I find that in order to maintain the contrast, it's useful to
never forget what it was like to be an employee.
This brings up some interesting questions:
• how can someone appreciate money if they've never been without it?
• how can someone appreciate being a business owner if they've never been an employee?
• how can someone appreciate being a homeowner if they've never been a tenant?
I have distant relatives who have never been without money, never been an employee, and never been a tenant. Oddly, they don't seem overly thrilled with their relatively privileged status. On the contrary, they seem quite adept at finding ways to make themselves miserable.
Yeah, I've enjoyed re-stoking that contrast effect a little, by (for example) reviewing a list I made of reasons to retire. I listed most of the negatives about work, and reading about them helps me remember.
It's strange. Even though it's only been a year, it feels like another world now.
I keep a journal, so I can also re-stoke the contrast effect by reading old entries -- e.g., times when I was going through stressful periods at work.
Another method is to meet up with old work colleagues. They invariably talk about stress and dysfunction in the workplace. A lot of their brain pan is filled with that stuff. I always leave those conversations feeling glad I'm out. I don't give a moment's thought to any of that stuff anymore.
Maybe what I bolded is the difference.
I did not feel "relief" at retirement. I felt like "I have completed a good career, well done". I do not need anything beyond that knowledge.
I like to build things, and for me the satisfaction of what I have built remains every time I view it. My plans, my handiwork - the object might be 40 years old, but I still feel the same satisfaction at completing it, and how it is still being used and enjoyed.
I completed a career that I never expected to have, was paid way more than I expected for a job that was more a hobby than work, gave my family a good life through it, and left behind items that people are still using to do their job and be productive. That type of satisfaction (or "high") never fades.
Our different views may just be based on different attitudes about our careers.
Nope, but that's a good perspective. I feel similarly about my own career, maybe a little less positive, but overall, I take pride and satisfaction in what I accomplished, and I know I made the world a little better. I only mentioned the "relief" angle because someone else talked about it earlier in the thread (he described it as removing a thumbtack from your rear end). It's the flip side of the "high," but it's the same principle.
Like you say, that feeling of "satisfaction over a job well done" does not fade with time. Right, and that's the difference I'm pointing to. An enduring feeling of satisfaction isn't the same as the "high" I'm talking about. The feeling you're referencing existed long before you even retired, and it will continue to exist as long as you're alive. The temporary "high" I'm talking about happens specifically because of the change from work to retirement, and it derives from the contrast between those two conditions. The job or life satisfaction you're talking about doesn't. So, we're just talking about two different things.
My guess is that you didn't experience much of the "high" I'm describing, and so you're finding it hard to understand what I'm talking about. It's like the engineer said above -- the contrast depends on your starting point. If your job and life satisfaction was already high, you aren't going to experience the *bump* necessary for a high (or alternately, for a big sense of relief).
That's a good thing. The "high" is temporary. It's a function of change, of contrast, and of the brain's adaptation to change over time. But really, it's enduring life satisfaction that matters.
This is a very imperfect analogy, but you might think of it as akin to the difference between the intense rush of "falling in love" -- with the chemical soup you are bathed in (dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, all the hormones) -- compared to the enduring enjoyment and satisfaction of a great long-term relationship. The first always fades -- because that's just how the brain works -- but the second continues (or rather, can continue).
This is my fear too. Glad to hear you found it unfounded. In what ways are you more intellectually stimulated now? What are you doing?
Mm. Lots of things. I'll list them, because I like lists, lol.
1. Reading. Lots of reading. Some pretty heavy subjects. Atheism, Christianity, intelligent design, stoicism, the afterlife, psychology. I've always been a reader, but when I was working, a lot of my brain pan was taken up with work-related stuff. I've been reading a lot more, now that I'm retired.
2. OLLI. I now consider OLLI a "must" for any city I would choose to live in retirement (unless they had something else equivalent). Unfortunately, this has been shutdown lately.
3. There's a progressive (?) Christianity book discussion group I attend. It can be stimulating, and some of the reading has really helped clarify things for me. Unfortunately, this is shutdown at the moment.
4. Reviewing and reinforcing my own old ideas, which I've forgotten. I do this through journals. Part of my intellectual stimulation is just reminding myself of thing I've learned but forgotten.
5. Podcasts.
6. I talked about the lure of social media, but there are intellectually stimulating groups out there, too. I've interacted with some pretty interesting and smart people on various platforms -- and plenty of dumb ones, too, lol, but that's stimulating in its own way.
7. Making new friends. This is easier in retirement than when working. I'm just beginning, and it's hard with the shutdown, but meeting new people is always intellectually or at least socially-emotionally stimulating.
8. I'm able to do more writing about subjects that interest me. When I worked, all my writing energy was channeled into my career. Now that energy is freed up, and I'm enjoying the process of writing and blogging.
Overall, I'd say that intellectual stimulation feels much more available to me now than it did when I was working. When I was working, the intellectual stimulation was definitely there, but it was channeled in a pretty narrow and consistent way. I would pursue other interests outside of work, but most of my best mental energy was expended on work projects.
Now that I'm retired, my mind is free to go wherever it wants, and to spend all that energy on whatever interests me. It's also much more flexible. If something becomes boring, I can just shift to something else.
I'm definitely a believer in lifelong learning, so that's an essential piece of retirement for me.
Hello ER Eddie,
I really appreciate the post. You hit on a lot of topics that I’ve been thinking about. I am not yet retired but considered retiring at 62YO. One of the topics you mentioned is a big consideration for me. That is, engaging in meaningful activities. I do have hobbies that I would like to explore more deeply. Such as, musical instruments and community service. I have worked in the healthcare system for 30 years and I would like to continue some humanitarian service. What speaks most loudly to me is the ability to structure my time and using that time purposefully. As you stated in your post, that may not be for everyone. And I get that. But for me it would be important. Currently I am off work due to COVID-19 and a health-blip. All is good. And I feel in better shape than I have in 20 years. Thanks for the post.
You're welcome. I'm sure you'll find something meaningful to do in retirement -- sounds like you've already got plenty of experience and some ideas to explore.
I'll just throw this in, without knowing whether it applies to you. After 30 years in healthcare, some people who retire need a time period where they can just focus on themselves -- taking care of themselves, getting themselves healthy, recharging, or just enjoying things. Healthcare can be a stressful industry to work in, and it's constant focus on what other people or the system needs. I worked in that industry myself. I know lots of people who are great caretakers of others, but who tend to neglect their own feelings and needs.
If that fits you at all, make sure to allow plenty of time to just relax and do whatever you feel like doing. Shrug off guilt about not being "productive." Don't buy into messages about what you "should" be doing with your time. Don't worry about doing meaningful work or service for a while. Just let yourself relax and enjoy the freedom of retirement -- of not HAVING to do anything for anyone else or for some hospital system.
You're obviously a service-oriented person, so that need will arise naturally, when you are ready. But give yourself plenty of time and permission to just relax, unwind, and enjoy not
having to do anything.