I seem to be living above my means again...

[CindyBlue]

I'm paying $396 a month for my wife to go do cross-fit multiple times a week. She has a six pack now after 9 months, which is insane... but it keeps her healthy and obviously I like it. I'm also paying for Terminex / termite protection for my home, as well as other services like music lessons and other things for my daughter, and continuing education as well (working on another degree that I'm paying for out of pocket)

Seems to me that you can enjoy the benefits and experiences that the extra income you are making allows for without being extravagant. I don't think any of these are extravagant spending. To me, extravagant would be things such as buying that extra car you mentioned for the reasons (not to buy) that you mentioned (smile!)

 

[82-T/A]

Saving money in an after tax account provides a lot of flexibility as you approach early retirement. It gives you the funds you need to bridge you from retirement to when you can access your retirement funds. You can also use the after tax money to pay the taxes on any Roth conversions you may do between retirement and RMD age. You can also use it to manage your income for ACA subsidies.
Additionally, I suggest you open a Roth IRA for each of you and your spouse and use backdoor Roth contributions to fund it. It’s simply contributing after tax money into a traditional IRA, then converting it to your Roth IRA. Take advantage of tax free growth.
Start learning about retirement and taxes, and things like IRMAA. If you adjust some things now it can save you tens of thousands later.

Much of what you've said here has gone over my head, so I'm going to have to take a hard look at what you've said and do my research. I really appreciate this response. We both have a Roth IRA, but I think I was told that $6,000 was the maximum per year for each, so I haven't put in more than that. I also don't know what a backdoor conversion is. I do have a normal investment account that I also use as a savings account. I kind of just dump all my savings into this large account that I also buy stocks with. I suppose everyone is a genius when the stock market is doing well, but I've managed to just scrape by and not lose THAT much in 2022.

Can I adopt your daughter? She seems like one smart cookie!

If I had a single son in her age range, I might want to arrange a meeting. But, I don't, so adoption seems like a good idea.

Hahaha... I'm definitely extremely lucky. I'm definitely not a fan of boys and my daughter in the same sentence, hahah. I told my daughter that I accidentally fell on top of mommy one day, and a baby came out. Obviously, at 14, she knows I'm kidding, but I emphasize the need to be very responsible and have explained to her how boys at her age are, and what they're thinking about. She seems to gravitate to the ones who volunteer and get good grades.



Despite my best efforts, she's turned out extremely normal. Literally, straight-As for 5 years in a row... like, not even a B. I graduated from high school with a 1.7 GPA... she has a 4.2 right now. I blast Slayer, Pantera, or Motley Crue in the car when I drive her to school, and she tells me it's too loud and asks me to put classical music on. I offer her wine and / or beer at dinner, and she says alcohol tastes gross. She doesn't even like candy or chips, just dark chocolate. She speaks 3 languages, plays two instruments, and already knows more about circuits than I do. At her age, I was hacking BBSes and early websites, and downloading porn ... instead, she's writing a medieval fantasy novel with two of her friends (they're on their second 300+ page book). So, magically, somehow... I've managed to do something right there. I am reminded by that sinking ship "De-motivational Poster"


"Sometimes, the only point of your life is to serve as a warning to others!"


hahaah!!!




EDIT: Just saw your link for the podcast that you added. Thank you! I will listen to this!

 

[COcheesehead]

Saving money in an after tax account provides a lot of flexibility as you approach early retirement. It gives you the funds you need to bridge you from retirement to when you can access your retirement funds. You can also use the after tax money to pay the taxes on any Roth conversions you may do between retirement and RMD age. You can also use it to manage your income for ACA subsidies.
Additionally, I suggest you open a Roth IRA for each of you and your spouse and use backdoor Roth contributions to fund it. It’s simply contributing after tax money into a traditional IRA, then converting it to your Roth IRA. Take advantage of tax free growth.
Start learning about retirement and taxes, and things like IRMAA. If you adjust some things now it can save you tens of thousands later.

This is good advice. Too many people pack all their funds into deferred accounts and then realize that isn’t optimal - when it’s too late.

 

[Jerry1]

This is good advice. Too many people pack all their funds into deferred accounts and then realize that isn’t optimal - when it’s too late.

It might also be good to focus on ROTH contributions as long as OP is under the limit to be able to contribute. By the time I figured out what a ROTH was and how beneficial it could be, I was making too much money to contribute to one. At the rate OP is getting salary increases, it might be too late, but if not, a ROTH is a good place for extra savings.

 

[Out-to-Lunch]

Don't look at me for assistance -- I am reading Die With Zero at the moment....

 

[Sunset]

OP - I found when I started tracking my expenses I learned a lot about where the $$ is going.

I use "spending tracker" an app on my phone, as it's easy to enter the number right after the expense, wherever I am, since I nearly always have my phone. Every penny.

I don't bother with the income part of it, just expenses.

I second other folks, think seriously about buying more "stuff" as it ends up being a bunch of crap that takes up space, makes it hard to move, and is actually hard to sell as other people all want a great deal or are also downsizing.

For sure, don't buy another collector car until you get the 2 in storage fixed up and sold.. or you will be like my relative holding onto a car for over a decade costing him $$ every year that he doesn't drive.

 

[Sojourner]

I started a new job about 14 months ago where I effectively doubled my income. I have no debt except for a mortgage, have a rental property, two pensions, and lots of 401k savings... so I'm not struggling to be sure. But with my new income, I quickly fell into the trap of living a lifestyle much higher than what I have normally accustomed myself to.

A few questions spring to mind:

• How much were you making prior to the doubling of your income?
• How old are you now?
• What is your investable net worth currently, not including the value of your primary residence?

The reason I ask is that your age and annual income (prior to your big raise) should roughly correlate with your net worth and give some indication as to how well you are progressing towards FIRE. If your numbers indicate that you are an "under accumulator of wealth" (ref. the UAW/PAW concept from The Millionaire Next Door), then this would be a big, red, flashing warning sign to seriously reign in your spending and ramp up your savings and investing. OTOH, if you are solidly in the PAW category (prodigious accumulator of wealth), then you have less to worry about and can maybe just tweak your spending habits to keep your financial journey towards FIRE on a more ideal track.

 

[RobbieB]

If you are still saving money and your net worth is increasing you are not living above your means.

If your debt in increasing and your net worth is dropping, you are spending too much.

Yeah, you are making more money now and having fun!

 

[Amethyst]

LAYM = Living Above Your Means.

Most banks will let you automate, via their web site, a certain amount per month/every two weeks/whatever, to a biller of your choice. Most mortgage companies will automatically apply to principal, any overage on your monthly payment.

As to whether you "should" prepay your mortgage, that's entirely up to you and your situation. I only mentioned it because you talked about how much you could have paid down your mortgage, if you'd spent less. That made prepaying the mortgage seem like something you'd like to do.

Something I enjoyed doing, back when I had a mortgage, was calculating how fast I could pay it down, depending on how much extra I applied to principal. There are many prepayment calculators out there, such as this one: https://www.bankrate.com/mortgages/mortgage-loan-payoff-calculator/

As for being frustrated with a sideways stock market, I feel your pain. With interest rates on the rise, you certainly could put that $1000 into a high-yield low-expense money market fund. Just remember that interest income is taxed as ordinary income.

As for less eating out, as I said, that's my idea of a money suck...but I also like to cook. So that is just my notion of an easy way to save money.

Thank you so much for the response, I appreciate it. Do you mind if I ask a few questions?

1. Can I ask, what does LAYM mean?
2. You also mentioned automating "principle payments," I didn't even know that was possible to do? I suppose that depends on the brokerage firm.
3. My mortgage is 3.125%, do you think it's worth it with such a low interest rate?

I do put $1,000 into a separate investment account every two weeks, but I feel like the most I've been able to do is just "not lose" money, so extra money I've just been putting into savings since I'm frustrated with the stock market. But you're right, I need to be able to cut back eating out. But I usually take the family out Friday and Saturday night just so my wife doesn't to cook and to get out of the house after the work week. But yeah, maybe I need to find some cheaper alternatives that are also healthy.








That is a fantastic point... "Every $1k saved now means another month I can retire earlier..." Your last point is interesting too... what do you mean / suggest by putting her in charge?

 

[simple girl]

Saving money in an after tax account provides a lot of flexibility as you approach early retirement. It gives you the funds you need to bridge you from retirement to when you can access your retirement funds. You can also use the after tax money to pay the taxes on any Roth conversions you may do between retirement and RMD age. You can also use it to manage your income for ACA subsidies.
Additionally, I suggest you open a Roth IRA for each of you and your spouse and use backdoor Roth contributions to fund it. It’s simply contributing after tax money into a traditional IRA, then converting it to your Roth IRA. Take advantage of tax free growth.
Start learning about retirement and taxes, and things like IRMAA. If you adjust some things now it can save you tens of thousands later.

+1, excellent advice

Our after-tax account has been critical as it has allowed us:

1) to have income during the years between retirement and when DH will be able to access his IRA's penalty-free (age 59.5). So, if you think you might want to retire before that age, get that after-tax account funded with tax-efficient investments

2) to be able to manage our MAGI, which has allowed us to obtain subsidies for our ACA healthcare premiums. This has allowed us to maintain a much more reasonable budget and limit our withdrawals, thereby improving the likelihood that our funds will last us the rest of our lives.

 

[brett]

No one can solve this for you.

It is simple. Either you want to do or you do not want to do it.

If you REALY want to do it, either live within your means or save more, than only you have the key to that avenue.

So, as the saying goes.....just do it.

Or..keep on making excuses to yourself.

 

[PlayinwithFIRE]

I like to separate my expenses into fixed and discretionary. Things like mortgage, water bill, electricity fall in the fixed category.

The fixed category is a monthly continuous drain on you, the discretionary (like a 66 Mustang-good choice btw !) are 1 off , less predictable costs that can actually be completely avoided if you really want to.

I don't worry too much about the discretionary, as I know I have the last say in those events unless they are damage/replacement type events.

The fixed however, are coming whether you like it or not. I spend a lot of time thinking about ways to minimize these expenses.

A few examples :

1) Put solar panels on the house - eliminated the electricity bill...forever. Every year the rates go up, and my time to break even gets closer.
2) Put a water monitor on the house and began replacing old high flow faucets with lower flow..reducing water bill by 1/3 for about $100.
3) Every few years, as much as I hate it, I shop around for lower insurance rates.
4) When an appliance breaks, take the time to ensure the replacement is a lower draw on electricity/water, etc .
5) Research credit cards with good bonus programs etc change if you find something better
6) Opt to have money taken directly from your paycheck and pushed into investment accounts-so its gone before you can touch it.

I get some enjoyment out of nickel and diming these fixed expenses Its kind of a game for me to do whatever I can to minimize the unavoidable and over the years I have made considerable progress, which, over the years really starts to add up !

Good luck

 

[Dash man]

A backdoor Roth conversion is a way to contribute to a Roth IRA if you are over the income limits to contribute directly into a Roth. I guess I assumed with your large salary increases you were over the limit.
For 2023 you can contribute up to $6500 each.

 

[4legsgood]

Sorry but to me all your posts seem like humble (or not) brags. You're saving 24k a year in taxable and 21k in tax def, plus lots in 529. So you're not living beyond your means, but sounds like there might be issues with how you feel about constantly buying a bunch of stuff that doesn't give you that much enjoyment. Try having zero spend days, that gets me out of spend mode.

 

[pacergal]

It appears financially you are doing well, but after your last raise, somehow developed a hole in your pocket that cash just slipped through on "things". Figuring out if those things are what you wish to spend your money on. Is this financial concern something you have talked with your wife about? What are her thoughts?

Try tracking every single cent for a month or two.
Look at what you are living on now and what you believe your income needs will be when you retire. (what age do you and your wife plan to retire?)
Under the forums section, there is a Frequently asked section; answer the questions in the thread:
Some Important Questions to Answer Before Asking - Can I Retire?

There are many books on investing, retirement, etc. on the bogleheads forum to learn from, or ask here. There are favorites among the posters here, and so many folks here will help with any questions you may have on specifics.

Keep plowing money in your retirement accounts, and daughters college fund.
Start an after tax account.
Pay more towards your mortgage if you wish.
Perhaps with your next raise, automatically save half and allow your self the other 50% for fun things--travel with family, fun experiences, etc.

Best wishes to you--it sounds like you are doing well for you and your family.

 

[pletal]

So, I'm a little financially frustrated with myself.



I started a new job about 14 months ago where I effectively doubled my income. I have no debt except for a mortgage, have a rental property, two pensions, and lots of 401k savings... so I'm not struggling to be sure. But with my new income, I quickly fell into the trap of living a lifestyle much higher than what I have normally accustomed myself to.


2 years ago, I wouldn't buy something if I hadn't budgeted for it, and I was good about making sure that I didn't impulse-buy. But lately, over the past year, I've been really "off the wagon" (or on it, or however that phrase goes). Now, I don't even look at prices, I just hand over my credit card. I don't think about it at the time, since I enjoy being able to provide a lifestyle for my family... but my daughter made a comment the other day that really snapped me into reality.


She's 14 and she said... "You know daddy, this is a lot of money, you should be saving."


Now, granted... she's saying this because she remembers the other 13 years of our life where we lived well, but financially responsibly. But her comments really hit home.


How is it that I've allowed myself to become so irresponsible with money? Again, I have no debt, I'm still maxing out 401k contributions, dumping a ton into my daughter's 529 every month, and even saving a little bit beyond that... but I'm trying to think about where it all went (I have Quicken), and I'm just shocked. Eating out, subscriptions, gym memberships, charity (which isn't bad of course), and just "stuff."



I know inflation has gone up considerably over the past two years, but if I had lived as if I was still making what I made 2 years ago, the doubling of my income would have allowed me to literally HALVE my mortgage, or add considerably to my savings.



I'm supposedly getting a promotion / pay increase, and a bonus next month... which will be substantial (to be clear, I work very hard), but it frustrates me how loose and irresponsible I've been. While I consider myself really lucky, I wonder what the best way to approach this with my family is.


I try to read "Debt - A Love Story" once a year to get me re-motivated (like watching Hoarders on A&E before you do a deep "spring cleaning"), but I'm just frustrated by lost opportunity. Like, I was literally getting ready to pay cash for a 1966 Mustang GT, and then was like... I work from home, I barely drive the cars I have. I already have two classic cars in storage units, what the hell is wrong with me?





I guess I'm looking for some admonishment, encouragement, and similar experiences / advice to get back on the right track. I'm 44 if that makes any difference. Oh yeah, I'm in Tampa, haven't lived in Fort Lauderdale for 8 years (I need to update my signature).



Thanks!

OK, I’m going to say it! Maybe you are sick of saving money. Sounds crazy, but for many of us it has become a hobby. A few months ago I realized I was bored with dealing with our personal finances. You are on the right track, sometimes more does not matter. I have been doing the savings routine for 40 years. Always hit my goals but am ready for a new hobby. You are still (at 44) in the acquiring stage. After I turned 55 I was bored with “stuff”, it started to own me. Have motorcycles I don’t ride and cars that hardly get driven. Sorry for the rant, you will figure it out.

 

[RobbieB]

Yeah, cycles.

You get a lotta dough and the "I want" kicks in. Then after a while it's "I'm not using this stuff anymore"

But, as long as your net worth keeps increasing you are not living over your means.

We enjoy eating out, it's a high point of the day. Yeah, it costs more than sammies at home but it's a high point of the day! Doing the "lunch & errand loop"

Something I dearly missed during the covid times when the restaurants were shut.

 

[kgtest]

So, I'm a little financially frustrated with myself.



I started a new job about 14 months ago where I effectively doubled my income. I have no debt except for a mortgage, have a rental property, two pensions, and lots of 401k savings... so I'm not struggling to be sure. But with my new income, I quickly fell into the trap of living a lifestyle much higher than what I have normally accustomed myself to.


2 years ago, I wouldn't buy something if I hadn't budgeted for it, and I was good about making sure that I didn't impulse-buy. But lately, over the past year, I've been really "off the wagon" (or on it, or however that phrase goes). Now, I don't even look at prices, I just hand over my credit card. I don't think about it at the time, since I enjoy being able to provide a lifestyle for my family... but my daughter made a comment the other day that really snapped me into reality.


She's 14 and she said... "You know daddy, this is a lot of money, you should be saving."


Now, granted... she's saying this because she remembers the other 13 years of our life where we lived well, but financially responsibly. But her comments really hit home.


How is it that I've allowed myself to become so irresponsible with money? Again, I have no debt, I'm still maxing out 401k contributions, dumping a ton into my daughter's 529 every month, and even saving a little bit beyond that... but I'm trying to think about where it all went (I have Quicken), and I'm just shocked. Eating out, subscriptions, gym memberships, charity (which isn't bad of course), and just "stuff."



I know inflation has gone up considerably over the past two years, but if I had lived as if I was still making what I made 2 years ago, the doubling of my income would have allowed me to literally HALVE my mortgage, or add considerably to my savings.



I'm supposedly getting a promotion / pay increase, and a bonus next month... which will be substantial (to be clear, I work very hard), but it frustrates me how loose and irresponsible I've been. While I consider myself really lucky, I wonder what the best way to approach this with my family is.


I try to read "Debt - A Love Story" once a year to get me re-motivated (like watching Hoarders on A&E before you do a deep "spring cleaning"), but I'm just frustrated by lost opportunity. Like, I was literally getting ready to pay cash for a 1966 Mustang GT, and then was like... I work from home, I barely drive the cars I have. I already have two classic cars in storage units, what the hell is wrong with me?





I guess I'm looking for some admonishment, encouragement, and similar experiences / advice to get back on the right track. I'm 44 if that makes any difference. Oh yeah, I'm in Tampa, haven't lived in Fort Lauderdale for 8 years (I need to update my signature).



Thanks!

I switched gears once my sister passed away at the young age of 47. Something just flipped in my brain and I started thinking, do I really need to have 3x my current spending in retirement? What if I die in 5 years due to cancer? I started living a little. I call it living life. I am still reaching my financial goals, just decided to spend a little now instead of later. 41, 3 kids. I spend a lot on the kids activities and vacations...making memories, and supporting them. Nothing wrong with this.

 

[Badger]

1. Can I ask, what does LAYM mean?
2. You also mentioned automating "principle payments," I didn't even know that was possible to do? I suppose that depends on the brokerage firm.
3. My mortgage is 3.125%, do you think it's worth it with such a low interest rate?

No advice just an observation. Given your spending on things consumable with no benefits toward retirement security why would this even be a concern?

Cheers!

 

[old medic]

Depends on how badly you want to ER vs. enjoying the fruits of your labor now......balance in life can be important too. Enjoying some stuff now while still putting away some money is not the end of the world.

Thats how I would look at it.

 

[HI Bill]

FWIW, here's what I did:

1. Pay off credit cards in full every month.
2. Take on no debt except mortgage or investments such as rental properties.
3. Automate 401(k) contributions, contributing the maximum each year.
4. Check Federal and State withholding after your first few paychecks. Adjust as necessary with a $0 due goal.
5. Record all transactions in an electronic checkbook register (aka Excel) or app. Including each credit card transaction. You'll always know how much $ you have left for the month, and in paying off your credit card bill, you can verify each transaction amount.
6. Track your NIA (net invested assets). I keep these on a single spreadsheet page and update ETF values daily from Yahoo! Finance, and I used to use MINT.
7. Make it a point (and game) to see how much you can save additionally to brokerage accounts monthly. I have a separate savings account tab on my SS, and typically put away $800-2500 'extra' monthly, if I didn't splurge on a trip. After I accumulated $5-10K, I'd sweep that into my brokerage account.
8. On your NIA tab, set your goal in $, and subtract from that your current NIA.

Market gains and contributions aren't linear, but this gives you an idea how far into the future your ER might be.

Good luck!

 

[cyber888]

So, I'm a little financially frustrated with myself.

2 years ago, I wouldn't buy something if I hadn't budgeted for it, and I was good about making sure that I didn't impulse-buy. But lately, over the past year, I've been really "off the wagon" (or on it, or however that phrase goes). Now, I don't even look at prices, I just hand over my credit card.

Thanks!

Maybe a mid-life crisis? Or just a splurge phase in your life?
I remember I had went into that phase and I regret and learned from it.
Back some 10 years ago, I bought a brand new V8 Audi sports car for $60K+. In 2012, that was an expense sports car, which would be around $95K+ in today money (2023) for the same type of car. After 2-3 years, the value of that car depreciated by $25K. I learned my lesson pretty well. After that, I bought slightly used cars, and let the others take the $15K-$20K depreciation, and have never bought another car in the last 8-9 years.

So maybe your daughter is your wake up call, and you need to rethink priorities.

In 4 months, I will be retiring early this year.

 

[Shanky]

So, I'm a little financially frustrated with myself.



I started a new job about 14 months ago where I effectively doubled my income. I have no debt except for a mortgage, have a rental property, two pensions, and lots of 401k savings... so I'm not struggling to be sure. But with my new income, I quickly fell into the trap of living a lifestyle much higher than what I have normally accustomed myself to.


2 years ago, I wouldn't buy something if I hadn't budgeted for it, and I was good about making sure that I didn't impulse-buy. But lately, over the past year, I've been really "off the wagon" (or on it, or however that phrase goes). Now, I don't even look at prices, I just hand over my credit card. I don't think about it at the time, since I enjoy being able to provide a lifestyle for my family... but my daughter made a comment the other day that really snapped me into reality.


She's 14 and she said... "You know daddy, this is a lot of money, you should be saving."


Now, granted... she's saying this because she remembers the other 13 years of our life where we lived well, but financially responsibly. But her comments really hit home.


How is it that I've allowed myself to become so irresponsible with money? Again, I have no debt, I'm still maxing out 401k contributions, dumping a ton into my daughter's 529 every month, and even saving a little bit beyond that... but I'm trying to think about where it all went (I have Quicken), and I'm just shocked. Eating out, subscriptions, gym memberships, charity (which isn't bad of course), and just "stuff."



I know inflation has gone up considerably over the past two years, but if I had lived as if I was still making what I made 2 years ago, the doubling of my income would have allowed me to literally HALVE my mortgage, or add considerably to my savings.



I'm supposedly getting a promotion / pay increase, and a bonus next month... which will be substantial (to be clear, I work very hard), but it frustrates me how loose and irresponsible I've been. While I consider myself really lucky, I wonder what the best way to approach this with my family is.


I try to read "Debt - A Love Story" once a year to get me re-motivated (like watching Hoarders on A&E before you do a deep "spring cleaning"), but I'm just frustrated by lost opportunity. Like, I was literally getting ready to pay cash for a 1966 Mustang GT, and then was like... I work from home, I barely drive the cars I have. I already have two classic cars in storage units, what the hell is wrong with me?





I guess I'm looking for some admonishment, encouragement, and similar experiences / advice to get back on the right track. I'm 44 if that makes any difference. Oh yeah, I'm in Tampa, haven't lived in Fort Lauderdale for 8 years (I need to update my signature).



Thanks!

OP, I am retired now over 6 years and I can relate to your situation. In my late 30’s my career progressed to the point that spending what I made seemed impossible. But Fancy cars, boarding school and Ivy league for the kiddo’s, Country Club, International Travel & a boat / yacht and hitting that high marginal tax rate while living in California and all of a sudden, I was “keeping” up with my so-called peers. I realized that if I wanted to retire at a reasonable age, I had to modify our lifestyle.

The good news, is we were not “financing” our lifestyle but it was spendy. When I hit my mid 40’s, we decided to starting living on the income we were planning on for our retirement and saving the rest. My wife was always frugal anyway since she had stopped working in 1988 as we were having kids. We literally started living on 25% of my income. We downsized to a smaller boat, kids got through college and we ultimately moved away from California. By the time I actually retired at age 56 we were positive we had “enough”.

Not a single regret retiring early and stepping away from the “high rolling” lifestyle.

 

[SunGuy]

Read the book 'Your Money or Your Life' and 'early retirement extreme'.

They go a long way in connecting the dots to help you learn what to do.

Think about every dollar you invest for the future like it is going into a magic box that for every dollar you put inside you get at least $5 back in 20-30+ years.

You would be a fool to not want to maximize every possible $1 you could place inside.

I have told countless people this over the years and used to run an old school blog about it too, coined the term for Future Daily Dividend Income (FDDI).

Where you equate your yearly dividend income into a daily motivational number:
$X in yearly income / 365 days in a year = FDDI , so for example $500 a year in dividends gives you an FDDI of $1.37 round up from $1.36986.

This is an empowering and life changing realization that will help you take control of your financial future.

 

[imnontrad]

Okay, take a mulligan.
Plan for that projected raise. Put saving for the future first and live on what is left. This means setting aside in 401Ks, individual IRAs, HSA (if eligible), 529 account(s). AND taxable portfolio/emergency fund (if you have a high salary and then lose your job, it may take longer and even a move for the next job). Then live on the remaining balance and enjoy it.
Then yes, set a budget. Concentrate on paying off loans (except home), have sinking funds for future large expenses (car, house repairs), plus adequate insurance (including disability and umbrella). Maybe consider helping your kids learn about saving by offering to reimburse them for all that they put into their Roth due to their employment or own business (even an 8YO can have a business).
If you do all that. I can pretty much guarantee that you will be able to weather a lot of the downs in life and still be able to retire early if you want.