The big ticket wedding...

[ivinsfan]

IMO, the 'best' weddings I've attended have been rather low-key events. American Legion Halls, small restaurant rooms with a jazz combo and buffet style food, etc.

Doing a bit of analyzing, I realize why that is (at least for me). The big 'events' turn it into a show, and I think that actually distracts from the real reason we are here - the Bride & Groom and friends & family. It becomes a 'show', and adds a lot of stress, because every step of the 'show' is expected to come off flawlessly, and something is likely to go wrong with so much going on for a one-time event.

Relax, take time to mix and mingle with your guests, have fun. If your guests want to be entertained, they can go see Blue Man Group, or something. That's my personal advice, but to each their own.

But please, if you must have a DJ, please make sure they don't push their sound into a high-decibel, high-distortion screech. And have them take a break once in a while, so people have a chance to talk.

-ERD50

+1......and all of this "show" adds to the bill. One of most confusing trends is the emergence of what I view as "massive" wedding parties. Mid-20 something couples that have 6, 8 or GULP even more pairs of bridemaids and groomsmen...how is that even special to pick 12 or 16 of your "closest" friends to stand up for you.It makes the honor an expensive joke to the attendants IMO....I'd be hard pressed to spend 500 bucks on a dress to be part of a mob.

 

[pb4uski]

+1......and all of this "show" adds to the bill. One of most confusing trends is the emergence of what I view as "massive" wedding parties. Mid-20 something couples that have 6, 8 or GULP even more pairs of bridemaids and groomsmen...how is that even special to pick 12 or 16 of your "closest" friends to stand up for you.It makes the honor an expensive joke to the attendants IMO....I'd be hard pressed to spend 500 bucks on a dress to be part of a mob.

Heck, I'm not sure I have 6-8 or 12-16 "close" friends even today.... and that would mean 12-16 or 24-32 for DW and I combined, not to mentions that many that would be wiling to spend big bucks to be in a wedding.

I forgot how many attendants we had (perhaps 4) and even that was a challenge... we were too busy working to have loads of friends.

 

[Ronstar]

These do sound like a bit of fun especially the reception in the barnyard. What kind of boots did the bride wear? .

I don't mean to knock fancy weddings, if that is what brings people joy (don't want to be the nuptial equivalent of those Puritans, who frown on large houses just because they are large).

I can't remember, or even noticed, but DW says that the bride wore pumps for the whole event. The father of the bride spent weeks grooming the barn yard, so partying in decent clothes wasn't a problem. Weather was great. He planted several rows of sunflowers surrounding the barnyard, and a full moon rose over the corn fields and sunflowers. It was cool.

 

[rodi]

I agree that the smaller, casual weddings are often funner. My wedding was at an ocean front park. My bff was "best maid" - our only attendant. She also made my dress (as her wedding gift to us. I did use "theknot.com" for ideas on the wedding, and found a great resource for roses for do it yourself hand tied bouquets. We registered at Target rather than a big department store, and made sure it was all low cost stuff that we could use.

Our wedding was small - less than 20 people including ourselves and the minister. Small enough that we were able to do a wedding lunchean for under $500 at an oceanfront restaurant. We had a slightly bigger party at my sister's house later that evening.

The comments about having "wedding" associated with the event is absolutely true. We had a reception in Philly (married in San Diego) for our friends and family there. It was bigger. Catering hall tried to up the per-person price by $20 when they realized it was wedding related - but we were able to hold them to the original party price pointing out that we'd been married for 6 weeks at the time of our party - it was just a celebration.

For our travel to San Diego, the wedding, the fabric for my dress, the invites, our honeymoon on Maui, and our party in Philly we spend a total of $7k. Travel to San Diego and the honeymoon had to be accounted for together since it was done on an open jaw ticket.