There once was a guy named Bubba.
Bubba once told his friend “I know everyone in the world. I really do.”
His friend replied respectfully, “Now Bubba. You know a lot of people, but there’s no way you know everybody in the world.”
“Yes I do. Pick anyone.”
“Okay, I bet you don’t know the mayor”
“Sure I do. Go ask him”
“Okay, I will”
So, he went to see the mayor.
“Excuse me mayor, but do you know Bubba?”
“Oh, Bubba, sure I know Bubba. I’ve known Bubba since we were kids”.
So the friend went back to Bubba. “Okay, Bubba, I didn’t think you know the mayor. I guess you do. But, seriously, there’s no way you know everyone in the world.
“But I’m telling you I do. Try me again”
“Okay, I bet you don’t know the governor”
“The governor. Of course I do. Go ask him”
“Okay, I will”
So, he went to see the governor.
“Excuse me governor, but do you know Bubba?”
“Oh, Bubba, sure I know Bubba. Bubba is a great friend of mine”.
Surprised, the friend went back to Bubba. “Okay, Bubba, I didn’t think you know the governor. I guess you do. But, seriously, there’s no way you know everyone in the world.”
“But, I keep telling you I do. Name someone else. Anyone”.
“Okay, I want to try someone away from politics. What about Tom Cruise. I be you don’t know Tom Cruise. You obviously know a lot of people, but there’s no way you know Tom Cruise.”
“Oh, Tommy boy. Sure I know him. Why don’t you ask him?”
“Okay, I will”
So, he was able to go to where Tom Cruise was filming a new movie and made his way to the studio, where he was able to briefly approach him.
“Excuse me Mr. Cruise. I know this is an awkward question, but do you know Bubba?”
“Oh, Bubba, sure I know Bubba. I’ve known Bubba long before I became an actor.”
So the friend went back to Bubba shocked an amazed. “Okay, Bubba, I didn’t think you would know Tom Cruise, but I guess you do. But, seriously, these are just coincidences. There’s no way you know everyone in the world.”
“But I keep telling you I do. Name someone else.”
“Okay, but this one is going to be a stretch. I bet you don’t know the President of the United States.”
“Oh, that’s easy. He’s an old friend. Of course I do. Go ask him”
“Okay, I will”.
Through a series of connections, the friend was able to have a brief encounter with the president.
“Mr. President, I’m so sorry to bother you, but one quick question. Do you know Bubba?”
“Do I know Bubba? Well, is this a trick question? Because that’s too easy. Of course I know Bubba. I’ve known Bubba since long before I got into politics.”
The friend was stunned. He went back to Bubba and said, “I really am surprised. You clearly appear to know just about everyone. You knew the mayor, the governor, Tom Cruise and the president. But, seriously, it’s a big world. There’s no way you could know everyone in the world.”
“Try me”.
“Okay, one more test. If you pass this one I’ll assume you know everyone in the world. I bet you don’t know the Pope.”
“Oh, the Pope. Of course, I do. That’s easy. I knew the Pope before he was confirmed as a Catholic”
“Well, I’ll have to see it for myself. This time you’re going with me.”
So, they went to see the Pope, but when they got to the Vatican, the Pope was scheduled to speak to the crowds of people. Bubba said, “Look, it’s been a while since the Pope has seen me. I don’t want to startle him. Let me go in and say a few words to him and then I’ll introduce you.”
The friend just knew he had him. He knew Bubba would go in, get the Pope to go along with his story and try to make him believe they already knew each other, but, he decided to let him go.
A few minutes later, the Pope came out on the balcony to speak to the crowds. Who would have guessed, but walking closely behind the Pope was none other than Bubba.
And that’s when the friend passed out.
Bubba rushed down to check on his friend. He woke his friend and said, “Are you okay? What happened?”
“Well”, the friend said, “I was okay until everyone around me started saying, ‘Who’s that guy with Bubba?”
