Just wondering if most couples have their own stash/investments etc.? We do but also call it ours. I do have a few different numbers when looking at my portfolio each month. When I give my gains each month or compare number etc. on a post here, I just use what I have invested. Hers is not used in the calculations.
So, in reality our numbers are different if I would combine them. In general that total portfolio would be larger but not necessary much difference in percentage for the month or year.
So, what is your style?
At the very beginning of our marriage, we went with hers, mine, and ours. That even included checking accounts with the "hers" and "mine" each having an allowance for spending no questions asked and "ours" being used to pay bills.
After a year, we decided that was total nonsense and was a consequence of each of us being independent for a decade or so after college. If we couldn't trust each other on our spending and to discuss larger purchases in advance, then we were broken before we really even got started. So we simplified to a single checking account.
Investments were a little different. At the time, we were both working, so we had an "ours" taxable account, but each had our own 401K's. Across the board, together, we figured out what we wanted to do in each account. This was the early 90's.
Flash forward to today. I'm still working and she's retired. 401K's from former employers are now in each of our rollover IRAs. We have joint taxable accounts and I have a 401K which I'll roll over to my IRA when I retire. By mutual agreement, I manage all of it and treat it all as a single AA, with some very small exceptions. That means that each individual account doesn't hold the same AA, but the overall AA is managed. I have a very detailed IPS written down that she has reviewed and understands. We do a quick update on where things stand once per quarter and a bigger review of the year during the Christmas holidays so that everybody knows the same thing.
At the end of the day, it's about trust and being on the same page, financially. And since it's a community property state, if the worst happens, it really won't matter the exact content of my IRA or her IRA.