Getting depressed about illnesses and deaths

[Scuba]

Ironic that this just out about "Death Anxiety"

https://psyche.co/guides/how-to-dea...e-help-of-cbt?utm_source=recommendedreads.com

Excellent article! Thank you for sharing.

 

[Scuba]

Scuba,
How are you doing?

To handle negative feelings I only give myself so much time to deal with it. I know from experience that to remain fixed on something I cannot change just leads into more uncertainty.

Thank you for asking. I suppose our move jolted me out of dwelling on negative or sad thoughts. We moved from CA to FL on 10/21 and have been so busy preparing and then unpacking and getting settled in that there has been no time for thinking of much of anything. I’m just now reading everyone’s comments.

I really appreciate the empathetic comments and specific suggestions. I ordered the Henry Marsh book lucky penny recommended, and also the article linked above. I think both will help me as I get my head above the moving process.

With moving into a 55+ community, I can already see that we will be regularly faced with illnesses and deaths even more frequently than before, so having suggestions and reading materials about how to deal with this will be really helpful.

 

[Scuba]

Thanks to all of you who shared stories of what you and your loved ones have gone through. Certainly I am very grateful that DH and I are in good health and are comfortable financially.

I’m sure our move contributed to my feelings of loss. On the other hand, it forced me to put feelings about anything aside and focus on tasks that needed to be done to prepare and deal with moving. As you all know, it’s pretty all-consuming.

I’m going to take many of your suggestions to heart as we settle into our new home, neighborhood, and our next chapter in life. Thank you to everyone who shared your stories and helpful suggestions!

 

[brett]

I have had a number of friends and colleagues pass away in their late 50's and early 60's.

DW has lost a sister and a brother. Now, her younger sister has brain cancer..... 6 months horizon. Her mother passed at age 55 with cancer, her father at 72.

My sister sits at home focused on nothing but her own health. Complaining about everything. Sad.

Us? We wake up every every morning thankful for our good health. Apart from the usual minor age related issues. Thankful that we actually woke up. Thankful for what we have.

Our thoughts are always about two things. How fortunate we are and what our short and long term plans are for moving forward.

Really...what else can we do? Sit at home, depressed, moping about feeling sorry for ourselves?

Or getting out there and making the most of our retirement and the time that we each have left.

We made a choice to keep moving forward. It is all about choice.

One month and we are off to Puerta Vallarta for two weeks by the sea Afer that...Xmas with our daughter and family. In the new year....not sure yet but DW is counting on me to get some sort of snowbird trip organized. This is our horizon.

No thoughts of feeling sorry for ourselves. The opposite is true.