What "phase" of retirement are you in?

[Rianne]

All four phases blur into one year for us. We vacation part of the year, feel lost part of the year, try out new things part of the year, and generally at the end of the year, reinvent and rewire for next year.

 

[ERhoosier]

As evidenced by the comments here, those are not phases but descriptions of what folks do in retirement. There is no reproducible 'progression'....at least in my experience of 2 retirements so far .

 

[timeismine]

Re; 4 Stages of retirement-helps to know not the only one hit by the bus

Great post!

A great summary of an important aspect of retiring that many, including myself, miss.

Happily I'm in Phase 3, after being run over by the Phase 2 bus a bunch of times over the last three years, some of the time from the "Phase 3-slip back into Phase 2" cycle mentioned in the talk. One of the hardest for me was the perceived loss of identity, that I am now invisible to the working world, which became a big benefit now enjoyed. Accepting I am "old" is also freeing and a benefit, instead of being depressed about decline.

Knowing these phases and that they are common to the process of being "retired" helps. Many texts on psychology talk about observing, seeing yourself from the outside in the third person. One author describes this as "going to the balcony" and watching your own thoughts. Outlining these Four Phases of Retirement helps me go to my balcony, and go deeper on where this journey is taking me.

Thanks!

 

[almost there]

Different levels of "stockholm syndrome", can keep you from feeling like everyday is Saturday. Hopefully those folks get over it soon. Was the worst 5 minutes of my life.

 

[H2ODude]

Trying to put people in boxes like this strikes me as just pointless and without merit. Our journey has been a mixture with not a lot of "lost." Covid screwed up the vacation part. Now we're getting ready for our final visit to Drs. for DW of 52 years to get finalized diagnosis of Alzheimers. What f__king phase is that? She's doing just fine, me not so much. 71.

 

[Koolau]

Trying to put people in boxes like this strikes me as just pointless and without merit. Our journey has been a mixture with not a lot of "lost." Covid screwed up the vacation part. Now we're getting ready for our final visit to Drs. for DW of 52 years to get finalized diagnosis of Alzheimers. What f__king phase is that? She's doing just fine, me not so much. 71.

Yeah, that diagnosis kind of puts everything else on hold. Going forward, life centers on it. Any phases lose their meaning - especially until you learn how to deal with the new reality.

Seek lots of help - it's out there. Blessings on you and DW.

 

[Andre1969]

I guess that four-step process might apply to some people. However, I always imagined that making the transition to retirement would sort of be like the "Bewitchin' Pool" episode of "The Twilight Zone." There's a line in that episode, "Those voices you hear calling, at first they seem quite strong. But after awhile they'll fade, and then one day you just simply can't hear 'em anymore!"

And that's how I pretty much envision it. When I retire, there are going to be naysayers, and perhaps even my own inner voice, the keeps trying to call me back to the working world. But, over time it fades away. And eventually, the working world becomes nothing more than a dream remembered, a civilization gone with the wind!

 

[habelsgtb]

After retiring in Oct 2O20, I think I go between 2 and 3. Just recently both my wife and I figured out that our passion for motorcycling has faded and time to let others enjoy our two motorcycles. More room in the garage and closet (gear). More of my time is spent in 3; trying new things out, helping my aging parents, social justice, and getting more routine. It’s hard sometimes but it feels right. I hope to do more for others and jump to 4 soon.

 

[Al in Ohio]

Starting year 6 still in Phase 1 with a spreadsheet of phase 1 planned for the next 5 years in the future also.

 

[old medic]

I must be doing something wrong, today its been 7 months since my last day, and still feel like I have tons of work to get done...

 

[eytonxav]

10 years in, trying to figure out my phase is too much like work.

 

[target2019]

I just came across this recent TED talk where the presenter suggests that there are 4 phases of retirement:

Here are the phases, roughly paraphrased:
Phase 1 - Vacation phase
Phase 2 - you feel loss and feel lost
Phase 3 - a time of trial and error, trying out new things
Phase 4 - a time to reinvent and rewire

Having retired at the beginning of the pandemic, I feel like Phase 1 completely slipped by without feeling that sense of "vacation" at all quite frankly.

I'd put myself at Phase 2, trying my darndest to get to Phase 3. It's been a touch Phase 2 in general and I'm ready to start enjoying things a bit more.

I know there are those of you who started out in Phase 1 and are still there...Or who jumped from Phase 1 to Phase 4. My hat is off to you!! Tell me your secret!!!

So how about you? Where do you fall? And, if you experienced Phase 2, how long would you say you were stuck there?

Like you, due to pandemic and serious health problems, Phase 1 was skipped. Difference for me was the next year or so. Loss, re-discovering old interests, and rewiring were all concurrent.

 

[brett]

We started early retirement by selling our home, storing what we decided to keep, and traveling internationally for seven months. Then we rented a furnished apt. downtown for three months.

The oddest question we had was in month 4 of travel on a last minute cruise cruise that we picked up.

The question...'why on earth would you do something like that' came from another retiree.

The only response possible for either of us was 'why not'

Do not believe in phases. For us it is at time to stretch and do things that we were previously unable to do for whatever reason. Or try new things, new experiences.

 

[CincyDave]

^This. Those labels are ridiculous

I agree. Too much over analyzing everything. You're retired. Do what you want when you want. I just got Netflix, so I'm currently in a binge watching phase. So many interesting shows. Hard to pick.

 

[Aiming_4_55]

Hmmm I didn't watch the podcast, but in Phase 0 - not started and OMY, but have not reached my target age of 55 yet either. My personal phase 0 - not started, OMY, but FI. ;-)

 

[brett]

One thing that I have noticed as I have moved through 12 years of so of retirement is that I have become more even more liberal in my views, more tolerant, and much more thankful and aware of what I have and the country where I live. It could well be a result of travel.

My spouse and I have always been at opposite ends of the spectrum on some things. She as moved a little but not as much as I have in retirement.

Not certain if this is part of the aging process. Saw this a little in both of my late parents.

 

[Jkirk]

I just came across this recent TED talk where the presenter suggests that there are 4 phases of retirement:

Here are the phases, roughly paraphrased:

Phase 1 - Vacation phase

Phase 2 - you feel loss and feel lost

Phase 3 - a time of trial and error, trying out new things

Phase 4 - a time to reinvent and rewire



Having retired at the beginning of the pandemic, I feel like Phase 1 completely slipped by without feeling that sense of "vacation" at all quite frankly.



I'd put myself at Phase 2, trying my darndest to get to Phase 3. It's been a touch Phase 2 in general and I'm ready to start enjoying things a bit more.



I know there are those of you who started out in Phase 1 and are still there...Or who jumped from Phase 1 to Phase 4. My hat is off to you!! Tell me your secret!!!



So how about you? Where do you fall? And, if you experienced Phase 2, how long would you say you were stuck there?

Thank you for sharing this, I needed that! I also retired during COVID, so I too feel like I skipped phase 1. Phase 2 was too much for me, so I went back to work and reset to phase 0…

Before I re-retire, I need to have a non-financial retirement plan. The money part is easier to figure out, pretty basic math combined with some discipline and patience. The psychological aspect of retirement needs more attention.

 

[Jkirk]

I'm envious all you Phase 1 people!!!
In all honestly, this past year and a half has brought so many challenges that I wish we could just start all over.

Now, there's a thought...

I sort of did start over. I retired from a pretty high stress job that was very much part of my identity. Phase 2 was too much, went back to work as a consultant. Gives me meaning with much less stress. My hope is that when I retire again, phase 2 won’t be as bad.

 

[Markola]

Everyone is different but DW experienced the phases he outlined, in order. On the other hand, I’ve just been feeling my way through things after I quit my job in July 2020. After a year long break, some consulting opportunities fell out of the sky, which I said yes to. It’s allowed me to shift into an enjoyable teaching phase (Phase 4) within my field of expertise and without so many team management, revenue goals and corporate/HR hassles. As I said, everyone is different.

 

[Jkirk]

no offense to the OP, but I always find these type of videos silly...


reminds me of those nonsensical tests I would have to take when I was working to find out what my "personality" was and how that could help me attract a certain type of client, blah, blah , blah blah , blah


I was in the happy phase when I retired 5+ years ago and I'm still in it today...retirement for me is an indescribable feeling of freedom...thats the phase I'm in!

It’s interesting to read all of these thoughts on the video. I wonder if there has been research into the difference in people who easily adjust to retirement and those that do not.

We’re all different.

 

[steady saver]

Thank you for sharing this, I needed that! I also retired during COVID, so I too feel like I skipped phase 1. Phase 2 was too much for me, so I went back to work and reset to phase 0…

Before I re-retire, I need to have a non-financial retirement plan. The money part is easier to figure out, pretty basic math combined with some discipline and patience. The psychological aspect of retirement needs more attention.

I'm glad it was helpful. I'm happy for all who had the vacation phase for a long time and who perhaps never left that phase. It simply wasn't what happened with me and I found some comfort in this talk and the phases he outlined. While I would've liked that vacation mentality, the cards didn't line up and much of it was out of my control (Covid, yes, but also health issues, family issues, death...many losses). So I don't apologize or feel bad about not having had that nirvana vacation experience. It just was what it was. And I didn't do anything wrong, nor did you. But I do learn something each time things don't go the way I'd rather them go and I take that as a gift. Right now, I'd say I'm in the "life is good!" category...maybe a bit of vacation mode and a lot of "I'll try that!" thinking. Having a tough go of things right after retirement just makes this time all the more sweet. Good luck with your current work. Enjoy!

 

[Koolau]

It’s interesting to read all of these thoughts on the video. I wonder if there has been research into the difference in people who easily adjust to retirement and those that do not.

We’re all different.

I can't help with WHY folks are different, but I couldn't find two folks more different than my dad and me. Dad hated retirement and I took to it immediately. I can only guess it was our situations during our formative years. Dad ALWAYS had to work simply to survive. I was not pampered, but I had a lot of choices. YMMV

 

[Getyoung]

5 years or retirement and still in phase 1! I don't miss the work, the people, nothing. When I think back to the hours of mind numbing meetings and politics, I pinch myself to make sure that it is true that I am done with that crap. Retirement has been a gift and extremely liberating, I try to make every day count.

 

[Teacher Terry]

Trying to put people in boxes like this strikes me as just pointless and without merit. Our journey has been a mixture with not a lot of "lost." Covid screwed up the vacation part. Now we're getting ready for our final visit to Drs. for DW of 52 years to get finalized diagnosis of Alzheimers. What f__king phase is that? She's doing just fine, me not so much. 71.

I am so very sorry for your news. My second ex husband recently received the same news about his wife. He is basically her caregiver. They have spent every Christmas for 20 years with her family and he asked if they could come spend it this year with me and our kids. I said of course. My dad had a massive stroke at 59 and my mom cared for him for 14 years. They had many travel plans that never were realized. You never are guaranteed time.

 

[Happyras]

I enjoyed the TED talk and decided to delete what I was going to post....