yakers
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
When did your father/mother see you as an adult/equal?
IN another thread NYEXPAt said
This triggered my thinking, when did my father 'see me as a man'? I remember a discussion with a college processor. His father did not see him as a man/adult/equal when he finished school, got a job or got married, it was only when he bought a house.
For others it may be education, marriage, parenthood or financial achievement. For me it was not until I turned 30 and started doing charitable work, became a Big Brother and other activities. Until then he felt I was cruising with others looking four for me or just looking after myself.
Also my father was very debt adverse, a survivor of the depression. Although he had passed away years earlier I sort of felt his presence when I made my final mortgage payment.
IN another thread NYEXPAt said
When I graduated college, I assumed I would go to work at his firm. I still remember my Father laughing and saying "why would I pay you for what you do not know"? Like many lessons, I did not realize he was right till much later.
I remember him being proud when my "net worth" exceeded his.
But, that's when I realized I was trying to please him and not myself.
This triggered my thinking, when did my father 'see me as a man'? I remember a discussion with a college processor. His father did not see him as a man/adult/equal when he finished school, got a job or got married, it was only when he bought a house.
For others it may be education, marriage, parenthood or financial achievement. For me it was not until I turned 30 and started doing charitable work, became a Big Brother and other activities. Until then he felt I was cruising with others looking four for me or just looking after myself.
Also my father was very debt adverse, a survivor of the depression. Although he had passed away years earlier I sort of felt his presence when I made my final mortgage payment.