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A household in transition ...[Kids Leave the Nest]
Old 08-04-2017, 04:36 AM   #1
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A household in transition ...[Kids Leave the Nest]

My oldest is at the end of her first week in a real job. She's out the door at 6:45AM and rolls in before 6pm. I know the secret out the door early in the summer is no big deal. It is light and warm out. Come December it will be another animal entirely. Welcome daughter to the real world.

My son will leave for college 2 weeks from today. He too will have to deal with a schedule of 9am classes. He normally sleeps to noon after a late night of 'gaming'.

I am enjoying my 3rd week of a 3 day work week. I still get up early I guess I always will. I still have a kind of guilt, why do I deserve it so good? But 40 years of work deserves something eh? I'll get over it.

I wonder what others felt those first few weeks on the glide path to retirement.
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Old 08-04-2017, 05:00 AM   #2
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LOL, you'll get over it really quick.

My funniest moment was when I went on vacation the first time without the minions. The look on their faces was priceless. Yes sweetie when you start a new job you only get 1 or 2 weeks vacation and no it doesn't look good to take off 3 days after starting.

as you said, welcome to the real world.

I have a p/t gig that is real flexible so it's funny on some mornings when I'm up drinking tea and they come into the kitchen and say, "you don't have to work"? NOPE.
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Old 08-04-2017, 05:30 AM   #3
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Mine is not a glide path, but a gentle glide over mountains and down into valleys. Yep, still in the hunt, but it feels like a great several years transition.

Sitting in the comfort of home office, I will phone in a few hours, and attend to more important items, like this post.

My daughter and son have each transitioned out of the home. Son for 10 years, daughter for a few. Knowing we are FI is a certain amount of satisfaction. But the feelings for children is definitely a higher plateau for parents.

Daughter and I surprised Mom for an unscheduled dinner. After dinner, daughter turns to me and asks, "Dad, do you miss going to all those soccer tournaments?"


There was a lot of pushing and pulling to get kids to a 1000 events over the years, and most were enjoyable...
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Old 08-04-2017, 06:42 AM   #4
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My funniest moment was when I went on vacation the first time without the minions. The look on their faces was priceless. Yes sweetie when you start a new job you only get 1 or 2 weeks vacation and no it doesn't look good to take off 3 days after starting.

No Hunny people don't bring young adults on those celebrity river cruises in Europe. ...
With good reason.
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Old 08-04-2017, 07:57 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by rayinpenn View Post

I still get up early I guess I always will.
DF retired 25 years ago, but he still woke up to an alarm clock at 6:00 every day. It was what he was used to doing.

OTOH, that won't be me. When I RE, I intend to let nature tell me when to get up. I've spent a lifetime reluctantly submitting to someone else's schedule, but when the paycheck ceases so will the morning alarm.
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Old 08-04-2017, 09:58 AM   #6
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My oldest is at the end of her first week in a real job. She's out the door at 6:45AM and rolls in before 6pm. I know the secret out the door early in the summer is no big deal. It is light and warm out. Come December it will be another animal entirely. Welcome daughter to the real world.

My son will leave for college 2 weeks from today. He too will have to deal with a schedule of 9am classes. He normally sleeps to noon after a late night of 'gaming'.

I am enjoying my 3rd week of a 3 day work week. I still get up early I guess I always will. I still have a kind of guilt, why do I deserve it so good? But 40 years of work deserves something eh? I'll get over it.

I wonder what others felt those first few weeks on the glide path to retirement.
Ray, when we set the clocks back and it gets dark out at 440 PM, You could, go to the daughters job site and make sure she gets into the car ok. And you could call your son at 815 am and make sure he is up and showered getting ready for his first class. Im sure they will both be just fine, but if ya need things to do...
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Old 08-04-2017, 10:44 AM   #7
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DS left for college 10 years ago this month. That was tough. It's been a continual transition ever since. DD left 3 years later. During college, DS stayed with us for 2 summers and DD for 1. Otherwise they've been living on their own. They're both gainfully employed, doing well, and live within an hour's drive.

I retired when DD was in her final year of college. DW followed 3 years later. Now we have grand-kids, so we babysit frequently and the house is once again full of highchairs, cribs, and brightly-colored plastic things. That's been weird. DW and I are adapting to being around each other all day. We're each finding our routine and try not to pester the other too much. So far, so good.
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Old 08-04-2017, 11:33 AM   #8
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We had no retirement transition challenges. We sold the house, stored our belongings, and traveled for seven months.

It had the effect of really clearing the cobwebs and changing how we thought and to a large extent how we lived. It was a great retirement tonic for us. Changed our life for the better.
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Old 08-04-2017, 01:43 PM   #9
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Just got back from visiting a top college candidate for our youngest, a leisurely 9 hours away.

Hopefully they'll get the scholarship they need to attend, since out of state public schools often cost as much as in-state private.
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Old 08-04-2017, 02:23 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by rayinpenn View Post
My oldest is at the end of her first week in a real job. She's out the door at 6:45AM and rolls in before 6pm. I know the secret out the door early in the summer is no big deal. It is light and warm out. Come December it will be another animal entirely. Welcome daughter to the real world.

My son will leave for college 2 weeks from today. He too will have to deal with a schedule of 9am classes. He normally sleeps to noon after a late night of 'gaming'.

I am enjoying my 3rd week of a 3 day work week. I still get up early I guess I always will. I still have a kind of guilt, why do I deserve it so good? But 40 years of work deserves something eh? I'll get over it.

I wonder what others felt those first few weeks on the glide path to retirement.
Thank you so much for the reflective way you bring up issues/challenges that happen to many of us during life's transitions. Always brings a smile of recognition!

I retired from the career 17 years ago with young children. But in a few week the youngest starts college.
No more 6am wake-ups to see him off to school.
No more involvement in the school soccer program after 7 years (coach for two, boosters for 5).
No more Fall soccer (school or club) after 12 years of practices and games.

Since I retired early to being a soccer Dad (may be on my last minivan), I am now making the transition to being more traditionally retired and for day to day purposes, an empty nester, searching for things to do (other than visit e-r.org). And most of my social contacts were related to the boys' activities and parents 20 years my junior.

It's been a great experience, but now time for the boys to make their own way on a day-to-day basis........me and my wife got to find another life for ourselves!
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A household in transition ...
Old 08-05-2017, 07:07 AM   #11
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A household in transition ...

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Originally Posted by Blue Collar Guy View Post
And you could call your son at 815 am and make sure he is up and showered getting ready for his first class. Im sure they will both be just fine, but if ya need things to do...

BCG...Thanks for the morning laugh.. they are always appreciated. This morning my internal alarm clock got me up at 5. [The stiffness in the right knee makes getting comfortable and falling back asleep all but impossible. Or it could be that I like my dad I simply don't need too much sleep... went to bed at 10pm.]. Well, when I came downstairs my son was still awake ...he gamed through the night. He has no sense of appropriateness... but that 8:15 call won't happen ... what will happen if he doesn't get decent grades is he will be attending the local community college and I will be buying myself a Honda Silverwing or a little Lund with a 15hp motor and trailer.

Either way I see it as a win for me. Good grades or toy(s)
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Old 08-06-2017, 05:10 AM   #12
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Just got back from visiting a top college candidate for our youngest, a leisurely 9 hours away.

My daughter's college was a solid 4 hours away .. there are a few mountain tunnels to pass and it gets quite steep in spots for the last 1/2 hour. I have to say there were a number of bad weather days we were worried for all 4 hours.

I'm so glad the sons school is an hour and forty minutes and no mountains...
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Old 08-06-2017, 06:00 AM   #13
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Our twins (youngest of the kids) leave for their first year away @ college (6 hour drive and 3 hour flight) in 11 days. Fortunately they have both been working a lot this summer and have been in charge of their schedule. At first we would be their backup alarm clock but found they have it under control and we can back off.
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Old 08-06-2017, 09:29 AM   #14
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BCG...Thanks for the morning laugh.. they are always appreciated. This morning my internal alarm clock got me up at 5. [The stiffness in the right knee makes getting comfortable and falling back asleep all but impossible. Or it could be that I like my dad I simply don't need too much sleep... went to bed at 10pm.]. Well, when I came downstairs my son was still awake ...he gamed through the night. He has no sense of appropriateness... but that 8:15 call won't happen ... what will happen if he doesn't get decent grades is he will be attending the local community college and I will be buying myself a Honda Silverwing or a little Lund with a 15hp motor and trailer.

Either way I see it as a win for me. Good grades or toy(s)
Right back at you Ray, You made me laugh with this one.
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Old 08-06-2017, 09:17 PM   #15
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My daughter's college was a solid 4 hours away .. there are a few mountain tunnels to pass and it gets quite steep in spots for the last 1/2 hour. I have to say there were a number of bad weather days we were worried for all 4 hours.

I'm so glad the sons school is an hour and forty minutes and no mountains...
yeah, I wouldn't drive it in bad weather.

fortunately, if they do attend, during the school year (not now) there are direct flights from our local regional airport.

oldest started at the local university, maybe 5 minutes down the road, but then re-applied to their first choices.

now it's an 8+ hour drive to their school, so we fly to an airport nearby, rent a vehicle, and then drive about a half-hour.
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