My mom is retired, two of my aunts are retired, one of my wife's aunt is retired and guess what those 60-70 year old retirees do all day?
They babysit their grand children. "Ah the joy of grand-motherhood! Those are the lucky ones who get to enjoy time with their grand children!" Well except that they are starting not to anymore. They are exhausted, they are stressed out, they have no time for themselves and they sometime break a hip while chasing the little one through the house.
The problem is, my mom and our aunts have de facto become nannies. They are expected to take care of the grand kids several days a week. DW's aunt is actually a live-in nanny, spending several nights a week away from her husband in order to relieve her daughter-in-law from the stress of motherhood. The grandmothers feed the kids, bathe them, take them to school, take them to the doctor and even meet with teachers. So where are the parents? Are they employed in some high flying careers with little time for child rearing? Nope. In every single case, one of the parents is a stay-at-home parent. That's right. But the stay-at-home-parents dump the kids on granny's lap so that they can have some "me time". Time to surf the web, take a nap, go shopping, go to the movies with friends, etc... I mean, when your kids are in school all day, how much more free time do you need to goof around? It seems crazy to me.
I do feel bad for my mom. My retirement, at age 36, is a lot more relaxing than hers, at age 64. I love my niece to pieces, but after babysitting her for 4 hours straight, I am so exhausted I can barely keep my eyes open. How can my mom possibly do it at her age, day after day after day? Well it's more than a struggle.
So why don't they just say "no"? Guilt is certainly involved. They don't want to "reject" their grand children. And little Timmy is "so happy to spend time at granny's", how could they possibly refuse? And just like that, they have lost control of their retirement.
*I am a worthless, childless infidel who knows nothing about the joy of parenthood. I thought I'd put it out there before some well-intentioned poster felt the need to remind me of that fact.
They babysit their grand children. "Ah the joy of grand-motherhood! Those are the lucky ones who get to enjoy time with their grand children!" Well except that they are starting not to anymore. They are exhausted, they are stressed out, they have no time for themselves and they sometime break a hip while chasing the little one through the house.
The problem is, my mom and our aunts have de facto become nannies. They are expected to take care of the grand kids several days a week. DW's aunt is actually a live-in nanny, spending several nights a week away from her husband in order to relieve her daughter-in-law from the stress of motherhood. The grandmothers feed the kids, bathe them, take them to school, take them to the doctor and even meet with teachers. So where are the parents? Are they employed in some high flying careers with little time for child rearing? Nope. In every single case, one of the parents is a stay-at-home parent. That's right. But the stay-at-home-parents dump the kids on granny's lap so that they can have some "me time". Time to surf the web, take a nap, go shopping, go to the movies with friends, etc... I mean, when your kids are in school all day, how much more free time do you need to goof around? It seems crazy to me.
I do feel bad for my mom. My retirement, at age 36, is a lot more relaxing than hers, at age 64. I love my niece to pieces, but after babysitting her for 4 hours straight, I am so exhausted I can barely keep my eyes open. How can my mom possibly do it at her age, day after day after day? Well it's more than a struggle.
So why don't they just say "no"? Guilt is certainly involved. They don't want to "reject" their grand children. And little Timmy is "so happy to spend time at granny's", how could they possibly refuse? And just like that, they have lost control of their retirement.
*I am a worthless, childless infidel who knows nothing about the joy of parenthood. I thought I'd put it out there before some well-intentioned poster felt the need to remind me of that fact.