How Do You Handle Change?

[Aerides]

The kind of changes you list are kind of normal - a typical year. So if you're having difficulty with those types of events, perhaps there is some unaddressed underlying issue to explore?

 

[street]

Don't like them, but except them, and battle through the new way.

 

[jollystomper]

What mindset do you use to deal with change?

That change is just a way of life, the only thing constant?

I just noticed plenty of changes going on for (all within a year. A bit exasperating). Let's see ...

1. Favorite musical act - band leader left
2. Favorite baseball team - cleaned house, traded their star players
3. Friend moved out of state
4. Favorite news program - the best anchor (in my opinion) left
5. Cell phone service - just got email, need to get a new phone, 3G soon no longer supported
6. Bank account - changing to new bank
7. Computer - Win 11 on the horizion

That's enough for now. I'm sure there is more if I think harder.

In all honesty, those particular changes you mention I see as normal. I have seen all of these acted out multiple times in my lifetime, so I am more surprised when the do not happen .

I am used to change. My life lessons have taught me that the issue is not the changes, but how one deals with them. One example was my career in IT. If I had not been willing to evaluate and embrace change, I would not have had a lucrative IT career. I never wanted to get too comfortable in my knowledge and not be willing to accept changes that, while a challenge in the short run, would ultimately expand my expertise in the long run.

 

[brett]

I worked in the IT industry for 35 year. Change was what made it so enjoyable and challenging.

I think that many had as much or more problem with social change. They still do. Some really dislike the word 'why'. I believe that change is healthy.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

No trouble. That having to change my cell phone email hit me hard today .

I'm unlike those who jump at the latest and greatest. I'm thinking, "Hope that isn't a big pain" .

Oh, and I can feel you pain w/ the 3G sunset. Changing the cell phone isn't a huge pain (we use cheap Android devices) but the home security system also needs to be updated and it will be a pain to change out the module.

 

[unclemick]

Agile, Mobile, and hostile' - ? the late Bear Bryant describing the ideal linebacker.

Left grad school abruptly - !-A for draft, got a secret clearance and thirty years 'to beat the Russians.'

Layoff age 50 - moved to 'the swamp' and cut expenses 88%. Net worth ballpark 250K that's k. Discovered ER and made the mental shift.

Katrina - lost house and all contents - no insurance(on pilings over water). Moved 1000 miles inland on a hill. 3 deaths in six months - Mom, significant other, and a 30 year friend we evacuated with.

Heh heh heh - after 28 years of ER working on becoming a 'grumpy old curmudgeon' but lose it every once in a while and get 'that grin' - you know the 'S--- eating kind '.

 

[Koolau]

Oh, and I can feel you pain w/ the 3G sunset. Changing the cell phone isn't a huge pain (we use cheap Android devices) but the home security system also needs to be updated and it will be a pain to change out the module.

Just found out yesterday that DW's "new" phone won't be working with the plan for much longer. She is really upset as she likes the phone (lightweight - not like the brick I just bought.) She spent over $100 for her phone and thinks it ought to "last" longer than 2 years. I feel her pain, but reality is: It Is what it IS! YMMV

 

[RetiredAndLovingIt]

These old phones are still very useful around the house.
I keep my old Moto G4 as a spare on and I loaded my google voice app on it so I could make and receive WIFI calls. I also use the calculator all the time in my home office or to take a quick photo of the dog or cat doing something stupid. When I'm gardening, I take it outside, I don't care if it gets damaged or dropped.
I wanted to give it to my just turned 5 year old grandson but my son nixed that idea, I'm still working on that.
And of course it can also be used as a glove box emergency phone to call 911.

 

[easysurfer]

The kind of changes you list are kind of normal - a typical year. So if you're having difficulty with those types of events, perhaps there is some unaddressed underlying issue to explore?

The underlying issue is I don't like change .

 

[Marita40]

I consider all the OPs examples things that don't concern me at all--just normal events. "Change" that might rock my boat are much bigger things. I did feel a bit at sea when my 30+ year doctor retired a couple months ago--oh no! She knew me so well. But I love my new doctor! Retirement this year was a surprisingly easy change to fit into to. I think I've realized over the years that fears of things like "change" are usually just imaginary and the reality is I adapt just fine. And many times the change is actually for the better.

 

[ncbill]

We Fear Change

 

[JT90505]

For most things, complain about it with those that share my perspective. Gives us something to talk about.

Right now, accepting that Covid is not disappearing and is not going to disappear anytime soon is a change I need to figure out how to adapt to. It is a change that directly affects me and those I care about.

 

[Sunset]

I don't really pay attention, so most changes don't bug me.

When a change does affect me (changing player in some team doesn't), I try to see how can I get an advantage out of this or an alternative.

Example:
When my ISP raises the rate on internet, I check to see who else provides it and would switching be better/worse.

 

[easysurfer]

One way of dealing (right or wrong) is not committing so much in the future. Almost like the once bitten, twice shy saying.

Example #1: The baseball team trading away their star players. Yes, might be necessary. Also, they didn't go deep (except a couple of times) in the playoffs with the core players. But at the same time, I'm not going to be suckered following the team during the rebuilding years. I'll wait until they show they are truly competitive before spending my time.

Example #2: New way of doing things on Computer. I was quite happy with compact discs (thought do like the idea of playing off a flash drive). But never did the iPod, Pandora, Spotify thing. Win 11 on the horizon. I was happy with Win XP/Win 7. Really didn't care for trying to make a computer in Win 10 act like a phone. I've side stepped Win 10 somewhat by using a program to make my start menu look like Win 7. Hopefully, will do the same when Win 11 comes around.

Sometimes change is needed. But other times, change for the sake of change (A new and improved look on a banking site as an example) because everyone else is doing that, I can do without.

 

[brett]

Pre covid we did a fair amount of extended land travel. Much of it spontaneous.

During our working careers we lived in several different locations w/frequent business travel.

I believe this has made a difference in how we deal with, and adapt to change.

 

[Zona]

For me my response depends on what or who is driving the change. I am a big believer in Stoic philosophy and I try to keep the serenity prayer in mind whenever life throws a curveball.

Situational changes where I know I can only control my response? I usually adjust my behavior and reset my expectations.

Peripheral changes that only have a minor impact on my daily life? Acknowledge and move on.

Minor changes to my routines or habits requested (or demanded) by others? Dig in and resist. [emoji23] Stoicism only gets you so far.

 

[Midpack]

Personally, I tell myself that life is nothing but change. Very few things stay static and I always expect multiple "changes to the change." I am sure 20+ years in the Air Force probably taught me A LOT about how to deal with it.

Biggest thing I tell myself is plan for the worst and hope for the best.

+1. I've always welcomed and encouraged change, life would be boring otherwise to me. So when change comes about for less than ideal reasons, I move past it pretty quickly. I know a lot of people who resist and dislike change, I'm just not one of them. DW and I moved 750 miles south for retirement, to a state we'd never lived in, where we didn't know anyone at all - that's interesting to us...

 

[easysurfer]

Oh, and I can feel you pain w/ the 3G sunset. Changing the cell phone isn't a huge pain (we use cheap Android devices) but the home security system also needs to be updated and it will be a pain to change out the module.

I accepted the fact that I gotta replace my phone from 3G.

Just ordered the replacement phone. Went for a refurbished model on Consume Cellular. Saved $20 by going refurb .

My deciding factor as to which phone to choose. Had to get one that fits my current phone case. Take that! .. change.

 

[brett]

I had a career in IT. Continuous change.

My observation was that those who could adapt quickly to and accept change were considerably more successful than those who could not.

 

[pacergal]

The only constant in our lives IS change.

Used that quote many times.
Gotta roll with the punches, don't always like it, but life moves forward whether I like it or not. It's easier to like it and adjust as best I can.

 

[brett]

We are very spontaneous travelers pre covid.

We might only book a one way flight or a flight into one city and home from another city or country eight weeks later. Everything in between is subject to change other than the first two or three nights and the last night prior to flying home. Always with carry on only. It has been this way for 10 years and we love it.

I think this works for us because we have always lived with a great deal of change in our career and our personal lives. Whether it be job related or relocation.

I believe change is reflected in, and very visible in, people's careers, their investment strategy, tolerance to risk, and their personal lives.

We have found that in retirement we are even more accepting of change. We have had as much, probably more, change in 10 years of retirement than we did pre retirement. Keeps us on our toes and enjoying things that we were previously not able to.

 

[Markola]

I deal with change by putting it in a coffee can when I have some, and then donating it to Salvation Army each year, making some bell ringer smile.

 

[Koolau]

I deal with change by putting it in a coffee can when I have some, and then donating it to Salvation Army each year, making some bell ringer smile.

Thanks for the idea!

 

[GaryInCO]

I just noticed plenty of changes going on for (all within a year. A bit exasperating). Let's see ...

Changes? 2020 "the year from hell" started a bit early for me.

May 2019: Brother diagnosed with prostate cancer
July 2019: *I'm* diagnosed with prostate cancer
Sept 2019: Vacationing in France, I flipped my bike and (I later learned) cracked 5 ribs
Oct-Nov 2019: Various surgeries, biopsies, etc
Dec 2019: During a scan to prep for prostate surgery, I'm diagnosed with lymphoma
Jan 2020: Prostate surgery (implanting radioactive seeds)
Feb 2020: Somehow tore my rotator cuff, possibly triggered by bike crash
Mar 2020: That morphed into "frozen" shoulder joint, much more painful and limiting
Apr 2020: Something about a pandemic
May 2020: My mother passed

...and I'm sure I missed a few things.

Before 2019 I always went 5-10 years between anything more serious than a head cold, and suddenly I'm spending disturbing amounts of time and money in hospitals.

I was still working part-time, and that involved business travel (US and Canada) 1-2 weeks per month. I enjoyed it. I planned to do a lot of travel (US and international) when I retired. But plans changed; I haven't been in a plane for 2 years. I'm not sure when I will be able to, since my cancer means I'm at extreme risk from Covid. The most exotic trip I've taken since 2019 is an hour drive down to Denver. I missed my mother's last year of life, her funeral, my favorite niece's wedding, and other important events because it is simply not safe for me to expose myself that much.

So yeah, I'd LOVE some more changes! But for a change, I'd like some POSITIVE changes!!!

 

[tenant13]

We are very spontaneous travelers pre covid.

We might only book a one way flight or a flight into one city and home from another city or country eight weeks later. Everything in between is subject to change other than the first two or three nights and the last night prior to flying home. Always with carry on only. It has been this way for 10 years and we love it.

I think this works for us because we have always lived with a great deal of change in our career and our personal lives. Whether it be job related or relocation.

I believe change is reflected in, and very visible in, people's careers, their investment strategy, tolerance to risk, and their personal lives.

We have found that in retirement we are even more accepting of change. We have had as much, probably more, change in 10 years of retirement than we did pre retirement. Keeps us on our toes and enjoying things that we were previously not able to.

That’s pretty much me. On the road for the last two months. I spent the last two or so weeks in Canada, made new friends, visited old ones and just decided that I’ll hit Cleveland after Buffalo. No clue what’s next. My dream is to get rid of most of my stuff and live out of a carry-on. Buy what I need, donate or throw out what I don’t, stay in places for as long as I feel like it. For now I have a home but I find it limiting and a drag. You could say I thrive on change.