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Financial "Success/Secrets" you only share with strangers but not families/friends
08-02-2022, 11:29 PM
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#1
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Nov 2020
Location: So Cal
Posts: 108
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Financial "Success/Secrets" you only share with strangers but not families/friends
What are some of the financial "Success/Secrets" you can only share with strangers here but not families/friends because the risk of envy, jealousy or unwanted attention. For me, that is: I made $4m last year. I am hella happy about it but it seems socially unacceptable to share that with friends or even relatives because it will always appear as 'showing off' somehow...
What's yours?
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08-03-2022, 05:51 AM
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#2
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 1,516
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We don't share any financial info with friends or family. Nobody knows our net worth.
Folks can see that we are both retired in our mid-fifties, but no details are given.
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08-03-2022, 06:12 AM
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#3
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: St. Louis
Posts: 1,545
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HawaiiShrimp
What are some of the financial "Success/Secrets" you can only share with strangers here but not families/friends because the risk of envy, jealousy or unwanted attention. For me, that is: I made $4m last year. I am hella happy about it but it seems socially unacceptable to share that with friends or even relatives because it will always appear as 'showing off' somehow...
What's yours?
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If you shared that with my relatives they would want $4m it is that simple. They would not view it as showing off but happy you told them.
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08-03-2022, 06:30 AM
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#4
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 1,422
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mrfeh
We don't share any financial info with friends or family. Nobody knows our net worth.
Folks can see that we are both retired in our mid-fifties, but no details are given.
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Same here. Although we are now in our mid 60's.
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08-03-2022, 06:31 AM
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#5
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,294
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Why would I share financial information with a stranger? In fact, I make some effort to cloak it. Much of our charitable donations are done anonymously -- especially to local charities. I do not use a local estate lawyer and don't bank locally.
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08-03-2022, 06:36 AM
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#6
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 12,324
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jebmke
Why would I share financial information with a stranger? In fact, I make some effort to cloak it. Much of our charitable donations are done anonymously -- especially to local charities. I do not use a local estate lawyer and don't bank locally.
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+1
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08-03-2022, 07:24 AM
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#7
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 802
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HawaiiShrimp
What are some of the financial "Success/Secrets" you can only share with strangers here but not families/friends because the risk of envy, jealousy or unwanted attention. For me, that is: I made $4m last year. I am hella happy about it but it seems socially unacceptable to share that with friends or even relatives because it will always appear as 'showing off' somehow...
What's yours?
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income, savings rate, and net worth are best kept quiet in the real life
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08-03-2022, 07:43 AM
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#8
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Des Moines
Posts: 1,174
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I don't really have any success secrets, we did it the slow boring way and I don't really discuss this with anyone. I help my Mom and sis with their money matters so we talk in general.
__________________
Retired in 2013 and we are living the dream!
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08-03-2022, 07:45 AM
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#9
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Just north of the 41st parallel
Posts: 14,743
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I don't have financial success, so I have no financial success secrets.
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08-03-2022, 07:53 AM
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#10
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Twin Cities
Posts: 3,237
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It is a great paradox, isn’t it, HawaiiShrimp? From the Jamestown Colony’s founding in 1603, this whole society was set up for people to make money. We dress up the folklore with the supposed religious freedom exercised by the utterly intolerant, later Plymouth Colony, but this place was founded for people to have a chance to get rich. Can we talk about it when someone actually does? Oh, no. Can’t do that.
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08-03-2022, 08:03 AM
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#11
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 5,082
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When you look relatively young and you aren’t working, its hard to hide your early retirement success. I have only had one person ask for more details, an older brother and when I told him what we had, he got real quiet. Most don’t ask or likely care. All that matters is our personal well being and contentment.
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08-03-2022, 08:11 AM
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#12
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 4,646
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HawaiiShrimp
What are some of the financial "Success/Secrets" you can only share with strangers here but not families/friends because the risk of envy, jealousy or unwanted attention. For me, that is: I made $4m last year. I am hella happy about it but it seems socially unacceptable to share that with friends or even relatives because it will always appear as 'showing off' somehow...
What's yours?
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Most folks here use the "Share Your FIRE Milestones" thread for items like this  .
__________________
FIREd date: June 26, 2018 - "This Happy Feeling, Going Round and Round!" (GQ)
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08-03-2022, 08:28 AM
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#13
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2013
Location: ATL --> Flyover Country
Posts: 6,268
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jebmke
Why would I share financial information with a stranger? In fact, I make some effort to cloak it. Much of our charitable donations are done anonymously -- especially to local charities. I do not use a local estate lawyer and don't bank locally.
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+1000. I am a firm believer and a member of the church of "stealth wealth"
__________________
FIRE'd in 2014 @ 40 Years Old
Professional Retiree
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08-03-2022, 08:34 AM
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#14
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 286
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"I talk about money, but not the amount" - a billionaire once told me this.
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08-03-2022, 08:34 AM
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#15
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: S. California
Posts: 653
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We are discreet with all but our oldest DD, as she is laser focused on FIRE, and already ahead of where we were at her age, and loves talking financial strategies more than almost any other topic. But crickets anywhere else.
We had a pretty awful and awkward moment when we bought our current home a few years back. After escrow closed, the listing agent blanketed the neighborhood with postcards announcing that our house had closed for all cash. As if that were somehow a reflection of her stellar selling abilities? So p#ssed about that. Still p#ssed actually, though I'm sure it's been long forgotten by the neighbors.
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08-03-2022, 08:35 AM
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#16
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Santa Paula
Posts: 3,740
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One day we showed up in our park with 2 new cars. Someone made a comment, and I mumbled something about car payments. In truth, this was the first car in DW's life that she did not have to make car payments on.
I have been gifting our 4 sons the max (16K) each. They have to be really dense when they know I am gifting $64K a year.
__________________
Retired Jan 2009 Have not looked back.
AA 60/35/5 considering SS and pensions a SP annuity
WR 2% with 2SS & 2 Pensions
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08-03-2022, 08:43 AM
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#17
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 4,687
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We view it like we view faith.
It is very personal. We see no reason to share it with anyone. We do not wear it on our sleeve.
Retired in our 50's
Our lifestyle does not reflect our net worth. That is how we like it. Neither of our children have a clue. If they did......
No secrets. Mostly a common sense approach to living, spending, investing, and reaching out to grab opportunities that pass in front of us.
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08-03-2022, 08:47 AM
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#18
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: S. California
Posts: 653
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Souschef
I have been gifting our 4 sons the max (16K) each. They have to be really dense when they know I am gifting $64K a year.
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Isn't the max actually twice that for a couple? Not saying you need to, BTW - just clarifying.
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08-03-2022, 08:50 AM
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#19
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2013
Location: ATL --> Flyover Country
Posts: 6,268
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Souschef
One day we showed up in our park with 2 new cars. Someone made a comment, and I mumbled something about car payments. In truth, this was the first car in DW's life that she did not have to make car payments on.
I have been gifting our 4 sons the max (16K) each. They have to be really dense when they know I am gifting $64K a year.
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Yet you still gift them money?
__________________
FIRE'd in 2014 @ 40 Years Old
Professional Retiree
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08-03-2022, 08:50 AM
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#20
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,294
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Souschef
One day we showed up in our park with 2 new cars. Someone made a comment, and I mumbled something about car payments. In truth, this was the first car in DW's life that she did not have to make car payments on.
I have been gifting our 4 sons the max (16K) each. They have to be really dense when they know I am gifting $64K a year.
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The sons or the strangers in the park?
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