My siblings and I are all adults now. Our parents don't talk much about inheritance, but whatever may or may not come will include a letter from my father that describes his wishes that any inheritance be invested wisely and not consumed faster than 4% per year. He did something similar with college funds and asked that any leftovers be held for future education or education of future generations. The smallish bit of funds left over from my education could have been easily spent on whatever, but instead it now makes a nice start on my kids' college 20+ years later.
I'm planning to do something similar. For now, my kids are minors and while I'm not planning on them inheriting from me anytime soon, if they do my main concerns are using the money to raise them properly. It goes into a trust with a very trusted relative with broad latitude to do the right thing. If they make it past 30 before inheriting, they get the money outright with a suitable 4% letter attached. Not enforceable from the great beyond, but hopefully simple enough guidance that they will treat it responsibly. I suppose if they do anything to alarm me in the next few years I might add more strings, but for now this seems sufficient. I know the college request was enough for me in my early 20's, so I'm hopeful it will work for them.
It is also set up so that any money inherited doesn't become community property should they marry.
