Childhood memories about money

[travelover]

.......I try to do the same with our two teenage boys-- they both work at various jobs. My 13 year old is a paintball referee on the weekends and my 15 year old is a bus boy at a local high end restaurant. They both wanted jobs so they could buy what they wanted without having to ask me for money. I guess they figured the jobs would be easier-- I'm pretty Scroogy.

Good for you. Long after they have forgotten quadratic equations, they will remember what they learned from those jobs - like how to save, to prioritize spending and to take responsibility.

 

[steve88]

Mom and dad were both school teachers when my sisters and I were young, but we were a family of six so I'm thinking we were lower middle class. Mom quit teaching after my oldest sister was born, so my dad started driving a bus and teaching swimming lessons to bring in some more income.

In the early 1970s we moved to a small rural town in South Texas to be near my maternal grandmother. My grandfather had passed away and grandmother needed help running the family business. My grandfather was a successful mechanical engineer at GE for years-- then they moved back to grandmother's small Texas hometown and opened a Chevrolet dealership in the 1940s. The business was successful but not huge by any stretch, but grandmother was not able to run it so she turned to my dad for help.

I'm thinking we moved to upper middle class level during this period, but we always lived very frugally. Rented an old two story plantation style house with no A/C for years from a little old lady, and she kept a bedroom in the house and lived with us for years. She finally sold my parents the house, and we/they lived there until the mid 1990s when my parents retired and moved to the hill country. One sister and her family currently live in the old house. It was, and still is, a great old house. I remember having to paint that house with my dad during the summers every few years. He and I would come home from work, (I washed cars, swept floors, and "gophered" during the summers) eat an early dinner, then we grabbed the paintbrushes and painted until dark.

During college I remember my mom telling me to write letters instead of calling on the phone because phone calls were too expensive, so even when they were making good money they remained frugal. I try to do the same with our two teenage boys-- they both work at various jobs. My 13 year old is a paintball referee on the weekends and my 15 year old is a bus boy at a local high end restaurant. They both wanted jobs so they could buy what they wanted without having to ask me for money. I guess they figured the jobs would be easier-- I'm pretty Scroogy.

how does one work before the age of 16? I didn't thik it was legal

 

[cardude]

how does one work before the age of 16? I didn't thik it was legal

You can work if under 16 but the hours are restricted. No more than 3 hours on a school day and no more than 8 hours per day on weekends.

 

[haha]

how does one work before the age of 16? I didn't thik it was legal

In the 70s almost every strawberry commercially harvested in WA was picked by 12-14 year old kids. The 15 years olds were driving the tractor, or driving a pea truck. One of my sons started computer consulting when he was 12.

Ha

 

[NW-Bound]

Really? Does any kid do that anymore, taking time off from their PC and smartphones? Or they do not hire kids anymore?

Here, after an early-teen girl who delivered newspapers got abducted and murdered in an apartment complex while her mother was waiting in a nearby car, they switched to adult deliverers. That was more than 20 years ago.

 

[haha]

Really?

No, not really. I was lying through my teeth.

Ha

 

[NW-Bound]

I think I have seen a photo of you with your teeth.

Not questioning you but to show astonishment. I guess the kids got outworked by adult illegal immigrants.

 

[Nords]

Really? Does any kid do that anymore, taking time off from their PC and smartphones? Or they do not hire kids anymore?

Our daughter got her work permit on the morning that she turned 14 years old, and one of the first things she bought with her own money was a pay-as-you-go cell phone.

She used to work at a Kumon franchise; two weekday afternoons (about 3-4 hours each) and Saturday morning. When she turned 16 I think she ramped up to about 15 hours/week. She still puts in a few hours when she's home from college-- she remembers how she used to look up to those big college kids, and now she's livin' the dream.

One of the great things about those Kumon years was maxing our her Roth IRA.

 

[NW-Bound]

My daughter worked as a restaurant hostess when she was 16. She spent most of her earnings though. My son did the same at a little later age, and managed to save the money for later spending in college.

The newspaper routes for early teens are gone though, as I explained earlier about the terrible crime that occurred more than 20 years ago.

 

[bbbamI]

I have bad childhood memories about money.

Living in houses where snow and rain would come through the roof. Not enough food in the house until my dad got a job working at a grocery store. The guilt I felt when I broke my glasses and had to have them replaced. Worried when I heard mom and dad talk about trying to make ends meet. Children at a young age understand 'adult talk' better than people think they do. ...at least that's the way I was.

Although growing up was hard sometimes, my parents did the best they could.

I learned the value of a dollar. ...and saved as many of them as I could.

Being FIRE'd is a dream come true.

 

[haha]

I have bad childhood memories about money.

Living in houses where snow and rain would come through the roof. Not enough food in the house until my dad got a job working at a grocery store. The guilt I felt when I broke my glasses and had to have them replaced. Worried when I heard mom and dad talk about trying to make ends meet. Children at a young age understand 'adult talk' better than people think they do. ...at least that's the way I was.

Although growing up was hard sometimes, my parents did the best they could.

I learned the value of a dollar. ...and saved as many of them as I could.

Being FIRE'd is a dream come true.

I am sorry that you have these painful memories, but glad your experiences have helped you achieve an important goal of being secure.

My Grandmother used to nod toward me and say to my Mother, "little pitchers have big ears". She was certainly right, as you pointed out.

Ha

 

[Ronstar]

i mowed several lawns around the neighborhood as a youngster. Also worked in a bait shop, and cleaned the city library through high school. I put the money in a savings account that got me through high school and two years of college before I had to go out and make some money to survive. I remember my grandmother telling me "Don't forget this - never quit your job until you have another one lined up". I didn't forget what she said - to the point that I still wonder if it's safe to fully retire.

 

[cardude]

My daughter worked as a restaurant hostess when she was 16. She spent most of her earnings though. My son did the same at a little later age, and managed to save the money for later spending in college.
.

My kids are also spending almost all of their income as well. My youngest boy is addicted to paintball and he is constantly buying and upgrading his equipment. I've had multiple FI talks with them but at 13 and 15 it's not really sinking in. My 15 yo has an old jeep he is fixing up for when he gets his license at 16, so that's where his money is going.

My FI talks attempt to explain how you need to work hard and save like crazy for the first 20 years or so. That way you don't have to put up with a job you no longer like, or maybe a bad boss you can't stand. If you are FI you can either stop working for awhile and go travel or whatever, or switch to a job that may pay less but is enjoyable. I'll keep working on them. I feel like they need an extra dose of reality since we live in the fancy neighborhood, private schools, etc. I also explain that we didn't move to this hood until we were completely FI-- we lived in a small house in the country for the first 20 years. I feel like I have to constantly remind them of this.

 

[FANOFJESUS]

My father opened a saving account for me soon after birth. Then he saved all the money that was given to me in that account. Later he taught me about CD's when the amount got bigger. He always called money that was given to me my son's money not his money. Later on as a 10 year old I was a long way ahead of other kid's my age. This motivated me to keep saving like crazy. Started working about age 12 cutting grass and delivering papers. Started working at a restaurant at age 16. Bought first car at age 18 with cash. I did poor in school because of a learning problem but for my age at the bank I was close to the top.

 

[Finance Dave]

Opened a savings account at a nearby bank at age 12, dad started with $5 for me. Brother and I opened grass-cutting business at that time, had 12 jobs which we split. We did not receive allowance...but could earn money by doing "extra" jobs around the house if we asked dad. Had saved $425 by the time I was 15, used much of that to buy a bicycle...which I still ride today at age 50.

As for "necessities", my dad would give us a certain amount (parents were divorced, lived with dad) for things like school clothes. The "basic" jeans and tennis shoes were about $10 a pair...he said if you want fancier ones, you pay the difference....had to work for it.

He taught us that if you take care of the things you have, you spend less money buying new/replacement items...a valuable lesson. This is why I still have the bicycle today...who needs a 21-speed bike? LOL

 

[Exterous]

I got severely mixed messages when I was young as my mother and father were polar opposites when it came to money. My father's parents went through the Great Depression and it made a huge impact on them. Woe to the person who took more food than they could eat on Thanksgiving (or any other time). My grandfather on that side died when I was still quite young. I knew he had owned a service station and that after that my grandma moved into a small 1 bedroom apartment. My father was extremely frugal - to the point that both my sister and I thought we were poor.

My mother grew up with house where her dad was a doctor and her mom never needed to work. They had a nice house and a second, vacation house. They were not nearly as frugal.

This lead to a lot of fighting over money between my parents and a sporadic financial education for my sister and me. My dad was very strict about how and when we could earn and spend money. My mother was just the opposite and argued that we should get at least some allowance without having to do chores. Neither really talked to me about money or finances other than vague 'always save' messages from my dad. All I knew is that we seemed to live in a nice house in a nice area but that it was filled with 'old' cars and hand-me-down-furniture. (They still have a couch that is older than they are and most of the rest is older than I am)

In college I got into a little bit of financial problems with my first credit card. Nothing big, just something I knew my father would not approve of but still not putting all the pieces together as to why. I was lucky enough to know to start saving into a 401(k) at my earliest opportunity simply because I knew, in some way, it was good and expected.

It wasn't until about 5 years ago that I really started putting all the puzzle pieces together. Some was driven from a dislike of the daily grind and working for others (If I am not INTJ then we at least have much in common) and a desire to exit as soon as possible. Some was from the general lessons learned from my father. Some was from the realization that my GP on my father's side ended up leaving an inheritance for their children while the Doctor on my mother's side (who I thought lived a much better life) left unpaid and hidden debts.

My mom would spend too freely but my dad would be so LBYM that I don't think he'd ever have any fun in life but now they provide a good balance for eachother.

As for me - this dichotomy is something I struggle with internally from time to time. Hopefully I am able to bring a good balance of savings and enjoyment to my family While not relayed in the best way I am very thankful that my parents imparted their wisdom and knowledge to my and realize that not everyone is so lucky.

For anyone else reading this I would strongly encourage a more open discourse about money with your children and the reasons behind your financial decisions