Too Frugal - Anybody Else Struggle Spending Too LITTLE?

[RobbieB]

They all look very happy and looking forward to a good meal.

I love the guy with the penis tusk thing, gonna have to get one of those.

 

[NW-Bound]

^^^ The penile sheath is called a "koteka".

See: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Koteka

You may be able to buy one on the Web, instead of having to go all the way to New Guinea for this souvenir.

And in keeping with the thread, perhaps you can get one that's made of gold, instead of a gourd. However, gold is heavy, and would not be comfortable to wear.

 

[RobbieB]

Yeah, get me one on Amazon. Gotta be a big hit at Karaoke night.

 

[teetee]

That is amazingly low! When do you intend to retire??

Hopefully sometime between 2028 and 2030.

 

[pacergal]

Well, those last several posts were an interesting thread drift!

 

[Chuckanut]

I think instead of 'life expectancy' people should consider how much 'fun time' they'll have to spend. My mom is 92, in great health and sharp as a tack (still drives!) but she couldn't spend $20K a year if her life depended on it. She now just likes to sit around, read a book, watch TV and take a nap. The most she does is go out to dinner and get her hair done.

My mom also. And she really enjoyed getting her hair done and going out to eat. If she was with the grand kids it was even better.

I received some good advice in my mid 60's from a couple in their early 70's. They were doing a lot of traveling, often 4 or more major trips each year. The told me that they observed that their older friends and relatives 'slowed down' once they hit 80. So they were going to milk their 70's for everything they could get.

My big problem with that is that as I approach the time to do more milking, this darn corona virus is making it harder to get to the barn.

 

[aja8888]

Yeah, get me one on Amazon. Gotta be a big hit at Karaoke night.

Wifey still has time to get you one for Christmas. Drop her a hint!

 

[SheitlQueen]

Same for me. Raised by parents who went through the depression and were extremely frugal. Passed that onto me. Of course, being frugal allowed me to save and retire early. I've been retired six years and I'm still cheap. I have more money than I can ever possibly spend in my lifetime. But I still try to watch what I spend. I have loosened up the last couple of years and started spending money on travel. Over all my needs are not that extravagant and I'm not a big spender.

 

[Sunset]

Still very frugal, even though I don't need to be. A few years ago, I allowed myself to spend 'big money' on craft beer at $25 a case. But now the same stuff is $39 a case, and I can't (won't) do that. I do allow myself to buy lots of craft beer on sale, however. I am comfortable spending 'big bucks' as in flying somewhere for vacation, but it has to be a good discount deal, for me to be happy spending it.

Same here..

I'm happy to book a nice cheap on sale 7 day trip to Alaska this summer, about $2,500 in total.

But I used to drink Canadian Club Rye $18, and after reading a bunch upgraded to Bulleit 95% at $42 for 1.75L , a couple of months ago the price was jacked up to $49 and I stopped buying it.

Hard to break frugal habits..

 

[Sunset]

When I worked in Big Oil I flew first class all the time. Then 30 years having my own company, I flew coach unless I got upgraded which was very frequently. I was in ALL the airline Frequent Flyer programs over the years and a Million Miler in two of them. I flew so much I hated it.

I still hate it and any U.S. travel we are planning, is driving trip. No more airplanes and airports for me.

BTW, i still have airline points and a ton of hotel points after ll these years. I give them away to family member if they need to make a trip.

I lost my points for 1 airline as I forgot about it. It was worth a couple of trips so slightly disappointing.

 

[aja8888]

I lost my points for 1 airline as I forgot about it. It was worth a couple of trips so slightly disappointing.

I almost lost some on American when they, and others, put time lines on use of points, but I gave those points to my DD for a visit to see her cousins. The balance went to magazine subscriptions! I have some lifetime points left on United and that's it, but a lot of hotel points.

 

[marko]

I received some good advice in my mid 60's from a couple in their early 70's. They were doing a lot of traveling, often 4 or more major trips each year. The told me that they observed that their older friends and relatives 'slowed down' once they hit 80. So they were going to milk their 70's for everything they could get.

.

I"ve mentioned here a few times about an older guy I met in a tavern 10 years ago.

He said: "You're 60? Enjoy it now. Even if you live to be 90 all you've got is 15 more years...18 tops before you start to slow down, don't want to do what you now like to do, lose interest in other things and so on."

 

[OverThinkMuch]

Unfortunately, it's just ingrained in me to be frugal, which has also impacted my life and my relationships.
...
How does one overcome these kinds of struggles?

What is your favorite activity or hobby? Let's say you like to listen to music. What I did is to create a budget - no, not that kind. I created a SPENDING budget! Meaning, I would force myself to spend some very small amount each month, like $10 on mp3s.

I really liked some of the music I bought - and without this spending budget, I wouldn't have done any buying. So I had the experience of spending money on something I really liked, and realizing this money was better spent than saved.

I would encourage that approach, but start with an amount so small you have no problems spending it. The idea isn't to stress over how much you're spending, but to push you to spend a tiny amount.

 

[Midpack]

According to every calculator I've tried, we're spending (far) too little, and we haven't even started Soc Sec or RMDs yet and I am paying HUGE taxes doing Roth conversions. But we live comfortably, and treat ourselves occasionally, so we don't have any need to spend more just to spend more. And there is NO WAY to know how our portfolio will hold up over the next 20-30 years, no calculator or FA can predict the future so there is no way to know if you're actually spending too little until you go poof (whenever that comes). That said, I will admit it's very hard to balance present spending with future spending. It would be nice to spend more now while we're still healthy and reasonably active. Having a bunch of excess funds when we get really old and we're not as healthy or active won't do us any good, and we don't have kids to throw it at - it will probably all go to charities and nieces and nephews.

 

[aja8888]

I"ve mentioned here a few times about an older guy I met in a tavern 10 years ago.

He said: "You're 60? Enjoy it now. Even if you live to be 90 all you've got is 15 more years...18 tops before you start to slow down, don't want to do what you now like to do, lose interest in other things and so on."

Uhhh...you ...mean...I...am...right...there......? (@ 78)

 

[street]

Midpack, you have a good problem to have, that a lot of people would like to have. On the other hand, that good problem can be a problem in later years.

If we didn't have our son and his family to hand down a legacy too. We would be doing things a lot different when it comes to spending.

 

[brett]

What helped me get over it. Wrote a nice cheque to each of our children last Christmas.

Wrote a substantial cheque to my daughter and SIL a few months ago to help then acquire a business and residential property. Spouse encouraged it. It can down to you cannot take it with you. No appreciable financial impact on us. Only one condition....they don't mention it to anyone. Even us.

Next month...deposits in each of the three grandchildren's edu accounts.

Having said that....I will not pay a dime more than I have to for some of our basic grocery and personal care items. So the frugal is still there, or should I say the value shopping.

 

[street]

brett, that is one way to break the ice, so to speak. Giving to family or charity seems to be easier to spend then on anything else. I try each day to get the best deal I can, frugal will never go away. Lol

 

[RetiredHappy]

We spend alot but I also like to get a good bargain. I accumulate airline miles, some through conversions from timeshare, hotel points and cash back. We do quite alot of international travel until COVID hits and we haven't gotten back to Europe and Asia. Most of our business class tickets to/from international destinations are through miles. We also enjoy transatlantic cruises, which takes care of one way, and we only need to pay for the other trip back home.

I am Marriott Titanium which means we get lots of hotel suite upgrades in Europe, although their suite certificates are pretty worthless in US and Asia. We use timeshare in nice places which would have cost us alot more. For instance, we just spent 8 nights in a 2BR villas in Westin Kierland in Scottsdale AZ. If we paid rack rate to Marriott, it would have cost us $7K for the stay. Instead, my annual maintenance fees cost me about $1300 for the stay. In April of this year, we stayed in an ocean view 2BR villas at Marriott's Ko Olina in Oahu for 2 weeks. It cost me about $2.5K while I would have paid about $15K if we had booked through Marriott.com. Flights were in first class using airline miles.

There are some things which we don't get a bargain, like country club or dining out. We only buy USDA prime grade beef and organic produce and meat as much as we can find them.

 

[NW-Bound]

I"ve mentioned here a few times about an older guy I met in a tavern 10 years ago.

He said: "You're 60? Enjoy it now. Even if you live to be 90 all you've got is 15 more years...18 tops before you start to slow down, don't want to do what you now like to do, lose interest in other things and so on."

Uhhh...you ...mean...I...am...right...there......? (@ 78)

Of course, you are.

You just said in the earlier post that you no longer want to travel, and that you have seen enough.

 

[aja8888]

Of course, you are.

You just said in the earlier post that you no longer want to travel, and that you have seen enough.

Well, that's just travel. I'm burned out on airlines and visiting paces.

There's a lot of other stuff I do. I play a good bit of golf each week, do my own yard maintenance, walk an average of 10,000 steps per day, up at 6:30 AM every day, etc.

Oh, I'm also the caretaker for my handicapped wife, which is getting harder to do and is another reason why I am "local" all the time.

I'm far from slowing down to an old man's creep!!

 

[The Cosmic Avenger]

But I used to drink Canadian Club Rye $18, and after reading a bunch upgraded to Bulleit 95% at $42 for 1.75L , a couple of months ago the price was jacked up to $49 and I stopped buying it.

Hard to break frugal habits..

Heck, I still have Canadian Club whiskey on my bar! I've also got some very good scotch, but I am not quite at the BTD point where I'll drink 20+ year single malt every night!

When I was a big firm lawyer in NYC, I would fly all over the country to meet people, take depositions and go to court. Sometimes, acquaintances would say "that must be fun to get to travel so much". No, no it wasn't. Every time was a mad dash to the airport at the last minute, a miserable flight to somewhere, do my business and zip back to NYC as soon as possible. The only things I ever saw were the insides of planes and airport terminals, the back of the cab, law firm conference rooms, courtrooms, and occasionally the most convenient hotel, where I spent all my time reading documents, eating room service and preparing for the next day. Everything looked the same, and it was just plain drudgery.

I will fly to go on vacation, but only because I must.

That's too bad. When I had work trips, they were to work the booth at conferences, and after one trip where something didn't show up and a replacement had to be rushed, I started being able to justify flying in a day before setup to check the shipment. The conference hours were sometimes 3-4 hours a day, but even when it was 6-8, we'd have the rest of the evening to explore. And a few times I paid for an additional day or three at the hotel and I was still able to expense my airfare both ways, so I got a few very cheap vacations out of them.

 

[Midpack]

Midpack, you have a good problem to have, that a lot of people would like to have. On the other hand, that good problem can be a problem in later years.

If we didn't have our son and his family to hand down a legacy too. We would be doing things a lot different when it comes to spending.

Understood, we’re fortunate and grateful.

 

[tb001]

We spend alot but I also like to get a good bargain. I accumulate airline miles, some through conversions from timeshare, hotel points and cash back. We do quite alot of international travel until COVID hits and we haven't gotten back to Europe and Asia. Most of our business class tickets to/from international destinations are through miles. We also enjoy transatlantic cruises, which takes care of one way, and we only need to pay for the other trip back home.

I am Marriott Titanium which means we get lots of hotel suite upgrades in Europe, although their suite certificates are pretty worthless in US and Asia. We use timeshare in nice places which would have cost us alot more. For instance, we just spent 8 nights in a 2BR villas in Westin Kierland in Scottsdale AZ. If we paid rack rate to Marriott, it would have cost us $7K for the stay. Instead, my annual maintenance fees cost me about $1300 for the stay. In April of this year, we stayed in an ocean view 2BR villas at Marriott's Ko Olina in Oahu for 2 weeks. It cost me about $2.5K while I would have paid about $15K if we had booked through Marriott.com. Flights were in first class using airline miles.

There are some things which we don't get a bargain, like country club or dining out. We only buy USDA prime grade beef and organic produce and meat as much as we can find them.

Ok, as someone who has always run from anything timeshare, I’m curious. How does this work?

 

[Rocky mtn high]

I am talking to myself really but, five years ago I told my siblings we have 10 good summers yet better get to doing things! They all laughed at me. Sure enough DW diagnosis of early breast cancer ruined this summer with surgeries. As a friend told me you have get things done now because when you turn 70, he said all your doing is patching yourself up. SO GET TO SPENDING MONEY!! I still have hard time doing it.