Well, I guess life after FIRE starts today

[pullmyfinger]

I quit my job today. It wasn't the way I planned it, but my time line kept getting shorter and shorter. First I wanted to work until next September, then April, then January, then November of this year. I just couldn't do it. A wise former coworker once commented "nurses can take "b***h to a whole new level and unfortunately that has been what I have experienced.

So, today I gave my notice. We are required to give 3 weeks notice to get our vacation paid out (I have very little on the books) and since I am starting vacation tomorrow for 3 weeks I don't have to work there again. I just have to drop by in 3 weeks to turn in my badge to the boss.

My body just couldn't keep going to work. I wouldn't have believed it if it didn't happen to me, but the dread gave way to crushing headaches, insomnia, nausea, dizziness and I honestly twice I thought I would pass out. Perhaps these were panic attacks, but I did eventually get the message loud and clear.

So now what? We have been planning early retirement for years so the financial piece is fine. DH left for a 3 day work trip today (they don't seem to realize he is about to quit also) so I am home alone with the cats. Any ideas to detoxify? I haven't been running for a few days due to the lack of sleep, but I am hoping to start back tomorrow. Thanks for listening.

 

[DFA]

Sounds like it was time to go. My detox was to just relax and let it all just fall away. I would suggest taking some time just to unwind and get your health back on track before jumping into a lot of stuff. I hung out with the dogs and we napped a lot the first couple of days. The best part of life is ahead and I hope it is all you wished for.

 

[RetiredAndFree]

Go for a long walk if you can't bring yourself to run (I'm a long time runner, so I get what running does for detoxing the head, rest assured), then pour yourself a nice glass of wine and drink it. Sounds like you may be in a little bit of shock at the abruptness of it all.

It's great that you are leaving for a long trip. That will give you a nice long time to get the de-stressing project started. It took me a good year and a half to fully wind down.

I'd also highly, highly recommend getting The Joy of Not Working by Ernie Zelinski. It's the best book I have ever read on how to start building a meaningful post-working life that speaks to your specific interests and passions.

Oh, and congratulations!

 

[MBAustin]

Sounds like you are a little apprehensive about starting your new life. A few thoughts:

- Is there something you enjoy doing during the day that is miserable on weekends due to crowds? This is a good time to do it!

- Don't try to make a busy schedule for yourself. You really do need to detox.

- Exercise is always good. As is a nice glass of wine or your favorite adult beverage (after 5:30)

- Making lists of things you want to do now that the big day has come can be helpful. Just don't overload yourself with projects, make sure there is plenty of fun stuff. And doin' nothin' can be a ton of fun!

Congratulations and enjoy!

 

[Moemg]

I was also in Nursing & one day I realized I was burned out and it was time to leave . I gave notice but no one believed me so I finally agreed to take a leave for six months or forever . Well it has been six and a half years . The first few months I just chilled out and slept a lot . Take time to detox then slowly you will form a new non working life.

 

[Walt34]

- Exercise is always good. As is a nice glass of wine or your favorite adult beverage (after 5:30)

Note that he didn't say it had to be 5:30 where you are...

 

[braumeister]

Note that he didn't say it had to be 5:30 where you are...

It's all in how you read it.
Me, I read it as needing to be five minutes and 30 seconds after that post. Not a terribly unreasonable length of time to wait for your adult beverage.

 

[pullmyfinger]

Sounds like it was time to go. My detox was to just relax and let it all just fall away. I would suggest taking some time just to unwind and get your health back on track before jumping into a lot of stuff. I hung out with the dogs and we napped a lot the first couple of days. The best part of life is ahead and I hope it is all you wished for.

Thank you for the kind words. I guess that really all I can do is start to unwind. I'll have to let it run it's course. My cats are always up for naps!

 

[pullmyfinger]

It's all in how you read it.
Me, I read it as needing to be five minutes and 30 seconds after that post. Not a terribly unreasonable length of time to wait for your adult beverage.

Well, since I don't drink alcohol I was thinking something along the lines of a Peanut Buster Parfait at Dairy Queen Something massively indulgent and unnecessary but of course LBYM.

 

[MichaelB]

So now what? We have been planning early retirement for years so the financial piece is fine. DH left for a 3 day work trip today (they don't seem to realize he is about to quit also) so I am home alone with the cats. Any ideas to detoxify? I haven't been running for a few days due to the lack of sleep, but I am hoping to start back tomorrow. Thanks for listening.

Well, you don't have to do anything now. If you do decide to so something, like the local grocer, you can do it when you want, not when you have a free moment. Congratulations on your early retirement, welcome to the rest of your life.

 

[pullmyfinger]

I was also in Nursing & one day I realized I was burned out and it was time to leave . I gave notice but no one believed me so I finally agreed to take a leave for six months or forever . Well it has been six and a half years . The first few months I just chilled out and slept a lot . Take time to detox then slowly you will form a new non working life.

Thank you for your post. I guess tomorrow is the first day of a new life. I've been looking forward to it for several years now, but it still didn't happen the way I'd planned. But at least it is done. I was surprised by how much I was bothered by toxic coworkers while being fully aware that I didn't need to be there. I didn't think it was burnout because I liked the patients (hospice) and the work, and I still did a good job, but good grief I had some nasty coworkers. Well now it is time to look ahead.

 

[omni550]

Welcome to the first day of the best part of your life. Sounds like you've earned it!

omni

 

[pullmyfinger]

Go for a long walk if you can't bring yourself to run (I'm a long time runner, so I get what running does for detoxing the head, rest assured), then pour yourself a nice glass of wine and drink it. Sounds like you may be in a little bit of shock at the abruptness of it all.

It's great that you are leaving for a long trip. That will give you a nice long time to get the de-stressing project started. It took me a good year and a half to fully wind down.

I'd also highly, highly recommend getting The Joy of Not Working by Ernie Zelinski. It's the best book I have ever read on how to start building a meaningful post-working life that speaks to your specific interests and passions.

Oh, and congratulations!

Thank you for your post.

Yes, the abruptness did throw me. I actually snuck out the door at work and asked my supervisor not to make an announcement until after I was gone. I'm just really done. But, I just got back from a walk in my neighborhood and realized that I no longer have to work every other weekend! I won't have to make excuses for cancelling plans with friends because I am too stressed about my upcoming work days.

I have read Ernie Zelinski's books, but it has been several years so perhaps it is time for a refresher.

My vacation is a staycation, which is really perfect, since I can have some downtime. I will be glad when DH comes home on Friday.

 

[pullmyfinger]

Welcome to the first day of the best part of your life. Sounds like you've earned it!

omni

Thank you! Yes, be careful what you wish for!

 

[pullmyfinger]

Well, you don't have to do anything now. If you do decide to so something, like the local grocer, you can do it when you want, not when you have a free moment. Congratulations on your early retirement, welcome to the rest of your life.

Thank you. You have a good point, just like I don't have to be at work now, I guess I don't need to be anywhere or doing anything in particular. It is kind of a strange freefloating feeling.

 

[Pastorm1]

I was in a similar situation working in IT. I quit in June of this this year. I've never felt better. However after 3 months I am thinking I should have tried to get disability or something. Working the system. I hate when you get pushed into a desperate situation. You have a skill that you can always use. If after a while when you decompress and feel like you want to do something, do it on your terms.


Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum

 

[Accidental Retiree]

I quit my job today. It wasn't the way I planned it, but my time line kept getting shorter and shorter. First I wanted to work until next September, then April, then January, then November of this year. I just couldn't do it. A wise former coworker once commented "nurses can take "b***h to a whole new level and unfortunately that has been what I have experienced.

So, today I gave my notice. We are required to give 3 weeks notice to get our vacation paid out (I have very little on the books) and since I am starting vacation tomorrow for 3 weeks I don't have to work there again. I just have to drop by in 3 weeks to turn in my badge to the boss.

My body just couldn't keep going to work. I wouldn't have believed it if it didn't happen to me, but the dread gave way to crushing headaches, insomnia, nausea, dizziness and I honestly twice I thought I would pass out. Perhaps these were panic attacks, but I did eventually get the message loud and clear.

So now what? We have been planning early retirement for years so the financial piece is fine. DH left for a 3 day work trip today (they don't seem to realize he is about to quit also) so I am home alone with the cats. Any ideas to detoxify? I haven't been running for a few days due to the lack of sleep, but I am hoping to start back tomorrow. Thanks for listening.

Good for you and congratulations!

Don't expect too much from yourself just now. Just give yourself time to de-stress.




Sent from my iPhone using Early Retirement Forum

 

[RetiredAndFree]

Pullmyfinger, in addition to what I wrote above, don't be surprised if you experience a wave of emotions in the next few weeks. It's completely normal to find ourselves, surprise, mourning the loss of our 'old' selves, because we don't yet know who our new self will be. It it occurs, which it did to me, even though I was ecstatic to have achieved FIRE and be able to give notice, it should pass within a few days.

 

[pullmyfinger]

Good for you and congratulations!

Don't expect too much from yourself just now. Just give yourself time to de-stress.

Thank you for your kind thoughts. I think I need permission just to be.

 

[pullmyfinger]

Pullmyfinger, in addition to what I wrote above, don't be surprised if you experience a wave of emotions in the next few weeks. It's completely normal to find ourselves, surprise, mourning the loss of our 'old' selves, because we don't yet know who our new self will be. It it occurs, which it did to me, even though I was ecstatic to have achieved FIRE and be able to give notice, it should pass within a few days.

Thank you for those insights. It does feel weird, I am overwhelmingly relieved, but wonder what will come next once that relief passes.

 

[pullmyfinger]

Sounds like you are a little apprehensive about starting your new life. A few thoughts:

- Is there something you enjoy doing during the day that is miserable on weekends due to crowds? This is a good time to do it!

- Don't try to make a busy schedule for yourself. You really do need to detox.

- Exercise is always good. As is a nice glass of wine or your favorite adult beverage (after 5:30)

- Making lists of things you want to do now that the big day has come can be helpful. Just don't overload yourself with projects, make sure there is plenty of fun stuff. And doin' nothin' can be a ton of fun!

Congratulations and enjoy!

Thank you. I have a few things on a list in my head to do tomorrow, but probably the main one is to feed the crows that wait for me in my driveway. Not too ambitious! I have family to call and tell the news but it is only people who are supportive. DH's parents think we should work until we drop dead so we decided that we will not tell them when we quit our jobs, but just give vague answers.

 

[pullmyfinger]

I was in a similar situation working in IT. I quit in June of this this year. I've never felt better. However after 3 months I am thinking I should have tried to get disability or something. Working the system. I hate when you get pushed into a desperate situation. You have a skill that you can always use. If after a while when you decompress and feel like you want to do something, do it on your terms.


Sent from my iPad using Early Retirement Forum

Yes, I really didn't like feeling pushed into a desperate situation either. I felt like I couldn't leave on my terms, but I guess I really still did, but it just happened earlier than I planned. Also sneaking out the door felt strange. One of the reasons we worked some extra years was so that we would never have to go back to work. I'm really done with nursing, but it has definitely given me good life skills. It's sad how many of our jobs turn toxic.

 

[Unpaintedhuffhines]

This is the best thing that could have happened at this point in your life. I left a very stressful job about four months ago, and I think it took me about three months before I was really de-stressed. It really can take a while. Agree with most that has been said here - sleep, read, run, hike, or whatever you like to do, whenever you want to do it.

 

[pullmyfinger]

This is the best thing that could have happened at this point in your life. I left a very stressful job about four months ago, and I think it took me about three months before I was really de-stressed. It really can take a while. Agree with most that has been said here - sleep, read, run, hike, or whatever you like to do, whenever you want to do it.

Wow, thank you for your insights. You are probably right, the situation was not sustainable and I did manage to get out before completely imploding. Now it is time to heal. I'm glad to hear that you are in a better place now as well.

 

[megacorp-firee]

First of all CONGRATS! You now can get on with the rest of your life.

I have been FIREd for 7 years (this last July). I would guess my departure was little more planned then yours, but it is essentially the same. Go ahead and relax. One of the most striking differences that I noticed was how much stress I had been under and did NOT realize it. I now sleep when tired, wake when I am not, busy doing what I want. I am however, busier then ever. I have to actually plan out time for things that must be done, but are not the 'fun' part of life.

Take your time and decompress. Then see what 'rings your bell' and pursue ...
Best of luck to you. ... and go ahead and enjoy life now