Losing my ambition (that's me in the corner)

[Amethyst]

In my line of work we'd say "Sure, I'll get on that right away."

Sounds like he is encouraging you to do the work while he (or she) rides along for the credit.

"Top delighter" is one of the smarmier bits of workplace jargon I've encountered.

I just got an email from an "associate" (i.e. coworker) talking about "promoting" (i.e. advertising) a "top delighter" (i.e. something that customers like), wondering if I'd want to "author" (i.e. write) a blog about it. He said he could "partner with me" (i.e. work with me) on it.

 

[FIREmenow]

I think there ares some synergies that could be gained if you would benchmark it first, then provide a gap analysis along with the associatd KPI values that are affected. This would really go a long way towards moving the ball downfield.

 

[O2Bfree]

Ok, I'll reach out to him to communicate my buy-in. I have the bandwidth. The article will help us incentivize one of our bleeding-edge disruptive competencies, and help us realize some low-hanging fruit.

 

[omni550]

And don't forget to touch base with him.

 

[O2Bfree]

Sounds like he is encouraging you to do the work while he (or she) rides along for the credit.

You know, it's looking that way. I really don't hear many buzzwords around the office, except from upper-management in quarterly meetings. When I read that email, I nearly LOLed, and got the feeling that something was up with this guy. Sure enough, I had lunch with someone who's been working closely with him, and she said he's taken credit for some of her work. Shields up!

 

[jollystomper]

And don't forget to touch base with him.

Now that's what I call innovative collaboration!

 

[Amethyst]

Ha! And here I was going to suggest that you add him to your funnel.

You know, it's looking that way. I really don't hear many buzzwords around the office, except from upper-management in quarterly meetings. When I read that email, I nearly LOLed, and got the feeling that something was up with this guy. Sure enough, I had lunch with someone who's been working closely with him, and she said he's taken credit for some of her work. Shields up!

 

[ER Eddie]

OP here again. I've started reading a book called My Time, which so far I like quite a bit. She talks about this as a phase of transition, something relatively new to our culture, a challenge/opportunity to redefine yourself. She also talks about it as a "second adolescence," which is a term I like.

I'm not sure I'm "losing my ambition" after all. I may just be in a transitional phase, where my ambition hasn't found new roots yet. I feel the "lostness" and sense of being adrift she talks about, and the restlessness. I also feel my "inner adolescent" coming to the fore, with concerns about identity, goals, meaning...

I have a tendency to want to figure things out in advance, to know where I'm going. But I see now that there will be a period -- maybe many years -- where I will be experimenting, "bumping around," trying things out, and in the process inventing a new life for myself, and perhaps a new self for my self, too. And I won't know what that looks like, until I'm well into the process.

So, my thoughts are provoked. I have been too passive about it, I think, and too eager to embrace the easy, comfortable part of semi-retirement -- the letting up, the taking it easy. That's fine and good, of course, but now I also see how much potential there is in this transitional phase.

It does feel like a second adolescence. I'm trying to sort through major issues about identity and life direction. "What do I want to be when I grow up?" Only this time, I've got a lot more experience and wisdom than I did when I was a teenager.

It's an interesting time.

 

[Scuba]

Enjoy your journey! Sounds like your transition is going well. I think it's great to take time to be introspective rather than just staying busy all the time, especially early in the process. Thanks for your thoughtful post.

 

[Nords]

It does feel like a second adolescence. I'm trying to sort through major issues about identity and life direction. "What do I want to be when I grow up?" Only this time, I've got a lot more experience and wisdom than I did when I was a teenager.

It's an interesting time.

"Growing older is mandatory, growing up is optional."

"You're only young once, but you can be immature for the rest of your life..."

And my personal favorite:
"Not all those who wander are lost." (J.R.R. Tolkein)

 

[Zorba]

I just got an email from an "associate" (i.e. coworker) talking about "promoting" (i.e. advertising) a "top delighter" (i.e. something that customers like), wondering if I'd want to "author" (i.e. write) a blog about it. He said he could "partner with me" (i.e. work with me) on it.

But first, you better make sure you've put the cover page on your TPS report.

 

[JoeWras]

Don't forget to run it by your stakeholders!

With a laser-like focus, of course.

 

[JoeWras]

OP here again. I've started reading a book called My Time, which so far I like quite a bit. She talks about this as a phase of transition, something relatively new to our culture, a challenge/opportunity to redefine yourself. She also talks about it as a "second adolescence," which is a term I like.

I'm not sure I'm "losing my ambition" after all. I may just be in a transitional phase, where my ambition hasn't found new roots yet. I feel the "lostness" and sense of being adrift she talks about, and the restlessness. I also feel my "inner adolescent" coming to the fore, with concerns about identity, goals, meaning...

I have a tendency to want to figure things out in advance, to know where I'm going. But I see now that there will be a period -- maybe many years -- where I will be experimenting, "bumping around," trying things out, and in the process inventing a new life for myself, and perhaps a new self for my self, too. And I won't know what that looks like, until I'm well into the process.

You know, really interesting. I've kind of been rolling a similar idea around in my head ("running it up the flagpole?").

So many of our friends' college graduates are doing the "gap year" thing. (Another buzz word.) Frankly, I'm jealous. Oh wait, maybe I'm not! Time for MY gap year.

I worked by butt off and graduated college in 3 1/2 years with no debt. I saved all my grass cutting money in high school to help pay for college, and took on jobs. I didn't go on spring break vacations. I worked. Blah, blah, blah. Yeah, it got me here to ER (OMY), but it was a tough road.

Time for a gap year or more to "bump around" and try out some things, etc.

 

[Perryinva]

I've generally always enjoyed my work and career. At times, in years past, the hours could get ridiculous, (like 120hr week, 7 days. For 2 weeks), but we got paid for our OT, and it was always appreciated, and satisfiying to watch a complex plant come to life. Now as a more senior "expert", I don't work those hours anymore, and can set my own pace, with many weeks less than 40hrs. But my ambition, career wise has declined. A lot. Or maybe I too, am transitioning. But the reality is that I foolishly (?) always assumed that hard work and great results would mean more success financially and corporately. The reality is that I decided way too late to get on the leadership track to more money. I didn't play the right games or put myself in the right positions. So I just became the person everyone wants to have work for them, rather than being seen as someone that can lead a team to similar successes.

So I am getting close, maybe 2 more OMYs, and then the lines will intersect.

 

[daylatedollarshort]

Some of our friends have started passing away. Some of our older neighbors and people we've met in the senior clubs are becoming mentally or physically disabled. One neighbor we've known for years has Alzheimer's and started introducing himself to us every time we would see him, which sometimes would be 2 - 3 times a week. We've been helping out with some chores for a neighbor with dementia. So seeing that our ambition these days is mainly to have fun, work on our health and get out and do all the day trips that require distance driving and hiking while we still can.

 

[kcowan]

People need to start thinking about OLY, as in one less year to go in life. And that does not include becoming marginally capable.

 

[sengsational]

OP here again. I've started reading a book called My Time, which so far I like quite a bit.

Another book recommendation! I just ordered it on half.com.

- How to Be Idle, by Tom Hodgkinson

- The Importance of Being Lazy, by Al Gini

- Take Back Your Time, by John de Graaf

- The Importance of Being Idle, by Stephen Robins

- Slow is Beautiful, by Cecile Andrews


Tom Hodginson can be a bit extreme, but I like his spirit. Cecile Andrews' book is probably my favorite, although it may not be quite as "on point" as the others. Al Gini's book is precisely on point. He is a professor of leisure, which sounds like a nice job. Take Back Your Time is a good read, focused on reclaiming time from work. I'd put Robins' book at the bottom, since it is made up mostly of quotes from other people, but there are some good thoughts in there about the value of leisure.

I got "Slow is Beautiful" as a borrowed e-Book from the county library, but stalled on it...it was too much about how it was the fault of government policy...at least the first 4 chapters.

The library had "Take Back Your Time" and "How to Be Idle", and I got "The Importance of Being Lazy" on Half.com. I've just read the first few pages of each of the three so far. I've been busy laying plank vinyl in the kitchen, but now that the project is over, I can get back to "proper leisure reading"!

 

[ER Eddie]

So many of our friends' college graduates are doing the "gap year" thing. (Another buzz word.) Frankly, I'm jealous. Oh wait, maybe I'm not! Time for MY gap year.

Time for a gap year or more to "bump around" and try out some things, etc.

I like that idea. Gap year. I wonder if I'd come back after the gap, though? Or would I enjoy it so much, the gap would turn into a canyon?

I got "Slow is Beautiful" as a borrowed e-Book from the county library, but stalled on it...it was too much about how it was the fault of government policy...at least the first 4 chapters.

From my perspective, it was more about the whole culture, the media, and our own psychology, rather than government policy per se. Although, she did have a tendency in that book to periodically go off on George Bush and the Republicans. Kind of odd/funny. I like her, though. Her Circle of Simplicity is one of my favorites.

The library had "Take Back Your Time" and "How to Be Idle", and I got "The Importance of Being Lazy" on Half.com. I've just read the first few pages of each of the three so far. I've been busy laying plank vinyl in the kitchen, but now that the project is over, I can get back to "proper leisure reading"!

Good, you'll probably like at least one of those.

There aren't too many books extolling the virtues of leisure or taking it easy. People who are "into" taking it easy are probably not the type who will go to the trouble of writing a book about leisure. After all, that's a lot of work.

 

[wren007]

ER Eddie - I am right there with you. I work part time with people mostly much younger. Since I have no interest in management and have no desire to work full time again, I seem to be at the peak of my career now. I have also read a lot about minimalism and simplifying which suits me to my core but harder to put in place where I live and with a child at home. My main pursuit (what excites me) now is adventure and traveling but can't do that all the time with a child in school with activities. DH is fully retired and does not seem to have the same internal conflicts that I do.

 

[Out of Steam]

One neighbor we've known for years has Alzheimer's and started introducing himself to us every time we would see him, which sometimes would be 2 - 3 times a week.

The mother of a neighbor did this every time she met me for several years, usually while she was out walking. Eventually, she couldn't find her way back and had to be moved to assisted living.

As 60 approaches, I'm definitely sharing the sense that time is getting short.

 

[DawgMan]

This thread caught my attention as I have been wrestling with many of the same issues. Like many on this site, I have been very goal driven throughout my life. In my case, while I have kept a decent work/life balance, I kept my head down while at work knowing I was supporting a wife and 4 kids as well as pursuing my ER financial goals. Fast forward... 2 kids out and independent (1 married, other about to be) and then 2 others in last 2 yrs of college. As they roll off the payroll there is a little bit of a "loss of purpose/being needed" feeling. "Pulling the sled" all these years gave me a sense of real purpose/responsibility. My plan has always been/is to launch (if I don't chicken out) in about 2 yrs when last kid graduates (age 55)... why, because that is what the "plan" calls for. I don't hate my job, it is very flexible and can be very lucrative, and yes, I could (may) continue working for some years after, but I have hit/surpassed my goals and feel like "this is what you worked so hard for, now you have done it, so do it!". On paper, I have my list of things I (DW & I) want to do and I am sure we will do some of it, however, as said in this thread, I know I will want to find some purpose outside of my own indulgences and nurture relationships with friends and family so hopefully when I am done, I have contributed something to this planet and someone can say "he finished well". I'm trying to obsorb the wisdom of those who have gone before me so hopefully I'm better prepared, but understand at some point, you just need to jump into the pool!

 

[O2Bfree]

People need to start thinking about OLY, as in one less year to go in life. And that does not include becoming marginally capable.

That's right, thanks for the reminder!

 

[Koolau]

This thread caught my attention as I have been wrestling with many of the same issues. Like many on this site, I have been very goal driven throughout my life. In my case, while I have kept a decent work/life balance, I kept my head down while at work knowing I was supporting a wife and 4 kids as well as pursuing my ER financial goals. Fast forward... 2 kids out and independent (1 married, other about to be) and then 2 others in last 2 yrs of college. As they roll off the payroll there is a little bit of a "loss of purpose/being needed" feeling. "Pulling the sled" all these years gave me a sense of real purpose/responsibility. My plan has always been/is to launch (if I don't chicken out) in about 2 yrs when last kid graduates (age 55)... why, because that is what the "plan" calls for. I don't hate my job, it is very flexible and can be very lucrative, and yes, I could (may) continue working for some years after, but I have hit/surpassed my goals and feel like "this is what you worked so hard for, now you have done it, so do it!". On paper, I have my list of things I (DW & I) want to do and I am sure we will do some of it, however, as said in this thread, I know I will want to find some purpose outside of my own indulgences and nurture relationships with friends and family so hopefully when I am done, I have contributed something to this planet and someone can say "he finished well". I'm trying to obsorb the wisdom of those who have gone before me so hopefully I'm better prepared, but understand at some point, you just need to jump into the pool!

Good Post! You may find (as we did) that you are still quite involved in your children's lives. In our case, it's less about day to day "advice" or even baby-sitting, etc., we have done our best to lend a helping hand for things like Roth IRA funding and help with old student loans or house down-payment. YMMV

 

[Cassius King]

I believe I'm just the opposite. As I get older, I'm more ambitious and excited. Early on in life, I had goals and kept busting to put away and achieve those. Now that I can see the fruits of my labor, and it's just not a dream, it's becoming hard reality, I'm more ambitious about my future than ever.
Like was said above, time flies, and each passing day is one less day that you get to achieve and enjoy these dreams.
So yes, I'm much more ambitious and excited with each and every passing day!

 

[bltkmt]

Nothing to say except nice REM play.