This. Don't assume your local cancer center has the best outcomes. Reach out to the people here who have offered to assist you, this is a time to engage people to seek the best treatment possible.
I Honestly Knew That Life Was Going Too Smoothly
- Thread starter erkevin
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This. Don't assume your local cancer center has the best outcomes. Reach out to the people here who have offered to assist you, this is a time to engage people to seek the best treatment possible.
foxfirev5
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All the best to you. As others have said this is the time to do all the homework you can. Ask questions and if you're not comfortable with the answers feel free to question. You are in charge. Keep a positive pragmatic approach. Also, the thoughts and prayers from others will help.
Wishing you the best.
Recently read a book that made a claim that fasting before and to a day beyond chemo reduced the bad side effects while improving the results of the chemo.
Worth a shot if it comes to that. The book is called the longevity diet.
Recently read a book that made a claim that fasting before and to a day beyond chemo reduced the bad side effects while improving the results of the chemo.
Worth a shot if it comes to that. The book is called the longevity diet.
OP, I re examined all my medical records from my (2) cancer DX this morning. The CT scans, bone scans, MRI, oncology reports, I saved them all. I had an Oncotype DX after surgery in 2011. This report tells you probabilities of recurrence after the pathology is examined. Check to see if insurance covers this. My sentinel lymph node biopsy was positive, with microscopic invasive cell(s). The rest of lymph nodes negative. My chance for recurrence was very low. From this report I decided to forgo chemo and radiation. This is a personal choice.
My advice, demand complete explanation of all the medical jargon that is thrown at you. There is so much information to digest. Keep asking questions, if you don't understand, ask again. Second and third opinions are to your benefit. Any Oncologist worth their weight will welcome 2nd and 3rd opinions.
Many healing thoughts sent your way, spiritual, physical and mental.
My advice, demand complete explanation of all the medical jargon that is thrown at you. There is so much information to digest. Keep asking questions, if you don't understand, ask again. Second and third opinions are to your benefit. Any Oncologist worth their weight will welcome 2nd and 3rd opinions.
Many healing thoughts sent your way, spiritual, physical and mental.
yakers
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Wish the best for you and your wife. DW had cancer 20 yrs back, I had stage 4 throat cancer 3 yrs back. Miserable. When you get past it life may change a little.Now if I miss an airline flight or get to deal with tax increases it 'hey, it does not involve radiation & chemo so its no big deal'.
PoorOldCountryBoy
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Sorry to hear about the diagnosis, but please take heart in all the stories here-it is very definitely beatable. My Dad had a 10% survival lung cancer diagnosis in 1984. He lived till 2005 normal (a bit slowed due to the lung operation of course but otherwise normal). He was basically cured because he caught it early and got help.
Have a good cry both of you, then get motivated--beat this thing! Don't be afraid to ask your loved ones for exactly what you do or do not want. Most will go out of their way to help.
Have a good cry both of you, then get motivated--beat this thing! Don't be afraid to ask your loved ones for exactly what you do or do not want. Most will go out of their way to help.
Ronnieboy
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Sorry to hear erkevin It is a punch to the gut. I am going through this myself now with DW. I don't want to hijack the thread, but our experience so far has gone from terrified/death sentence to looking forward to our plans after treatment.
DW around her 54th bday in Jan of this year, noticed her nipple was inverting...weird huh, of course webmd says everything is cancer so I told her not to look it up online and lets get into the MD right away. Went to the after hours clinic the next day and a lump could be felt, mammogram scheduled and within a week we were doing a biopsy on the tumor. Found out it was a 5cm tumor and one of the most common types of breast cancer. Also found out one of the 'fingers' of the tumor was growing towards her nipple and that is what caused it to be inverted, because it was pulling it in from the inside
The thing that freaked DW was that her mother was diagnosed with BC and died about 2 years later That was about 27 years ago and all I can say is that medicine has come a long way baby!
So we went from thinking with the diagnosis that DW would be dead within two years to having a 90% cure rate with chemo and radiation.
DW had a double mastectomy mid February, they were able to get clear margins around the tumor and the first sentinel lymph node was packed full of cancer cells and were starting to burst through that one but the other 18 they took all tested negative. Resulting in a stage IIb classification. Grade 3 aggressively growing...
Started chemo just this past Wednesday taking two drugs that they call A/C Adriamycin/cyclophosphamide and as I type, has been laid up in bed nauseated and exhausted like no other for the past 56 hours. We're hoping tonight was the worst and she'll start climbing out of the hole tomorrow. Planning on losing her hair around day 17
She has 4 cycles of that, every other week then 4 cycles of taxol every other week after the A/C, then 28 cycles of radiation. Whoo, it seems like her full time job is now going to the myriad of Doctors.
DW was beating herself up for not getting her mammograms on a regular basis and luckily the surgeon let her know that even if she had this was still going to happen, they 'might' have caught it earlier but not necessarily so.
All I can say is be there for your DW and be her support, my wife found it difficult to lose her breasts and I am thinking the hair loss is going to be another biggie. I offered to shave my head to match her soon to be bald head, but she said no go, I guess she is afraid of my huge misshapen head
Hang in there and God bless.
DW around her 54th bday in Jan of this year, noticed her nipple was inverting...weird huh, of course webmd says everything is cancer so I told her not to look it up online and lets get into the MD right away. Went to the after hours clinic the next day and a lump could be felt, mammogram scheduled and within a week we were doing a biopsy on the tumor. Found out it was a 5cm tumor and one of the most common types of breast cancer. Also found out one of the 'fingers' of the tumor was growing towards her nipple and that is what caused it to be inverted, because it was pulling it in from the inside
The thing that freaked DW was that her mother was diagnosed with BC and died about 2 years later
That was about 27 years ago and all I can say is that medicine has come a long way baby!So we went from thinking with the diagnosis that DW would be dead within two years to having a 90% cure rate with chemo and radiation.
DW had a double mastectomy mid February, they were able to get clear margins around the tumor and the first sentinel lymph node was packed full of cancer cells and were starting to burst through that one but the other 18 they took all tested negative. Resulting in a stage IIb classification. Grade 3 aggressively growing...
Started chemo just this past Wednesday taking two drugs that they call A/C Adriamycin/cyclophosphamide and as I type, has been laid up in bed nauseated and exhausted like no other for the past 56 hours. We're hoping tonight was the worst and she'll start climbing out of the hole tomorrow. Planning on losing her hair around day 17
She has 4 cycles of that, every other week then 4 cycles of taxol every other week after the A/C, then 28 cycles of radiation. Whoo, it seems like her full time job is now going to the myriad of Doctors.
DW was beating herself up for not getting her mammograms on a regular basis and luckily the surgeon let her know that even if she had this was still going to happen, they 'might' have caught it earlier but not necessarily so.
All I can say is be there for your DW and be her support, my wife found it difficult to lose her breasts and I am thinking the hair loss is going to be another biggie. I offered to shave my head to match her soon to be bald head, but she said no go, I guess she is afraid of my huge misshapen head
Hang in there and God bless.
Calico
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It sounds like your DW has been diagnosed with IDC. I am sure that both of you are feeling overwhelmed by emotions at the moment, not to mention trying to process all the information the doctors are throwing at you. It is a scary time, but I agree with a lot of the previous posters that there are reasons to feel hopeful. As one poster said, treatment has improved by leaps and bounds in the last 20 years. Every chance you get, take a deep breath (both of you!) and remind yourselves that you can get through this together.
I was diagnosed with IDC in May of 2018. It was caught when it was small and early, and it sounds like that is the case with your DW as well. My lymph nodes were negative. I chose to undergo a double mastectomy rather than a lumpectomy - this was my personal choice, which was at odds with the surgeon's recommendation of a lumpectomy. I simply didn't want to deal with a lifetime of constant mammograms going forward, nor did I want to have radiation. I haven't regretted my decision for a single moment.
I opted for several rounds of chemo, which I completed six months ago this week. I will take a hormone suppressant daily for 5 years (so 4.5 more years).
Chemo for me was not a picnic, however, it was nothing like what I feared. My main issue throughout was extreme fatigue. They give patients loads of anti-nausea meds these days. As they explained it to me, no matter what side effects I had from chemo, they had a way to treat them. I can tell you that this turned out to be absolutely true!
I had an amazing medical team, and they still follow me closely; I have rechecks every 3 months for now. I am feeling very good, and most of my energy is back. I still experience fatigue if I do too much, so I work shorter hours for the time being, and I really pace myself in every area of my life outside work. The most important advice my doctors gave me, and I will pass this along for your DW, was to listen to my body. I can't stress this enough. I became a world class napper!!
The other bit of advice I can share is to ask for help from family and friends. People want to help, but they don't always know what to do. It is OK to ask for help!
Best of luck on this journey, and please give my best wishes to your DW. I hope she will take comfort from knowing that it is possible to get through whatever treatment you choose, and to thrive on the other side.
Calico
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Ronnie,
Please see my post at #63. I traveled almost the same road as your DW, except that my lymph nodes were negative. I am now six months post-chemo and thriving. I also beat myself up for skipping my mammogram for one year, and my surgeon said exactly the same thing - they may or may not have found it earlier, but it would not have changed the outcome for me.
These next few months are the time for your wife to be very kind to herself, and to rest as much as she can.
Reassure her that the hair does grow back!! I was bald for several months, but my hair has grown back and I actually like it more than I liked my pre-chemo hair. I didn't want to face slowly losing my hair in bits and pieces, so I went to Great Clips one week before chemo and they shaved my head. In this area they do this for free for anyone undergoing chemo. Amazon has a great variety of beanies, FYI.
Best of luck to both of you on your journey.
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Hope the surgeon was able to explain the procedure options to you and DW, and provide some comfort.
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I had that test as well. It turned out not to be covered by my insurance, but the company ended up waiving the fee. There is now more information available as to which scores (as rated by the onco DX) would be most likely to benefit from chemo, as there was when I was tested.
Here's a link from breastcancer.org about oncotype DX.
https://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/testing/types/oncotype_dx
https://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/testing/types/oncotype_dx
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Thank you to everyone for your kind words and wisdom. It is IDC and having had a few days to digest that, leaves us believing that we are very fortunate. The tumor is only about 1 cm. The lumpectomy is Wednesday and that will tell us what we will need to do going forward (they are also taking sections of lymph node).
Since most of us are older, we grew up knowing people who died from cancer. I recall that a cancer diagnosis = a death sentence. Now, we all know cancer survivors.
Thank you again.
Since most of us are older, we grew up knowing people who died from cancer. I recall that a cancer diagnosis = a death sentence. Now, we all know cancer survivors.
Thank you again.
Calico
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After Wednesday you and your DW will have a lot more information.
The waiting and the not knowing what to expect is the hardest part. Once you have information and can begin taking action, you might be surprised and find that the stress drops considerably. It sounds strange but it's true for a lot of people.
Good luck on Wednesday and here's hoping they get results back to you quickly.
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I found that to be true as well.
I am hoping that Kevin & his DW get good news on Wednesday.
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Nemo2
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And you always focus on the worst case scenario.
So sorry y'all are going through this & praying for you both!
Lots of great words of advice here already. The only thing I can think of to add is a blog post I read a while back & thought made a lot of sense regarding how the family rallies around the patient. An entertaining read even if you do not end up implementing this strategy:
Jen Hatmaker - Our Family Cancer Manifesto
Lots of great words of advice here already. The only thing I can think of to add is a blog post I read a while back & thought made a lot of sense regarding how the family rallies around the patient. An entertaining read even if you do not end up implementing this strategy:
Jen Hatmaker - Our Family Cancer Manifesto
Again, thank you to everyone for their thoughts, prayers, and advice. Step one is complete; lumpectomy was yesterday. It was a horribly long day, but the results were about as good as a person could hope for. Surgeon got all of the tumor and a good portion of surrounding tissue. Slides of the lymph nodes were negative (yeah!). Everything still has to be sent to pathology, but for now, the news is good.
Teacher Terry
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That’s great news. A friend of mine was diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer at age 48. After surgery was told she had 6 months. She said no way was she dying and had chemo and lived another 20 years. It’s amazing how positive she was as I don’t think I could have maintained that attitude.
