I (*gasp*) drank a can of diet Pepsi yesterday.
To put that in perspective, it's the first soda I've had in at least two years-- probably longer. These days I usually drink water or iced tea and we rarely even buy soda for kids & guests, let alone for personal consumption. I stopped drinking soda five years ago when I retired and I don't have any cravings or longings for it. Now it just tastes too sweet, it's too fizzy, and it's not something I can chug all day (like water) when I'm surfing or sweating.
But I was doing errands down on Subase and I ran into an old shipmate. We were sitting on a shaded lanai surrounded by the smells & noises-- hot concrete/asphalt, salt water slapping the pilings, rubber fenders scraping the piers, diesel fuel & engines, clanging metal & tools, uniforms bustling around everywhere. It was literally stinkin' hot around us, my eyes were squinting from the glare, and we were talking about how the Navy's gone to hell in a handbasket much things have changed since we retired. (He's a contractor at my last command and things aren't going well so the conversation was punctuated by tears of laughter.) In short it pretty much replicated my typical sea-duty inport workdays when I'd be topside bitching about a problem getting ready to head home. In those days I drove a car without A/C so I occasionally bought a cold soda can from the machine to drink on the way. I can't tell you why I didn't keep a cooler or a frozen bottle in the car-- the occasional guilty pleasure of a cold can from the machine was just the default back then.
I said aloha to Wilson, walked toward the car, and found myself putting a dollar bill into the soda machine (hey, where's my change?!?). It felt just right, cold & biting, and half the can's contents were gone by the time I hit the gate outbound. We'd chatted for a long time so I was driving home in rush-hour traffic for the first time in months. Of course I didn't have to race to pick up my kid at the after-school program or get home to start dinner, but I could even feel the same sense of pressure to maneuver through the traffic. That weird time-travel experience lasted all the way to the garage and I even felt a bit guilty when I tossed the empty into the recycle bin.
I've been to that same location numerous times since ER and I never had this experience before. It must've been the combination of sitting around the ambiance, enjoying the conversation, and falling into an old groove. This morning it's over-- I don't have any interest in cold diet Pepsi. I think it was all the environment and unsubconscious behavior.
I wonder if this is how smokers start up again or alcoholics fall off the wagon.
To put that in perspective, it's the first soda I've had in at least two years-- probably longer. These days I usually drink water or iced tea and we rarely even buy soda for kids & guests, let alone for personal consumption. I stopped drinking soda five years ago when I retired and I don't have any cravings or longings for it. Now it just tastes too sweet, it's too fizzy, and it's not something I can chug all day (like water) when I'm surfing or sweating.
But I was doing errands down on Subase and I ran into an old shipmate. We were sitting on a shaded lanai surrounded by the smells & noises-- hot concrete/asphalt, salt water slapping the pilings, rubber fenders scraping the piers, diesel fuel & engines, clanging metal & tools, uniforms bustling around everywhere. It was literally stinkin' hot around us, my eyes were squinting from the glare, and we were talking about how the Navy's gone to hell in a handbasket much things have changed since we retired. (He's a contractor at my last command and things aren't going well so the conversation was punctuated by tears of laughter.) In short it pretty much replicated my typical sea-duty inport workdays when I'd be topside bitching about a problem getting ready to head home. In those days I drove a car without A/C so I occasionally bought a cold soda can from the machine to drink on the way. I can't tell you why I didn't keep a cooler or a frozen bottle in the car-- the occasional guilty pleasure of a cold can from the machine was just the default back then.
I said aloha to Wilson, walked toward the car, and found myself putting a dollar bill into the soda machine (hey, where's my change?!?). It felt just right, cold & biting, and half the can's contents were gone by the time I hit the gate outbound. We'd chatted for a long time so I was driving home in rush-hour traffic for the first time in months. Of course I didn't have to race to pick up my kid at the after-school program or get home to start dinner, but I could even feel the same sense of pressure to maneuver through the traffic. That weird time-travel experience lasted all the way to the garage and I even felt a bit guilty when I tossed the empty into the recycle bin.
I've been to that same location numerous times since ER and I never had this experience before. It must've been the combination of sitting around the ambiance, enjoying the conversation, and falling into an old groove. This morning it's over-- I don't have any interest in cold diet Pepsi. I think it was all the environment and unsubconscious behavior.
I wonder if this is how smokers start up again or alcoholics fall off the wagon.
