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Old 08-14-2014, 09:00 AM   #21
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Since you say she doesn't like her job, and her concerns are financial, then hopefully reducing your risk will provide her some peace of mind. However, maybe there's more to her hesitation than just fear of being poor. Does she have interests to pursue in retirement? If it will help her to be happier, then maybe you can find some activities to pursue together that she'll want more than work and more money. It may be hard to draw her away from the need to acquire more, though, even if you believe it will make her happier. It's seriously hard to define "enough" for ourselves.

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Old 08-14-2014, 09:10 AM   #22
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I was in the same boat as you (but without $4m) and was having a hard time convincing DW to retire. 2 things worked for me. She had some friends pass away in their 50's that helped persuade her. And a couple of financial advisors wanting her IRA rollover told her it was ok to retire now.

You're going to need some outside help in convincing your DW. The Vanguard route described above, or set up a meeting with a financial planner to get his/her take on it.

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Old 08-14-2014, 09:58 AM   #23
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DW has consistently not gotten involved in retirement planning or investing. I've bashed her over the head (figuratively ) to get her acquainted with our investments and DIY methodology. Now with my retirement being announced within the family, she has also started developing cold feet.

Part 1 is that I had to show her FireCalc and i-ORP runs showing spending levels safely above what we are currently spending (almost 2x actually) although she didn't get into the details. It made her more comfortable at stopping the paycheck.

Part 2 is that she's now harping on variations of "what will you do all day?" She talks about things I or we could do together involving volunteering. My reply is "what does she do all day?" She's been "retired" for 8 years and hasn't felt the need to develop a more structured life like she seems to think I need.

I'm also having a bit of mental adjustment underway to the dreaded day that I also take money out of my investments. I suspect I will adjust but I really hope we don't have any 20+% drops between now and this time next year. I'm sure a normal correction that occurs when I'm facing retirement or just afterwards will definitely shake me up.
The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane -- Marcus Aurelius
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Old 08-14-2014, 10:15 AM   #24
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That is funny that she keeps herself busy all day to her liking just fine, but she's worried about what YOU will do all day. I'm sure part of it is that she'll no longer have the house all to herself. That's quite a change.
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Old 08-14-2014, 11:48 AM   #25
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Originally Posted by audreyh1 View Post
That is funny that she keeps herself busy all day to her liking just fine, but she's worried about what YOU will do all day. I'm sure part of it is that she'll no longer have the house all to herself. That's quite a change.
That was a big worry for my mother, a SAHM. The solution was to introduce my father to golf a few years before ER. It became his passion. He even won a trophy!

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