thefed
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2005
- Messages
- 2,203
My dad's girlfriend of 5 years suddenly died this morning. She had been in ICU for 2 days after collapsing on the living room floor the other night. My dad came downstairs to find her lifeless....the medics revived her and machines sustained her for a few days.
My dad is 52. He's been married 3 times, and this time, he and his gf decided neither wanted to marry again for the sake of pleasing everyone else...instead they'd just live together and carry on as though they were married. She was his first girlfriend at age 13, they did see each other for 30 years, and then rekindled their relationship 5 yrs ago. They were perfect for one another...and for someone to be perfect for my ol' man...that says a lot (he's a gruff, difficult guy).
Rose had a myriad of health issues, but they have no idea what happened the other night....they hope an autopsy shed's some light. She was only 51.
I CAN NOT IMAGINE what he is going through. The best he could describe it is comparing it to when my current fince and I split up for a few months....the feelings of despair and sorrow I had because I thought it was over for good....multiply it by 10. I was a total wreck...didnt eat, talk, sleep, nothing.
What is he going to do every day when he comes home? Who's he going to bitch at (lol)?? He said he woke up today and felt completely lost for the first time in many,many years...with no direction or desire to do anything. I didnt even know her 1/2 as well as he did, and I did the same thing...laid in bed wondering why. I grieved my father's loneliness more than her death....if that makes any sense.
It hurts so bad to know how lonely he will be. He's the kind of guy to decide at 6pm he's going on a road trip 400 miels from home, and he'd leave the next morning.....she'd be right with him. She sort of took my place on those trips as i grew older and moved out of the house.
If anyone has any advice on what I can do to help him cope, please enlighten me. My main concerns are his loneliness, and the 1 in 10000 chance he decides life sucks so bad that he picks up a bottle and starts drinking (sober for 20 years, ruined his marraige and life when i was 2 yrs old). I live 40 miles away, and can visit, but i am very busy myself. All he has left is his mother, who is old and not in good helath. His father just died 10 months ago and he didnt take that too well. He ha 2 sisters who live near, but they arent too close.
Thanks for letting me vent....
My dad is 52. He's been married 3 times, and this time, he and his gf decided neither wanted to marry again for the sake of pleasing everyone else...instead they'd just live together and carry on as though they were married. She was his first girlfriend at age 13, they did see each other for 30 years, and then rekindled their relationship 5 yrs ago. They were perfect for one another...and for someone to be perfect for my ol' man...that says a lot (he's a gruff, difficult guy).
Rose had a myriad of health issues, but they have no idea what happened the other night....they hope an autopsy shed's some light. She was only 51.
I CAN NOT IMAGINE what he is going through. The best he could describe it is comparing it to when my current fince and I split up for a few months....the feelings of despair and sorrow I had because I thought it was over for good....multiply it by 10. I was a total wreck...didnt eat, talk, sleep, nothing.
What is he going to do every day when he comes home? Who's he going to bitch at (lol)?? He said he woke up today and felt completely lost for the first time in many,many years...with no direction or desire to do anything. I didnt even know her 1/2 as well as he did, and I did the same thing...laid in bed wondering why. I grieved my father's loneliness more than her death....if that makes any sense.
It hurts so bad to know how lonely he will be. He's the kind of guy to decide at 6pm he's going on a road trip 400 miels from home, and he'd leave the next morning.....she'd be right with him. She sort of took my place on those trips as i grew older and moved out of the house.
If anyone has any advice on what I can do to help him cope, please enlighten me. My main concerns are his loneliness, and the 1 in 10000 chance he decides life sucks so bad that he picks up a bottle and starts drinking (sober for 20 years, ruined his marraige and life when i was 2 yrs old). I live 40 miles away, and can visit, but i am very busy myself. All he has left is his mother, who is old and not in good helath. His father just died 10 months ago and he didnt take that too well. He ha 2 sisters who live near, but they arent too close.
Thanks for letting me vent....