I somehow ended up having an unplanned discussion with a long time friend's wife via text last weekend. I very seldom communicate with her, and when I do, it is always a very light conversation.
They are struggling with some financial issues, and I was attempting to encourage her, and (this is bad) I also gave her my damn unsolicited advice.
I think I can confirm, she did not want to hear any advice from me on this topic. She totally went off on me. Wow.
I tend to not like conflict, and I value my long time friendships. All I could do is apologize, and tell her my intentions were not bad. She kind of mellowed out on her reply back.
Note: My friend has mentioned several times in the last year that his wife has been getting mad at him, so it isn't just me.
My comments and conclusions from this interaction:
- Stay out of other people's business, don't give out unrequested advice, especially if you consider them a friend that you want to keep.
- Texting doesn't show emotion or concern, so it is easy for your comments to be interpreted differently from your intentions.
- I reread my comments, and concluded that they were very mild, so I think she just took the open opportunity to chew me out. I can safely say that I think less of her now, and it will be a long time before I have any extensive communication with her on any topic. So damage was done both ways. Not good.
- I do suspect this would not have happened in person. Even if she didn't like what I said, I suspect she would have been less nasty stating her objections.
Thanks for listening to my rambling. JP
They are struggling with some financial issues, and I was attempting to encourage her, and (this is bad) I also gave her my damn unsolicited advice.
I think I can confirm, she did not want to hear any advice from me on this topic. She totally went off on me. Wow.
I tend to not like conflict, and I value my long time friendships. All I could do is apologize, and tell her my intentions were not bad. She kind of mellowed out on her reply back.
Note: My friend has mentioned several times in the last year that his wife has been getting mad at him, so it isn't just me.
My comments and conclusions from this interaction:
- Stay out of other people's business, don't give out unrequested advice, especially if you consider them a friend that you want to keep.
- Texting doesn't show emotion or concern, so it is easy for your comments to be interpreted differently from your intentions.
- I reread my comments, and concluded that they were very mild, so I think she just took the open opportunity to chew me out. I can safely say that I think less of her now, and it will be a long time before I have any extensive communication with her on any topic. So damage was done both ways. Not good.
- I do suspect this would not have happened in person. Even if she didn't like what I said, I suspect she would have been less nasty stating her objections.
Thanks for listening to my rambling. JP
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