Do we need Facebook in ER?

[BigMoneyJim]

I'm more or less into Twitter but find myself not logging into FB to avoid people. I turned chat so I'm always "offline", so I guess that's not a valid excuse anymore, but it's the habit I'm in.

I first signed up for a cute girl I met while traveling, and then a bunch of people I used to sort of know found me. At first it seemed cool, but I don't really have anything to say to any of them, and I feel restricted in what I might post because they are politically and religiously nothing like me. I haven't defriended a bunch of people so far because it feels somehow rude.

Perhaps I can dig into the permissions and post only for certain groups, but that seems tedious, and twice since I've been on Facebook they've made changes compelling me to go update my security settings to my liking...er, less to my disliking, perhaps.

On the other hand FB indirectly improved relations between our somewhat recently divided extended family. Adding each other as friends was analogous to running into them in a public place and cordially saying "hi". I was scanning some family photos one weekend and put them up on FB, and somehow that sparked some renewed family ties.

One of FB's founder's goals was to map real life relationships, so I don't trust them at all. On the other hand, that ship may have sailed already with web ads that track you and shopping cards and credit and debit cards.

I have made a couple of FB groups for reading purposes. I don't care about most of the drivel my "friends" post, so I put family in one group, but I named it something arbitrary so it wasn't obvious it was a group of family.

And now a somewhat radical change of subject: My cousin has a coworker that has multiple fake FB profiles, and apparently this is a big thing, almost like a role-playing game only it's more escapist/voyeuristic fantasy than structured adventure and character-as-in-avatar building. These people get photos off the internet, talk about their (false) homes, (false) real social and daily life. They purport to date, marry and divorce others. It's as if your Sim has a FB page, only more involved. Weird.

 

[jIMOh]

It depends on the life you lead and what interests you...

I have family and friends which are all 200-500 miles away, and twin boys which are in lots of pictures. FB is a fast, convenient way of sharing that information (better than email).

If I send pictures in an email, it is taking up file space on everyone's server, so most likely a couple photos get viewed via email, then the email is deleted... if I post them to FB, others can see them any time, and there is a good history of photos from day 1 to present.

I check FB 2-3 times per day most days. I have CNN and some news stations which post to my newsfeed, so I don't need to look far to find the news of the day- most of the time.

However if the people which are important to you are around you every day, it is a communication method worth exploring.

Social media like FB will replace social emailing, but it won't replace the emails I get about banking, bills and investment (for example).

 

[Sarah in SC]

For those whose news feeds are clogged up with unwanted info about babies, lunches, parties, etc--just mouse over to the right of offender's post (this also includes any of those stupid FB game updates) and click on hide annoying person or hide annoying application.
Whoosh--away they go. You can keep them as friends, but you don't have to read their every missive. You can still go to their page to catch up, but it isn't in your face every day. I do this with friends who post too much religious stuff, or too much political stuff, or worst of all...too much baby stuff! Ugh!

 

[FUEGO]

Gee Fuego, get going on fluffing up that list or you'll miss being one of the cool kids...

Wow, your facebook friend count is about to break 300. Guess I'm not very popular...

Or maybe I'm focused on quality instead of quantity.

 

[rescueme]

No friends, no family, no FB...

I understand where it could be useful for those in "normal" situations; however I truly have no need for it.

I've done a FB search on my surname and the folks on it are all under the age of 30, and also in another country (from which my four grandparents emigrated from). There is nobody posting in English (but I'm sure those folks do speak the language).

I have no strong feelings to "find my roots" nor connect with some long-lost family "tree", at all...

 

[donheff]

I joined facebook ONLY because the charity group I'm a board member of decided to set up a page.

I did the same. But now I like FB. In addition to family and old acquaintances it is an easy way to keep track of organizations I am interested in. You don't have to friend every random person who contacts you. I simply fail to respond to friend requests from people I don't know or am unsure about. A few people I friended who spew out enough boring BS to put you to sleep are still "friends" but I set FB to ignore their posts.

 

[Sarah in SC]

Wow, your facebook friend count is about to break 300. Guess I'm not very popular...

Or maybe I'm focused on quality instead of quantity.

Whatever, you are just jealous of my cool kid status.
And you are obviously not focused on quality if you have me as a friend!
Did you see the video of my DH skeet shooting where they got bored and started shooting each other instead (with the clays, not the guns)? Very funny, in a stupid southern man sort of way.

 

[FUEGO]

Whatever, you are just jealous of my cool kid status.
And you are obviously not focused on quality if you have me as a friend!
Did you see the video of my DH skeet shooting where they got bored and started shooting each other instead (with the clays, not the guns)? Very funny, in a stupid southern man sort of way.

No skeet shooting vids that I can see. You must have me on the "annoying people" list with limited access to view your feeds! I have a hard time navigating to find videos, so that could be the problem as well...

I did see more info and a link to the mototaxi junket. Something I am interested in (even though I'll probably never do it). Just another example how facebook increases the rate of serendipitous discoveries. One aspect of facebook that I find appealing is that all of my own friends are linked to me somehow. And when they post or share things (pics, vids, links, news articles, groups or organizations they like), there is a higher likelihood that I will find these things interesting (since I share something in common with all of my FB friends by definition).

 

[audreyh1]

Facebook is not for me. Although the local state park posts info on it sometimes and I follow there stuff. I don't care to have my personal information on FB.

We use iChat to talk to family members in real time (instant messaging) and we can switch to video chats whenever we want. That's how we keep track of my brother's family and his new baby in Amsterdam. All my immediate family members (except one) have Macs and we see each other pop up as "being on line" all the time.

Audrey

 

[Nords]

I've been using Facebook for about three months now. The only reason I care is because it's a way to keep in touch with my daughter, and by far the best marketing tool for the book.

Once I had my daughter show me the ropes, I learned a few things:
- If you want to keep in touch with your progeny's progress (or lack thereof) you better ask them nicely to "friend" you so that you can read their wall. Otherwise you'll probably never hear from them again (unless they need money).
- With one exception, now I know why I haven't kept in touch with my high-school classmates.
- I don't know about you other Facebook public figures, but I'm getting a significant number of "friends" requests from [-]busty[/-] comely young lasses who apparently have nothing better to do than photograph themselves naked. I guess it's a different sort of public exposure but they seem to be attracting a crowd of military, er, "friends" who might also be interested in buying the book. I just have to figure out a way to make this cross-marketing work for all of us.

When I'm done with vicariously enjoying my daughter's life and no longer marketing things on Facebook, then I'll probably stop using the account.

 

[DeborahB]

I've been using Facebook for about three months now. The only reason I care is because it's a way to keep in touch with my daughter, and by far the best marketing tool for the book.

Once I had my daughter show me the ropes, I learned a few things:
- If you want to keep in touch with your progeny's progress (or lack thereof) you better ask them nicely to "friend" you so that you can read their wall. Otherwise you'll probably never hear from them again (unless they need money).
- With one exception, now I know why I haven't kept in touch with my high-school classmates.
- I don't know about you other Facebook public figures, but I'm getting a significant number of "friends" requests from [-]busty[/-] comely young lasses who apparently have nothing better to do than photograph themselves naked. I guess it's a different sort of public exposure but they seem to be attracting a crowd of military, er, "friends" who might also be interested in buying the book. I just have to figure out a way to make this cross-marketing work for all of us.

When I'm done with vicariously enjoying my daughter's life and no longer marketing things on Facebook, then I'll probably stop using the account.

If you're getting friend requests from naked women, you probably don't have your privacy controls set to where only your friends can see your info.

Gee, maybe I should try getting same from naked men...?

 

[REWahoo]

If you're getting friend requests from naked women, you probably don't have your privacy controls set to where only your friends can see your info.

Gee, maybe I should try getting same from naked men...?

I'm going to quote this little gem so you can't go back and delete it once you [-]sober up[/-] have second thoughts...

 

[Sarah in SC]

Damn, I've had not a single naked man try to befriend me on Facebook. Rats!

 

[nphx]

i havent come out of my ER closet... i would opt out of any facebook participation even though i have a seldom used facebook account for privacy reasons

 

[scrabbler1]

I tried FB for about a week last year. I thought it was a huge waste of time and quickly deleted my account. I have no desire to reconnect with anyone from high school or college. In high school, I disliked just about everyone and keep in very occasional touch with two people I was friends with. In college, I have been happy to fall out of touch with the few people I kept in touch with over the years.

I don't stay in regular contact with most of my relatives, as they live far away and nearly all got married and had kids, neither of which I have done or ever plan to. I surely don't want to be inundated with progress reports on their kids. I see my one brother's one kid once a year and that is plenty for me.

Only one former coworker I stay in touch with since I ERed 2 years ago, but not very often. A few others I email once in a while which is plenty for me.

My friends, including my ladyfriend, and hobbies are local and require face-to-face gatherings. I do phone, email, and IM them as needed.

Call me a holdout or antisocial, but I have no use for FB. If you are not part of my life already, I don't want you trying to find me, and I won't be trying to find you!

 

[Westernskies]

Damn, I've had not a single naked man try to befriend me on Facebook. Rats!

Check your PM...

 

[DeborahB]

Damn, I've had not a single naked man try to befriend me on Facebook. Rats!

Aha, not just me...

 

[Nords]

If you're getting friend requests from naked women, you probably don't have your privacy controls set to where only your friends can see your info.

Well, that's the whole point of marketing the book.

I mean not setting the privacy controls. Although there has to be a way that the naked women could market the book too.

Damn, I've had not a single naked man try to befriend me on Facebook. Rats!

It's a good thing that you're a moderator, and that vBulletin doesn't let posters attach photos to their PMs.

Or from your perspective, perhaps it's a bad thing!

 

[DeborahB]

I will confess. After resisting Farmville, my cousin and a cousin of hers (a complicated family relationship) went to work for Zynga and her cousin developed Frontierville - so it became a family thing to try the game. Now I'm unfortunately addicted.

For the non-FB people, these are games played via facebook, quite complex and interactive actually. Frontierville is pretty dumb looking but damn, I've expanded my homestead and have lots of buildings and crops and animals and "stuff"... as you see, addicted. It is fun - at least right now, for me.

Feel free to make fun of me....

 

[Nords]

I will confess.
Feel free to make fun of me....

To paraphrase a famous quote, "This thread is worthless without secret cheat codes"...

 

[obgyn65]

Hello thinker25 - we are in the same boat.

I'm public, I have a public presence through various things I've done. So I am private as much as possible. Possibly a contradiction but I try...

 

[clifp]

I will confess. After resisting Farmville, my cousin and a cousin of hers (a complicated family relationship) went to work for Zynga and her cousin developed Frontierville - so it became a family thing to try the game. Now I'm unfortunately addicted.

For the non-FB people, these are games played via facebook, quite complex and interactive actually. Frontierville is pretty dumb looking but damn, I've expanded my homestead and have lots of buildings and crops and animals and "stuff"... as you see, addicted. It is fun - at least right now, for me.

Feel free to make fun of me....

I love games and hate facebook games, cause they aren't fun, just a huge waste of time. I am still looking forward to the first fun FB game. Obviously tens of millions disagree.

 

[Sarah in SC]

I will confess. After resisting Farmville, my cousin and a cousin of hers (a complicated family relationship) went to work for Zynga and her cousin developed Frontierville - so it became a family thing to try the game. Now I'm unfortunately addicted.

Feel free to make fun of me....

Okay! Nah, actually, I just don't like games of any kind: interpersonal, computer, board, card, etc. Never have. So I happily hide those sorts of updates and live happily ever after. But I can see the entertainment value for those who like them.

 

[Major Tom]

Okay! Nah, actually, I just don't like games of any kind: interpersonal, computer, board, card, etc. Never have. So I happily hide those sorts of updates and live happily ever after. But I can see the entertainment value for those who like them.

I'm in exactly the same boat as you Sarah and was beginning to think I was the only one. When family or friends are playing card games, video games etc, I always sit them out. I feel like a bit of a weirdo, but they hold no interest for me.

As for all these FB games in which you play with other people's pets etc - they look like a big waste of time, though it's hard for me to resist petting a dog or cat in real life

 

[cj]

I joined FB about 2 years ago. I also think a lot of it is a huge waste of time (Farmville? Seriously?), but it is nice to keep up with what my niece and nephews are doing. Otherwise I'd never know!

The real reason I do FB, however, is that I met a group of women online 3 years ago when I was going through treatment for breast cancer. We hooked up at another bc site, and we got really close going through treatment at the same time. After about a year, we moved our entire group to a private FB space. There are about 20 of us (from all over the country), and we keep up with each other there. We've started annual reunions, which we can discuss and plan on FB. We met for the first time in Vegas in 2009, and then again on the east coast in 2010. For groups like ours, Facebook is great!!!