Feeling sad in retirement

[Koolau]

I can certainly sympathize those of you who had difficulties with your transition. I think it's going to be somewhat of an issue for us too. DW so identifies with what she does at work. She sees retirement as stepping off a plane and she's not so sure about the parachute.

We're all so different. My personal issue (pretty much singular) was whether we would have "enough" in retirement. When I had that solved, I relaxed at w*rk and actually began enjoying the position that I had created for myself at megacorp. When the position went away years later, I "stepped off" with virtually no qualms.

DW left the family business early to make way for the next generation. She wasn't quite ready, but was overjoyed about the transition. She didn't even worry about the "enough" question. She just assumed there was enough even though she rarely looked at the financial stuff I managed.

Mom and dad were "forced" out of the family business by circumstances - primarily dementia. It was sad and I think they really missed the day to day interactions and being "needed." I wouldn't quite call it depression, but something close to that.

3rd generation at the family business is already planning her "escape" even though she's only in her late 40s. She loves her w*rk and the challenge, but she has better things waiting to do beyond w*rk.

Three generations, all different reactions and approaches to retirement. I guess none of us should be surprised at someone ELSE's reaction to retirement. It's very personal.

 

[Seagirt]

@VAfoodie
I know what you mean, about wanting a rigorous, productive, absorbing routine, just like you had when you were working. Perhaps, like me, you believe it will keep you feeling good about yourself and the world.

Looking at it from the outside, there's nothing very enjoyable about the prospect of hours decluttering and then going to the gym, so it's not surprising to me that you lack enthusiasm about doing it. For myself, I don't want to listen anymore to that inner, critical voice that tells me I'm 'useless' if I don't buckle down and do all these hard things. Instead, I want my motivation to be that the rest of my wonderful life will just run more.smoothly if I take care of them.

I'm really limiting my media consumption because of how helpless and negative it makes me feel. The media wants to enslave our minds. But the internet is also a great way to explore new ideas and ways of being. For example, the happiness project.

Just a few thoughts, hoping I take my own advice.