What was your greatest epiphany?

[isisdave]

1. People will generally do what they want to do, although "want to do" is sometimes vague and hard to figure out. Some are impulsive, and some think it out, but in general it seems to be true.

2. On the other hand, in terms of responsibility or business function, for example, when people DON'T know what to do, they often do nothing until something happens to force the issue. For example, the DMV clerk at the car dealer who doesn't know how to handle a problem with an out-of-state title just lets it sit until the customer files a complaint with the state .... yeah. Your dog has weird symptoms, but you don't take her to the vet until ... yeah.

 

[ERD50]

The value of time.

The variance of wealth between people is vast, but the time not so much. Hundreds of billions vs pocket jingle. However length of life, not so much. 100 years is a long life, but even homeless people can make it to 60 easy.

So I've tried to use my time doing things that I liked to do and wanted to do. Things I enjoyed and made me happy. Start every day with a smile and a sense of adventure and excitement. Because I just don't have time to be miserable.

I think I just had my epiphany!

Hah, not really. But I have been kind of stressed out over something lately, and I have actually told myself that more than a few times, but it just hasn't helped enough.

Seeing someone else mention it made me smile, maybe it will 'take' this time!

-ERD50

 

[travelover]

Learning the difference between intelligence and wisdom.

 

[Time2re]

I read this one a long time go, and the light came on, life got easier.
“Family isn’t always blood. It’s the people in your life that want you in theirs; the ones that accept you for who you are. The ones who would do anything to see you smile and love you no matter what.”

 

[RetiredHappy]

My golf handicap is not reflective of my true golf skills, so don't feel bad about it.

 

[Jerry1]

This sounds sarcastic, but isn't meant that way.

In college I realized that wherever you go, there you are.

Not sarcastic at all. Similar epiphany here. I read that and relate it to my epiphany that you have to look inside, take responsibility for your actions. Can't tell you how many times I've seen people complain about their situation only to move on and have it happen to them again, and again . . . Maybe it is you? I try in my life to realize that It Is Me.

Another epiphany I've had is that life is better if you're grateful. Something comes from the realization that very few if anyone is more than one catastrophe away from collapse. Basically the "There but for the grace of God go I" epiphany.

Then my introvert epiphany that came way too late in life. I found it much easier to just tell people that I would not be joining them (after work, social events . . .) than it was to tell them I would be there and then make up an excuse that day why I wouldn't be joining. The just say No epiphany.

 

[Keim]

Not sarcastic at all. Similar epiphany here. I read that and relate it to my epiphany that you have to look inside, take responsibility for your actions. Can't tell you how many times I've seen people complain about their situation only to move on and have it happen to them again, and again . . . Maybe it is you? I try in my life to realize that It Is Me.

You got it.

 

[RobbieB]

Then my introvert epiphany that came way too late in life. I found it much easier to just tell people that I would not be joining them (after work, social events . . .) than it was to tell them I would be there and then make up an excuse that day why I wouldn't be joining. The just say No epiphany.

I had no problem with after hours social events as long as the Company was buying -

 

[SecretlyFI]

Another epiphany I've had is that life is better if you're grateful. Something comes from the realization that very few if anyone is more than one catastrophe away from collapse. Basically the "There but for the grace of God go I" epiphany.

+1 When I am feeling anxious or depressed if I find gratitude to be the most powerful mood-changer.

I’ve had 2 big epiphanies related to communicating with others. One is, people will most often believe what they want to believe. So when you say very little, they draw the conclusion they were hoping for. The other is that often it’s more telling what people don’t say, than what they do say.

 

[bobbyr]

Another epiphany I've had is that life is better if you're grateful. Something comes from the realization that very few if anyone is more than one catastrophe away from collapse. Basically the "There but for the grace of God go I" epiphany.

++

 

[Badger]

I had originally planned/studied to work as a field biologist until the last year of undergrad school and throughout grad school when I taught biology classes. It was then I knew teaching was what really gave me satisfaction. After graduation I was hired to teach various biology and chemistry classes but mostly what they wanted me to do was teach Anatomy/Physiology. After a few more places also wanted me to teach A&P classes I realized that I was destined to teach future doctors, nurses, Physical therapist, etc. and it was no longer in my control.

Next to finding my wife it was the best thing to ever happen to me. I often see former students who are now practicing in their chosen health field and helping others. It has been rewarding to know I had some positive influence through all those years.



Cheers!

 

[target2019]

What was my greatest epiphany?

Everybody lies.

 

[frayne]

My golf handicap is not reflective of my true golf skills, so don't feel bad about it.

+1 and in spades.

 

[frayne]

Everyone remembers the good old days that weren't all that good and man has been and always will be, inhumane to his fellow man. Chaos is reality.

 

[rantk81]

1) After transitioning from being a student at university to being employed at my first full time job -- Realizing it is OK to admit that you don't know how to do something or that you're having trouble understanding something. Going from an environment where I was constantly graded on my competency on a subject, to an environment where it was normal to tackle new things that needed to be figured out.

2) Everyone is figuring things out as they go along. The "adults in the room" are all just pretending to know what they're doing.

 

[Gumby]

What was my greatest epiphany?

Everybody lies.

True in my experience. Over the course of my legal career, I questioned literally hundreds of witnesses, under oath, either in the courtroom or at a deposition. Every single one of them lied to me at least once, sometimes about the most trivial of things. How do I know? Because, if I asked a question, it was likely (approaching 100% probability if I was asking in court) that I already knew the answer based on documents or other witnesses.

 

[Ready-4-ER-at-14]

I thought of 2 responses.

1. I think it was everyone has something to teach me of value if I am open to it and pay attention.

I met a gal in organic chemistry in college not only was she extremely lovely with red hair and green eyes, but extremely intelligent and blessed with photographic memory. A second guy joined us sitting in the front who was also quite attractive and we three were all friendly and always got the top marks. One day, weeks or months later, he chose to not sit with us and she was obviously bothered and conflicted. I said it was ok if she wanted to sit with him. Pretty sure they hooked up after that.

I realized then that people tell me who they are and what they want openly and loudly. I became aware of the nuances in body language and what they did not say, and especially with women what they had said suggested but did not actually say. Actions became more important than words, certainly much less subjective.

2. Salesmanship affects every aspect of our life. Job acceptance, mate selection, stock promotion, purchases, life decisions. All people respond if they buy into any idea that is good for them and creates satisfaction and reduces worry. My job is to get value for every dollar or effort put forth.

 

[starry night]

At age 3 or 4...

My early and long-standing epiphany (which still relates to my FIRE inclinations and countenance) was given to us as children.
We were given a small weekly allowance (a quarter for my older brother, a dime for 3- or 4-yo me, nickel for baby brother).
We were told that it was ours to do with as we wished. We could “spend it, save it, or lose it”. We would not receive any more until next allowance day so don’t ask for an advance, a loan or a replacement.
I learned that my dime would buy a coloring book, but I would have to save my dime over a few weeks to afford the 25-cent box of crayons.
It all worked out, with incremental gains. My fiscal responsibility meant I later advanced to a quarter for allowance, then the opportunity to earn money for extra work (certain chores were a family duty, not for remuneration other than the room and board, transportation and other amenities accruing to me as a family member in good standing).
So, after all these years, it has continued to work out, just as I imagine it has for many of you.

 

[braumeister]

True in my experience. Over the course of my legal career, I questioned literally hundreds of witnesses, under oath, either in the courtroom or at a deposition. Every single one of them lied to me at least once, sometimes about the most trivial of things.

Whenever I have served on a jury, that was the first thing we all agreed on -- our job was to figure out which side's witnesses were lying less than the other.

 

[target2019]

True in my experience. Over the course of my legal career, I questioned literally hundreds of witnesses, under oath, either in the courtroom or at a deposition. Every single one of them lied to me at least once, sometimes about the most trivial of things. How do I know? Because, if I asked a question, it was likely (approaching 100% probability if I was asking in court) that I already knew the answer based on documents or other witnesses.

It's become my mantra. Helps me shake off things quicker, and try to negotiate.
In any given situation I say nothing, and wait for the first lie to emanate from the other person. Then I temper my lie for appropriate benefit. It's not always about money either.

I can understand in court how it would be tempting. I suppose I never ran my life this way. It's a sad truth I finally admitted in the last year or so. Everybody lies, get over it!

 

[latexman]

At some point between University and 5-10 years of MegaCorp, my epiphany was no one ever gets finished with it all. New projects come along before old projects are finished. Before items on to-do lists get striked through, two more are added to the list. Chores are never ending. That's life! It was at this time that I purposely re-invented how I did things, because goals and "finishing something" came infrequently, and I found my self too stressed out and anxious most of the time. So I focused on the journey and the process. I was much more happy when I was learning, growing, and then teaching. So I "became" what I was supposed to be, at home, work, and in life. And, I was happier every day, instead of occaisionally, when goals were accomplished.

 

[pacergal]

I was just reading the thread on what are introvert hobbies and it reminded me about how I learned I didn't actually hate people, I was just an introvert.

I remember when I was in my late 20s and read an article that described an introvert vs an extrovert.
An introvert = a person that recharges themselves by spending time alone
an extrovert = a person that recharges themselves by spending time around other people.
Nothing more, nothing less.

This to me was a life game changer. I always wondered why I couldn't be around people even good friends for too long. I always thought there was something wrong with me.

What was your greatest epiphany?

The value of time.

The variance of wealth between people is vast, but the time not so much. Hundreds of billions vs pocket jingle. However length of life, not so much. 100 years is a long life, but even homeless people can make it to 60 easy.

So I've tried to use my time doing things that I liked to do and wanted to do. Things I enjoyed and made me happy. Start every day with a smile and a sense of adventure and excitement. Because I just don't have time to be miserable.

Both of these.
Along with the notion of "enough"
We are blessed to most likely have "more than enough" now, but I am happy that the majority of my life, enough was plenty.

 

[ivinsfan]

I didn't know I'd fall in love with our first grandchild from the get go. Babies are not my favorite stage. At 7 months, he's got me. I could just hold or watch him play 24/7.
I think I fell in love with our own two children around age two. Working FT and raising babies is not for the weak.

Perhaps it is because I don't actually have 24-7 responsibility for grand.

I think the actual word you are hunting for is enjoy. Pretty sure you love your own kids from the get go, but enjoying a baby while working is a big ask! Now enjoying a grandkid from birth yes that's how it works.

 

[livingalmostlarge]

DH's gradauate advisor said "follow your passion everything else will follow." He meant not just in career but in life. He married the woman he said he would and still is married to her and won a nobel prize. It was to let grad students who hated what they were doing feel okay to leave and go do something else. He moved and everywhere it lead him it was good.

It took us awhile but we did the same and it's paid us back in spades.

 

[Sunset]

What was my greatest epiphany?

Everybody lies.

I don't believe you !