Force Severance / Struggling

surprising said:
I am in a similar situation with two daughters in college and each with 529 money that isn't enough to pay for all 4 years. Oldest daughter's 529 just ran out with 2 quarters to go and she knows she has to get a loan to cover the rest. However, who would've thought interest rates would skyrocket to multi-decade highs right before we need a loan!? She doesn't qualify for federal subsidized loans so she has to go private route where the interest rates are not great. SO, most likely we will end up loaning her the money at a more favorable interest rate, which will eat into our emergency savings (or sell stock).
If I were still working full time, I would have no problem paying for the rest of her college without dipping into savings, so that bums me out.

My youngest daughter is a sophomore in college at a much cheaper school that should've been completely covered by 529, but she will also run out of money because the drastic downturn in stocks and bonds really hit her 529 returns and so she started with significantly less than my older daughter. So in about a year and half I'll be figuring this all out again.

Both daughters are very responsible with money. My oldest has had a job the entire time in college to pay for room and board. This situation is not their fault, yet they are suffering. This is why I want to help rather than say "you ran out of money, tough luck." Just some things to consider.. the best of plans have no guarantee of working out.
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If your daughters need it, remind them that THEY can get j*bs and pay back a loan if they borrow for school. YOU can't borrow money to fund your retirement.:cool:
 
I’m sorry that your stupid company downsized you. Companies suck. Simple as that. There are people on this forum who can do a better job than I can of telling you whether you are financially ready to retire (although I’d say the answer is yes). I’m going to give you a slightly different perspective to think about.

I was let go from my company at the time in April 2020, just short of my 50th birthday. I had never been laid off before and I wasn’t horrified by it because I didn’t love the job or the idiot I reported to. I my have stopped working then if it hadn’t been for the nearly 7-figure drop in my net worth due to COVID and the resulting stock market drop. I felt scared. I would possibly have felt free as well, but all I could do at the time was stay home due to all the lockdowns. Anyway, I decided to post for some jobs and told myself that if I didn’t find anything by July then it wasn’t meant to be and that I should retire. Well, I found something quickly and was back to work the week after my severance ran out. I did well at the new company, which helped my confidence, but a new job opportunity popped up one year later. Although I had planned to quit after two years, I decided to take the new job and I started that 2-year clock again.

While I could have stopped working in 2020 and likely have been fine, I think that returning to work was a good thing for me emotionally. After working for two companies in a row where I didn’t feel valued, my confidence was down and my anger was up. During my last two jobs (especially my current job), my confidence has been restored. I know I’m good at what I do and feeling valued for my opinions has been great. Also, I now have the ability to make my own decision on when I’m going to walk away,

When the anger goes away, I would encourage you to at least check out some job boards. Maybe work for a year - you’re still young - and quit when YOU want to quit. Or maybe you even explore a career change and try something you’ve always wondered about, even if it doesn’t pay what you’re accustomed to. You can afford to retire financially, but the question is whether you are emotionally ready to retire. You may not be. That’s a personal call.
 
OP:
You're brave to share so much. I admire your candor. As for me: I wish I could have stayed in school as a career. I was very good at it. Did not want to TEACH, though. Lesson plans, administration requirements did not appeal to me at all. Looking back, I appreciated my teachers who could express things in such a way that they gave rise to my sudden flashes of insight, making all sorts of connections via the new learnings they offered. And among my academic gifts is the ability to write well.

The plodding, step-by-step method leaves me cold. And I knew that's what would be expected of me.

So, I tied myself to a goal, and GOT it! THEN I found out the job was nothing like I expected. Owing to the fact that I spent so much time in school, I got a late start on that career. After 19 (not 20--- for a reason!) years, I was more than ready to leave and retire. I was "encouraged" to retire. I took the open door, and have never looked back. I'm heartily enjoying the gift of so much more free time, and a great new location where there are no leaves to rake, no snow to shovel, no grass to mow. I can go to the beach here in January, if I want. With all of the required hoops to jump through and useless (USELESS!) meetings now in my past, I breathe easy.

Grab yourself a hobby or two. Or go volunteering. (I thought about volunteering, too. But everywhere these days requires that you prove you're NOT a criminal before they'll accept you. I refuse to be treated that way.). :)
 
OP, you might consider consulting or forming an LLC for yourself. That's what DH did after the megacorp meltdown. He took the year severance over a blowout that led to the tipping point of no return. We don't have kids. But I had just had major cancer surgery 2 months before he walked out. A big risk when health insurance only lasts a year and this was 2011 before ACA. He was 54 yrs. old.

It all worked out. His consulting business from home freed up a lot of his time as anxiety began to melt away. He is now fully RE. You can set up a home office, spend more time with the family, and take many household expenses off your taxes. Plus you control your schedule.
 
Folks, Its been ~ 3 months since my first post, and just thought I would give a quick update.

First, thank you for everyone posting who is very supportive and helpful, this has been an interesting and unsettling situation.

After reading the advice here, and talking to some folks who have gone through something similar, I got an advisor from Fidelity, and went through my plans with him. He made some recommendations, and also helped reassure me that I was in good shape. As a result, I have done some reorganization of things to get in better place for easier management and analysis.

One comment he made was that we have a lot of different accounts and investments and could my wife manage that if something happened to me. He is right on that, I have opened accounts with numerous brokerages over the years, and the reasons for that really aren't valid and it just makes it tougher to manage and analyze. Therefore, I have done quite a bit of consolidation and trying to liquidate some investments and move more to a simple total market ETF.

During this time, the anger has started to fade. I got the severance finalized, and it is quite generous. I have also been receiving calls from other companies asking about my availability, and "You have a great reputation in the industry" and "call us when you figure out what you want" - this is always comforting to hear. At the same time, my former direct supervisor is also known in the industry, and lets just say he has an opposite reputation.

I don't know for sure If I want to go back to work or not. So far, I haven't been bored, but haven't found a calling either. My wife is working, and kids aren't quite old enough for us to travel freely without them yet.

If I found something that I can work a couple weeks a month, take a long summer vacation, spend holidays at home, that might be interesting. Rianne's post about consulting could be one option.

Bottom line, everything looks good to ER, but I need to make a decision if I am done or not....IF not, what does it look like? I don't see a 60hr a week pressure cooker job, but maybe something else... or not... But I have some time anyway before my non-compete is up.

Thanks again for all the wonderful thoughts and ideas.
 
Thanks for checking in and letting us know how things are going. It's always good to hear the follow-up and know that our suggestions did not just fall into a black hole!

It sounds like your Fidelity advisor has given you some good advice about consolidating. It's a lot easier to see what your asset allocation and risk levels are when there are fewer accounts to look at.

If you are looking for something to do short term, may I suggest volunteering with AARP Tax-Aide in your area? There's some training in January and then you'd be busy a couple days a week from Feb 1 through Apr 15. It's a good way to meet new people while helping others, and it lets you exercise your brain a bit.
 
cathy63 said:
Thanks for checking in and letting us know how things are going. It's always good to hear the follow-up and know that our suggestions did not just fall into a black hole!

It sounds like your Fidelity advisor has given you some good advice about consolidating. It's a lot easier to see what your asset allocation and risk levels are when there are fewer accounts to look at.

If you are looking for something to do short term, may I suggest volunteering with AARP Tax-Aide in your area? There's some training in January and then you'd be busy a couple days a week from Feb 1 through Apr 15. It's a good way to meet new people while helping others, and it lets you exercise your brain a bit.
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Bold by me. That's exactly what I'm doing Cathy63. I start training next month. Have you done this in the past? I'm not a CPA and assume my work is checked before the tax returns are submitted. The volunteering is at our local library which is a 10-minute drive. Looking forward to the training and helping others.
 
Rianne said:
Bold by me. That's exactly what I'm doing Cathy63. I start training next month. Have you done this in the past? I'm not a CPA and assume my work is checked before the tax returns are submitted. The volunteering is at our local library which is a 10-minute drive. Looking forward to the training and helping others.
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Yes, I have done it for several years and am now a site coordinator and instructor. And yes, every tax return is quality reviewed by another trained counselor before it's printed, reviewed with the taxpayer(s) and e-filed.
 
ERasap said:
One comment he made was that we have a lot of different accounts and investments and could my wife manage that if something happened to me. He is right on that, I have opened accounts with numerous brokerages over the years, and the reasons for that really aren't valid and it just makes it tougher to manage and analyze. Therefore, I have done quite a bit of consolidation and trying to liquidate some investments and move more to a simple total market ETF.

.
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yep, updating my "death book" and will be consolidating down to one brokerage & one outside bank/credit union.

after a close relative, younger than me, suddenly died earlier this month.

right now his widow is struggling with winding up his business since he handled all that, and household finances, including taxes, himself.
 
cathy63 said:
Yes, I have done it for several years and am now a site coordinator and instructor. And yes, every tax return is quality reviewed by another trained counselor before it's printed, reviewed with the taxpayer(s) and e-filed.
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Sorry, I don't mean to hijack this thread. I just talked to the site coordinator and shared my concern about mistakes. He assured me there are many counselors to help and ask questions. But he said if you see a return there's some stock trading and decide to brush that under the table, I would be held accountable :LOL: There is no way I'd play around with that sort of thing. He did encourage me and said it is a lot of fun.
 
OP--
Thanks for coming back with an update!
Glad things are working our for you in the meantime.
with many of those companies calling you, perhaps you could offer to be available on a short term basis or as a consultant, rather than full time employee. If they are calling you, you are in the drivers seat--take advantage if you can and desire too.

Best wishes for you in the future. Enjoy your time with your family.
 
ncbill said:
yep, updating my "death book" and will be consolidating down to one brokerage & one outside bank/credit union.

after a close relative, younger than me, suddenly died earlier this month.

right now his widow is struggling with winding up his business since he handled all that, and household finances, including taxes, himself.
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Starting my "death book" next year (Jan.) Any general suggestions what to include/how to organize. DW doesn't need lots of detail. Just where everything is and how to access.
 
Koolau said:
Starting my "death book" next year (Jan.) Any general suggestions what to include/how to organize. DW doesn't need lots of detail. Just where everything is and how to access.
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A few years ago I put together a document for DW. I previously did all of the household finances, but in the last few years we do them together. Although she has a working knowledge now, that document I assembled will be a big help when I likely predecease her.
My document is detailed, BUT broken down in short (1-2 pages each) categories. Very first page is "In Event of My Death" and lists the various entities she should call, and a couple of To-Do items she should do relatively soon after my death. There are also pages with snapshots of what she needs to know followed by supplemental details if she needs/wants to drill down further.
If you're so inclined, PM me and I can send you an edited copy as a possible template.
 
Koolau said:
Starting my "death book" next year (Jan.) Any general suggestions what to include/how to organize. DW doesn't need lots of detail. Just where everything is and how to access.
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Our death binder includes:

List of recurring bills with vendor contact information and account numbers.

Credit cards with account numbers and contact information.

Driver's license numbers and contact information for the Motor Vehicles folks.

Church contact information for notification purposes.

List of our final wishes. Organ donation, funeral and cremation desires.

Recommended firm to use for the estate sale.

All necessary information for our medical, home and car insurance. Contact information and policy numbers.

How to handle my pension and who to contact.

Locations of all financial assets with contact information and account numbers.

List of other accounts to close with necessary information: email, social media, library cards, frequent travelor programs

Who to notify: volunteer organizations, friends, family, high schools and colleges we attended, our doctors.

In case I go before my wife, I included directions on how to handle things like estimated tax payments, submitting tax returns, and where to go for help if needed.

Where to find the login information for our online accounts.
 
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mystang52 said:
A few years ago I put together a document for DW. I previously did all of the household finances, but in the last few years we do them together. Although she has a working knowledge now, that document I assembled will be a big help when I likely predecease her.
My document is detailed, BUT broken down in short (1-2 pages each) categories. Very first page is "In Event of My Death" and lists the various entities she should call, and a couple of To-Do items she should do relatively soon after my death. There are also pages with snapshots of what she needs to know followed by supplemental details if she needs/wants to drill down further.
If you're so inclined, PM me and I can send you an edited copy as a possible template.
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Thanks. As I begin a "model" of my book, I may take you up on your offer.

So far, I'm thinking I need (as you mentioned) sort of a "first things first" page. Then some detailed things like "where's the insurance and how much might you expect." Maybe some pages on our accounts (mostly Vanguard with their names and our acct. nos.) Something about funeral service planning (what songs/verses, etc.) Maybe final notes to DW and to the kids (though I'm debating that one - probably better in a sealed envelope.)

I plan to leave LOTS of room to add/change things. If I keep any kind of running tally on values, then accounts could get messy/complicated.

I figure too that I need to leave notes about where to find "stuff" (Car titles etc.)

Just trying to think: What would I want to have if I were DW. I'm willing to play it by ear to a certain extent. That's my one and only NY resolution is to complete that "book" next year.
 
Lewis Clark said:
Our death binder includes:

List of recurring bills with vendor contact information and account numbers.

Credit cards with account numbers and contact information.

Driver's license numbers and contact information for the Motor Vehicles folks.

Church contact information for notification purposes.

List of our final wishes. Organ donation, funeral and cremation desires.

Recommended firm to use for the estate sale.

All necessary information for our medical, home and car insurance. Contact information and policy numbers.

How to handle my pension and who to contact.

Locations of all financial assets with contact information and account numbers.

List of other accounts to close with necessary information: email, social media, library cards, frequent travelor programs

Who to notify: volunteer organizations, friends, family, high schools and colleges we attended, our doctors.

In case I go before my wife, I included directions on how to handle things like estimated tax payments, submitting tax returns, and where to go for help if needed.

Where to find the login information for our online accounts.
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I ordered this notebook/binder from Amazon: "I'm Dead, Now What?"

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1441317996/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Now I just have to get it filled in!
 
Koolau said:
I plan to leave LOTS of room to add/change things. If I keep any kind of running tally on values, then accounts could get messy/complicated.
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We keep our death binder in a loose leaf notebook. Very easy to add and remove pages as needed.
 
Good luck and you seem good to go! Hoping that doesn't happen to my DH but he'll get there. Probably why we have always saved.
 
Lewis Clark said:
We keep our death binder in a loose leaf notebook. Very easy to add and remove pages as needed.
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I thought about that and may go that way. But I just liked the idea of a "permanent" note book (heh, heh, more permanent than I am.:facepalm::LOL:)
 
I'm training DH how to use the password manager, pay CC every month, and keep track of "ach" in the checking account. We have equal access to all accounts in VG and do not need each other's approval to do anything. I reinvest and buy new CDs and treasuries in his Roth and tIRA. We discuss the process beforehand and both must agree. We have equal access to the trust and communicate with the attorney together. We discuss what to buy and sell in the taxable. All our beneficiaries are known to each other and will be honored by the death of either one of us. If both of us die, our trustee knows everything. We're as transparent as a couple can get.
 
Rianne said:
I'm training DH how to use the password manager, pay CC every month, and keep track of "ach" in the checking account. We have equal access to all accounts in VG and do not need each other's approval to do anything. I reinvest and buy new CDs and treasuries in his Roth and tIRA. We discuss the process beforehand and both must agree. We have equal access to the trust and communicate with the attorney together. We discuss what to buy and sell in the taxable. All our beneficiaries are known to each other and will be honored by the death of either one of us. If both of us die, our trustee knows everything. We're as transparent as a couple can get.
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Just an FYI which I posted in anther thread... I thought that I could do anything in my DWs account but found out that 'all access' is not really 'all access'...



Now, if you go into their account under their login you can do anything, but there are things you cannot do under your login...



Not sure of this but some accounts are frozen when a broker finds out the person has passed... waiting for the person who is legally able to do anything...
 
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