US 'sex addict' sues over firing

[F M All]

There has to be a joke in here somewhere..................



BBC NEWS | Americas | US 'sex addict' sues over firing

 

[Charlotte]

I have had to fire 2 men so far in my career in management at Megacorp for the same reason. Both received 1 warning, then after viewing inappropriate pictures again on the internet, they were dismissed. Both begged/pleaded for mercy... well, my view is that they got mercy the first time (verbal/written warning). I can't imagine what they told their wives when they got home that day. It is more important that Megacorp enforce their rules to protect all of that offender's teammates, who do NOT want to walk into someone's cube to talk about work, and see something they do NOT want to see on someone else's computer screen. Yuck! I wasn't right for weeks after having to deal with that as the manager.

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

There has to be a joke in here somewhere..................

Probably something having to do with asking the judge to spank him as punishment when he loses.

Compulsions are pretty interesting things to deal with.

I had an employee, nice wholesome catholic guy with a nice wholesome catholic wife and six kids at home. "everyone" knew he was looking at a little porn at work, but nobody had made a complaint. Just sort of something a few of the other guys prided themselves in 'catching' him on to give him a hard time about.

About 4 years after I retired, I heard he eventually got carried away with it and got fired. After one verbal and two written warnings.

Like I said, compulsions can be pretty interesting things.

I can't imagine what they told their wives when they got home that day.

Indeed...

 

[W2R]

I can't imagine what they told their wives when they got home that day.

Obviously I never "got the hang of" being married. I've been very happily divorced for almost 10 years now. But personally, I can't imagine a wife being any more upset about her husband looking at porn and getting fired, than if he had just been looking at the ER message board on company time and got fired for that. Sheesh! Why take his web browsing tastes personally?

Being single is soooo much better for someone like me. I spend time with Frank because I like him, just as he is, and because we have fun together. Honestly, policing what he views online does not interest me.

 

[lazygood4nothinbum]

Why take his web browsing tastes personally?

i kind of agree with this and i think for a large part it is a grown up way of thinking. but i also understand people drawing lines somewhere. for instance, if i found my partner getting off on pictures of bestiality, i would get completely grossed out and i can not imagine myself touching that guy ever again.

there was a joke about that on 2 & a half men the other night. something about a pet dog and peanut butter. not only did i think it too gross for tv but it brought back a memory of one of my childhood friends suggesting the same thing in the presence of my weimar. i was completely grossed out even then and i would draw that line today on someone else's personal browsing tastes.

 

[Brat]

My mother was a business owner with a good size workforce. Once she and I were talking about people who gossiped about others sexuality. Her comment was "They aren't busy enough." Her approach was to increase the workload of employees who engaged in idle talk. It didn't take long for the message to be delivered.

 

[W2R]

i kind of agree with this and i think for a large part it is a grown up way of thinking. but i also understand people drawing lines somewhere. for instance, if i found my partner getting off on pictures of bestiality, i would get completely grossed out and i can not imagine myself touching that guy ever again.

True. I would have a problem with someone who overly enjoyed watching the Iraqi beheading videos over, and over, and over, and over, because that would tell me something shocking about him that I didn't already know (or I wouldn't be with him).

I would probably assume that a heterosexual married guy would enjoy viewing heterosexual porn, though, so that wouldn't tell me anything about him that I didn't already know. Maybe I am overly simplistic in that assumption.

 

[lazygood4nothinbum]

um, i'm not sure but i think their preference is lesbian porn. talk about completely lost on me.

 

[W2R]

um, i'm not sure but i think their preference is lesbian porn. talk about completely lost on me.

LOL!! I can imagine. See? I knew I was being too simplistic. Oh well!! I guess my argument broke down.

But really, would you get upset if your partner was looking at gay male porn? I wouldn't think that would be all that upsetting for you, though I don't know you so maybe it would be. I think that's probably analogous.

 

[AltaRed]

What people do on their own time for their interest or curiousity is completely up to them. I don't pass judgement on individual tastes. But there is a protocol to be adhered to in a work environment where no person should feel embarassed or threatened by those around him or her. That is the reason for comprehensive harassment policies at work.

Our IT folks would do network scans on a regular basis for images and then zero in on suspect ones. I had to provide warning notice to 3 employees in the late '90s for having porn images on their office, i.e. company, PCs. They quickly complied.

 

[Brat]

Absolutely!!!

Managers, supervisors, NEVER describe the behavior as a mental condition least the perp want 'accommodation for disability'.

 

[Moemg]

Obviously I never "got the hang of" being married. I've been very happily divorced for almost 10 years now. But personally, I can't imagine a wife being any more upset about her husband looking at porn and getting fired, than if he had just been looking at the ER message board on company time and got fired for that. Sheesh! Why take his web browsing tastes personally?

Being single is soooo much better for someone like me. I spend time with Frank because I like him, just as he is, and because we have fun together. Honestly, policing what he views online does not interest me.

So it would be okay if he had his profile on single sites

 

[W2R]

So it would be okay if he had his profile on single sites

To me, searching for and contacting someone by using a singles site is a lot different from looking at porn. See? I knew I was unsuited to marriage.

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

um, i'm not sure but i think their preference is lesbian porn. talk about completely lost on me.

Absolutely. I can confirm this suspicion on behalf of 97.4% of the heterosexual male population.

 

[FinallyRetired]

Our IT folks would do network scans on a regular basis for images and then zero in on suspect ones. I had to provide warning notice to 3 employees in the late '90s for having porn images on their office, i.e. company, PCs. They quickly complied.

That's a good way to handle it. I sympathize with both sides on this. Obviously a company can't have its employees looking at porn all day on the internet. On the other hand, there are people for whom porn is really an addiction as much as alcoholism. Having an open internet computer on their desk is the equivalent of having an open alcohol cabinet in their office. This doesn't justify the porn browsing at work, but I wonder why companies can't lock the liquor cabinet? I mean, isn't there software that could lock out offensive sites at work? And not just offensive sites, there might be others who browse for recipes all day, or some other non-work sites.

 

[AltaRed]

This doesn't justify the porn browsing at work, but I wonder why companies can't lock the liquor cabinet? I mean, isn't there software that could lock out offensive sites at work? And not just offensive sites, there might be others who browse for recipes all day, or some other non-work sites.

Yes, and many companies, including the one I retired from, do that to a large extent, but it was limited to known offensive sites (porn, hate, etc.). But it is a fine line between being overly prescriptive and blocking for good reasons. Ultimately too many sites come and go to keep up with it. So for the unknown or grey areas, there was a popup that asked whether the user really wants to visit that site and it was up to the user to decide.

 

[SamHouston]

The company that I retired from had a pop up that basically just said that the company had banned access to the particular site you were trying to access. But it seems to have been based on "key words" and the like rather than on specific site addresses.

I remember trying to find some information on breast cancer because of a question my wife had called me about and the sites were all blocked...I assume the fact that the word "breast" was found in the description of the sites caused them to be blocked. But it did make the HR and IT people happy, so what can you say?

 

[bssc]

At our megacorp, certain specific sites are banned. I have a list of sites at work that I visit, such as here, which I know are not banned. I very rarely go past the list so I don't run into much. However, sometimes I see links show up as banned. The only other site was the Church of the Sub Genius. Maybe I should sue for religious discrimination.

 

[F M All]

Church of the Sub Genius.

That must be where Nords goes.

 

[VoyT]

But personally, I can't imagine a wife being any more upset about her husband looking at porn and getting fired, than if he had just been looking at the ER message board on company time and got fired for that. Sheesh! Why take his web browsing tastes personally?

Depends ... I wouldn't take it well at all if I found my spouse was perusing something involving children....

 

[BunsGettingFirm]

I know it's wrong to steal company's time, but given the complexity of the problems that knowledge workers have to solve, sometimes furiously typing away at a keyboard doesn't help much, and, besides, very few people can concentrate fully for 10-11 hours at a stretch. I find that a little distance from the problem helps a great deal after I have spent enough time banging my head against the problem, so reading a forum or sending some personal emails definitely provide that needed distance. I certainly wouldn't surf for pr0n at work though. (I have it on a memory stick.)

However, even for non-pr0n personal PC use, I would still bring my laptop and my own Verizon card. You might as well write your email at work on a big placard and carry it through the company's halls. It's that secure. The same goes for your web postings. Don't you think that your boss would weigh your desire to FIRE if the choice for promotion comes down to you and someone equally qualified but is not on the FIRE track?

 

[NinjaPigeon]

While many companies can and do monitor your traffic, they don't generally monitor it actively. As in, they collect the data for when they get a complaint, so they can cover their asses. It's a waste of resources to have someone sitting in an office watching what other people click on.

But yes, I feel that my line of work requires that I sometimes distance myself from my work. I've never seen the point of "looking busy" when I very clearly am trying to let my subconscious work on a problem.