Finding Purpose in Retirement

[flyingaway]

I'm very surprised to see such a comment on an Early Retirement board. Are you retired?


I think the biggest duping is that people are conditioned to believe that working is the way to achieve a sense of self worth or purpose if you will.



I retired at 50 and am almost 4 years in and I can say I feel so much better about my life doing volunteer work, exercising more, reading more books, sleeping better, helping my parents,and just an overall indescribable happiness living a life not tied to a job. Many days I feel like the luckiest man on earth.

What I actually wanted to say is that retirement should be free of seriously pursuing anything with a noble purpose, just enjoying your time. Doing nothing is probably the best.

If you really want to have a purpose, keeping working is a purpose.

 

[1242Vintage]

My purpose for retirement and driver for taking that step is to to have more time to spend with extended family. I have Mom down the lane, father in law in town and little brother who is disabled on the outskirts of town. I retired so I can have time with them.

And in order to be there for them, have to make sure I’m healthy. Working on trimming down my weight and regaining fitness as a priority.

We love to travel too ... and it’s also family-focused. Back in January little brother and I escaped for a brother week in Mexico. Try to get him out of the cold weather for a week or so every winter and get a little sunshine to brighten him up.

 

[eroscott]

I follow Wes Moss and have read his book. Below is a brief article on what I've mentioned to friends. There is also a related youtube video here (skip 1st minute):

Title: Why It’s Critical To Find Your Core Pursuits Before Retirement
https://www.wesmoss.com/news/why-its-critical-to-find-your-core-pursuits-before-retirement/

...
The happiest retirees have at least 3.5 core pursuits, according to our surveys and interviews with retirees across the country. The least happy engaged in just 1.9 such activities.

Core pursuits can run the gamut from golf or other sports to collecting to gardening to political activism to volunteering to traveling to earning a college degree. To paraphrase an old saying, a core pursuit is anything that flicks your Bic. Understand that these pursuits aren’t simple pastimes; they are passions to which the retirees devote a great deal of time, energy, and sometimes money. The happiest retirees prioritize their core pursuits and derive great satisfaction from those endeavors.
...

 

[Lawrencewendall]

My current purpose is to see how long I can sleep in every morning.

 

[flyingaway]

I think some may be misunderstanding your comment. I took your comment as, if someone retired, and then now seeks a sense of purpose in their post-work life, then maybe they shouldn't have retired yet. To which I agree.

I took the OP's thread topic as relating some information (to which one can take or leave), and was wondering what other retiree's do that they think is a sense of purpose (if they needed one) in their retired life. And I do think there ARE some retirees that really need a sense of purpose in their retirement lives. Personally, that is a non-issue for me. Not that I am competition with the past works of Mother Teresa, or anything like that!

Yes. You are correct.

I think that a retirement is to retire from pursuing any serious purpose.

 

[FREE866]

My current purpose is to see how long I can sleep in every morning.

right?


this whole idea of "what's your purpose" is a bit much I might add. All these articles and books on "what are your goals in life". That's like corporate America narrative BS in my view. I'm done with that part of my life! Enough already lol.



I like to do things via volunteer work that help animals and people and I'm immensely grateful to be in this position. That's enough for me. I don't want or need to have some grand plan to "change the world" or have to put undue pressure on myself to "do something". And yes, nothing beats the option to sleep late, especially on a Monday morning!

 

[Lawrencewendall]

right?


this whole idea of "what's your purpose" is a bit much I might add. All these articles and books on "what are your goals in life". That's like corporate America narrative BS in my view. I'm done with that part of my life! Enough already lol.



I like to do things via volunteer work that help animals and people and I'm immensely grateful to be in this position. That's enough for me. I don't want or need to have some grand plan to "change the world" or have to put undue pressure on myself to "do something". And yes, nothing beats the option to sleep late, especially on a Monday morning!

Only been RE'ed a year and I've already forgotten what day of the week it is!

 

[Midpack]

It's an individual thing - people who ridicule those who seek purpose are as wrong as though who ridicule those who “live in the present” almost exclusively. Some people need structure in life, some don't. Some people are extroverts, some introverts or something in between. Making money is supremely fulfilling to some people even if they have more than enough, to others enough is enough.

I enjoy the freedom of retirement and the only thing I've found essential to happiness is not hemming myself in with permanent personal commitments. I'm not sure I'll ever want to run anything again, I volunteered and took a position on a yacht club board early in retirement - I doubt I'll ever do anything like that again. OTOH I am more than happy to take on finite projects even ones that take a long time - there has to be goal/defined end or I'm unlikely to volunteer.

I am putting a lot of focus on golf and sailing right now, but I could drop one or both if something more interesting comes along - and probably will if my first 66 years are any indication. I've always enjoyed variety and new things over focusing on one thing (e.g. I know people who are happy playing golf or fishing every day - I would grow to hate any activity if I did it every day).

 

[harllee]

I have been retired almost 20 years now (retired at age 50) and during that time I have volunteered for organizations that I feel are very worthy of my time--that really gave me purpose. Right now my biggest purpose is helping my husband who has an autoimmune disease and my 90 year old mother to stay healthy.

 

[travelover]

I bought a blender and am working on whirled peas.

 

[RobbieB]

I've come real close to perfecting my bean sprout eggrolls.

 

[albireo13]

I like turtles!

 

[NW-Bound]

My purpose in life since ER 8 years ago was to stay healthy, and to travel as much as I want (too much travel could become tedious, same as work).

This year, no travel is possible due to Covid, and I have been spending a lot of time babysitting my DIY solar power system, tweaking it to supply my usage as much as possible and to make my electric bill as low as possible.

I carefully tested my lithium bank, and was pleased to see that the energy loss for a round-trip charging/discharging cycle was lower than 5%. And that made me happy.

 

[MissMolly]

Eat more bacon.

 

[Walt34]

Must I have a purpose? So far, I'm doing pretty well without. I just wake up every morning, do what I want all day and then go to bed when I get tired.

My thoughts exactly. I remember shortly after retirement, sitting on the back porch and thinking "Okay, what next?"

And it came to me, "Why do I have to do anything? I've spent all my life getting to the point where I don't HAVE to do anything."

A post by Nords explored that topic more fully a while back. I keep it bookmarked. Also note the tagline.

But if one has to have a "purpose" I just ordered two new R/C airplanes that will do things I've never done before with an airplane. One does extreme "3D" maneuvers. The other goes 140+ MPH. For an R/C airplane, that is "smokin"! Most R/C jets don't go that fast. One challenge there will be staying mentally far enough ahead of the airplane to keep it in sight.

https://www.horizonhobby.com/produc...000mah-30c-smart-battery-combo/EFL12350C.html

https://www.horizonhobby.com/produc...rt-bnf-basic-with-as3x-and-safe/EFL16550.html

 

[Navigator]

I think this is very individual. There are many things that I have found enjoyable about retiring. I don't miss the stress I had when I was working full-time. I was glad to be able to move somewhere without being constrained by work. I have been happy to be able to spend to rekindle a friendship with my best friend from high school (after many years I moved back to close to my hometown). I have enjoyed getting to spend more time with extended family.

While I have enjoyed those things I wouldn't consider them a sense of purpose. I did feel I wanted to do something meaningful that would provide some benefit to someone that wasn't easily available elsewhere. For several years I wrote a weight loss blog. And, that was rewarding, but eventually I felt I had said everything that I had to say and I was just repeating myself.

Right now, what I find rewarding is volunteering to help people use DNA to solve unknown parentage. Many people I help are people who were adopted like I was. In some cases, they weren't adopted but they don't know the identify of their biological father (some only learned about this as adults). Some have a deceased parent or even a grandparent who was adopted or had an unknown parent and they want to identify the unknown grandparent or great grandparent.

I do this help in several ways. I do volunteer ...coaching is a good word for a non-profit organizaiont. I help members of a Googlegroup that helps people doing these searches. In that role, I am mostly posting to a group and answering questions and giving people information and tips on how to do their specific search.

In some cases I help people with their specific DNA courses, doing most of the work for them. Most people get back their DNA results from Ancestry or 23andme or wherever and they have no idea how to use the results. It is entirely possible that someone can have results for even years and they have no idea how to analyze and someone who is knowledgeable can come in and solve the mystery in a day or two. Of course, not all searches are so simple. Some searches take years. Those are very satisfying to solve.

Of course, I enjoy solving the mystery and doing the search itself. It is fun to me. At the same time, I absolutely know that in many cases I am doing something to help someone to help someone who could never do this themselves. Some people can do the search with a little help and those are where coaching is involved. Some people could do the search if they were taught how to do it. Some people will seek out that knowledge and do the search. Others won't for a variety reasons (mostly because of real life obligations that are more of a priority such as their own jobs or taking care of their children, etc.). Some people could just never learn how to do it. I like being able to help those people and feel that I fulfill a real need.

Wow, that sounds fascinating! It also sounds like it could easily be a full time job. Do you just work on it when you feel the urge, or do you plan to do some every day?

 

[Navigator]

My thoughts exactly. I remember shortly after retirement, sitting on the back porch and thinking "Okay, what next?"

And it came to me, "Why do I have to do anything? I've spent all my life getting to the point where I don't HAVE to do anything."
[/URL]

I think this is the point. You don’t HAVE to do anything, so what do you WANT to do? A lot of people seem turned off by the word purpose and the idea of having goals seems too much like jargon from work. Let me ask the question in different ways: what do you enjoy doing? What activities do you find meaningful? What do you look forward to doing on a regular basis, now that you can do anything you want?

 

[Gumby]

I think this is the point. You don’t HAVE to do anything, so what do you WANT to do? A lot of people seem turned off by the word purpose and the idea of having goals seems too much like jargon from work. Let me ask the question in different ways: what do you enjoy doing? What activities do you find meaningful? What do you look forward to doing on a regular basis, now that you can do anything you want?

You have rephrased the question, but you appear still to be concerned with "doing something meaningful". I don't have to do anything meaningful; I'm retired. I worked hard all my life just so that I could be free to do completely frivolous things every day if I choose. Sure, there are things I enjoy doing, but I guess I have no need to feel that I am doing something meaningful.

 

[Katsmeow]

Wow, that sounds fascinating! It also sounds like it could easily be a full time job. Do you just work on it when you feel the urge, or do you plan to do some every day?

It could be a full time job. Some people do it as a full time job. I've had people offer to pay me and I turn it down. I turn it down because I don't want to be beholding to do it on a schedule. I don't want the stress of it being a job.

So I work on it when I feel like it. Now, most days, I feel like working on it and so I do it. I usually spend some time on it most days, but not every day. Today, for example, I just responded to a few emails and have spent less than 15 minutes. The other day I spent about 15 hours. So it depends. Sometimes a do nothing for a few days. But most days I usually spend a few hours on it.

 

[street]

^ very interesting and very rewarding I can tell.

 

[Navigator]

You have rephrased the question, but you appear still to be concerned with "doing something meaningful". I don't have to do anything meaningful; I'm retired. I worked hard all my life just so that I could be free to do completely frivolous things every day if I choose. Sure, there are things I enjoy doing, but I guess I have no need to feel that I am doing something meaningful.

Fair enough - your point is well taken.

 

[daylatedollarshort]

I don't have a purpose like I don't have a mission statement, performance review or quarterly objectives any more. I do have a lot of hobbies, friends and family, a pet, belong to some clubs, and we have a house and yard to take care of. All that keeps me pretty busy and content. We're not billionaires, but I grew up poor so am happy now just to not have to work and not have to worry about money, especially during this economy.

 

[chris2008]

I liked my job but was it meaningful?
I was making money for other people (and some for myself)
;-))

 

[Chuckanut]

I don't have a purpose like I don't have a mission statement,

No mission statement? Egads! Horrors!

I once sat in an interminable staff meeting where we spent at least 45 minutes listening to a three or four people argue about the placement of no more than four words in a mission statement.

Now that I think about it, one purpose in life that I fulfilled by retiring was no more time wasting staff meetings.

 

[Lawrencewendall]

Now that I think about it, one purpose in life that I fulfilled by retiring was no more time wasting staff meetings.

+1000