother is staying in that apartment as it's all on one floor. When mom departs, my thinking is to offer mom's living space for free (or very modest rent) to "the right person" in exchange for providing my brother all the things mom was doing, mostly companionship and driving. Sort of a live-in "au pair" situation.
For brevity, I've left out a lot of details but that is the overall situation and idea. Living with me is not a good option.
But I'm wondering about what could be the downside of this idea:
What if the person --for any one of a dozen reasons-- doesn't work out?
What if things change and the person doesn't want to move out?
What if....? I don't know what I don't know.
As the time were to near, I would certainly run this by our attorney and likely have some sort of contract done, but I'm curious what the wise folk here think before I get too enamored with the idea.
He's well enough that our 89 year old mom--who he lives with--can easily handle his needs; mostly companionship, med reminding and driving him to lunch and appointments (yes, she still drives). He's able to do most everything else on his own (bathing, dressing, light meals etc). We have a housekeeper who comes once a week.
Looking further down the line, I know that mom won't be around forever and I have an idea that I'm hoping will allow him to stay at home and avoid heading to an assisted living facility too soon.
So, here's my plan: Mom lives in a big house with an entirely separate four room apartment. Brother is staying in that apartment as it's all on one floor. When mom departs, my thinking is to offer mom's living space for free (or very modest rent) to "the right person" in exchange for providing my brother all the things mom was doing, mostly companionship and driving. Sort of a live-in "au pair" situation.
For brevity, I've left out a lot of details but that is the overall situation and idea. Living with me is not a good option.
But I'm wondering about what could be the downside of this idea:
What if the person --for any one of a dozen reasons-- doesn't work out?
What if things change and the person doesn't want to move out?
What if....? I don't know what I don't know.
As the time were to near, I would certainly run this by our attorney and likely have some sort of contract done, but I'm curious what the wise folk here think before I get too enamored with the idea.