Acquaintances and Friends Dying Too Young

[Nick12]

Don't live in time, live in the moment, tomorrow is not guaranteed.

 

[Dtail]

This is sort of a sensitive topic to me, which is why I couldn't bear to post until now.

Yes, people are dying too young. In less than 2 years I lost:

1) My ex-husband of 23 years, at age 67. (June, 2018)
2) My cousin who grew up with me like a sister and was my best friend, at age 68. (Sept, 2018)
3) My beloved older brother Bob, at age 77. (Feb, 2020)

I did not have enough time to get through the grief for each of them, before the next one died. And as if these weren't enough of a sucker punch in the gut, every time I Google the name of some old friend or other, lately there's more than a 50% chance of finding out they are dead.

Every day there is some famous person who has died. Not only that, due to my total ignorance I just found out that Roy Orbison died 33 years ago. Like an idiot I thought he was still alive and enjoying his old age.

I'm 73 and I am determined that I am not going to go until I am at least 90!!! Somebody's got to fill in the high end of the curve. Might as well be me.

Hey why stop at 90? We are counting on you to reach your goal of world's oldest woman.

 

[street]

I have in the last few weeks a couple of people I knew well, that have had stroke and a heart attacks. All under 70 years old. Even thou still alive these are life changing events for life in the future.

So, sorry to hear of the loved ones people have lost. In reality, what we see happening, we should learn something from it.

I know so many that are very well off in life and way past their retirement years still fighting the war at their job. Money is very important to some that continue to work. I'm happy they are doing what makes them happy but in a way I feel bad for them also.

 

[W2R]

Hey why stop at 90? We are counting on you to reach your goal of world's oldest woman.

Sounds good to me! I did my financial planning to age 117, and the oldest living person in the world is now 118. I know, such risk, I should have planned to age 118.

 

[Dtail]

Sounds good to me! I did my financial planning to age 117, and the oldest living person in the world is now 118. I know, such risk, I should have planned to age 118.

Plus don't forget Frank needs to also claim the male title.

 

[W2R]

Plus don't forget Frank needs to also claim the male title.

Absolutely! He's 6 years younger than me. So, if he becomes the world's oldest male (now, age 112) I would still be alive if I lived to 118.

 

[unclemick]

Absolutely! He's 6 years younger than me. So, if he becomes the world's oldest male (now, age 112) I would still be alive if I lived to 118.

Heh heh heh - Go for it!

 

[Koolau]

Absolutely! He's 6 years younger than me. So, if he becomes the world's oldest male (now, age 112) I would still be alive if I lived to 118.

I have a friend 105 now. Still sharp but quite slowed down physically since about her 100th BD. YMMV

 

[DrRoy]

About 2 years ago a friend from high school died. We shared the exact same BD. That felt unsettling.

 

[tulak]

There’s not much longevity in my family, which is a bummer. Only a few have made it past 70, but I’m optimistic that I can break that trend.

I’m planning a road trip this summer and looked up distant family that I’d like to visit. I haven’t been in touch with any of them for decades. Unfortunately, while searching for them on the internet, I found out that my dad’s cousin passed away in 2018 in his early 70s. However, my great uncle (his dad) is still alive at 101. According to my distant cousin, he still lives by himself and is mentally sharp. So there is hope!

And I can’t wait to see him. I thought I missed my chance. He’s the only one left from that generation and I’m hoping for some interesting family stories.

 

[jollystomper]

This is sort of a sensitive topic to me, which is why I couldn't bear to post until now.

Yes, people are dying too young. In less than 2 years I lost:

1) My ex-husband of 23 years, at age 67. (June, 2018)
2) My cousin who grew up with me like a sister and was my best friend, at age 68. (Sept, 2018)
3) My beloved older brother Bob, at age 77. (Feb, 2020)

I did not have enough time to get through the grief for each of them, before the next one died. And as if these weren't enough of a sucker punch in the gut, every time I Google the name of some old friend or other, lately there's more than a 50% chance of finding out they are dead.

Every day there is some famous person who has died. Not only that, due to my total ignorance I just found out that Roy Orbison died 33 years ago. Like an idiot I thought he was still alive and enjoying his old age.

I'm 73 and I am determined that I am not going to go until I am at least 90!!! Somebody's got to fill in the high end of the curve. Might as well be me.

That is tough. My DW has had a similar string of deaths of people she was close to, all between April 2020 and April 2021:
- College roommate, one of her best friends since our freshman year (62)
- Brother, sibling she was closest to (55)
- Cousin, who lived with her family for several years when they were kids and was like a brother to her (65)
- Uncle, the last surviving aunt/uncle on her fathers side, a retired college professor who taught at the same college we attended (80, but looked 20 years younger and was very active until a stroke 4 years ago).

They all shared her characteristic of being talkative. In course of a week she would talk with each of them at least once, a had spoken to each within a week or so of their death. The quietness now is very difficult for her to handle.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

Just got word that a fellow Air Force retiree I flew with has passed away after having surgery (something related to an infection). He was only 46.

And another former flying colleague that is battling stage 4 cancer and it isn't looking good for him. Tough day today, for sure.

 

[JDARNELL]

Just got word that a fellow Air Force retiree I flew with has passed away after having surgery (something related to an infection). He was only 46.

And another former flying colleague that is battling stage 4 cancer and it isn't looking good for him. Tough day today, for sure.

That’s rough. I went through a phase where 4 battle buddies died at age 50 when I was 50. All non combat related. What freaked me out was I had a boss (0-6) F-15C guy that was early 50s 3 yr BZ that died in his sleep. Was a stud but stopped breathing 100 times an hr and didn’t wear his CPAP. I went and had a sleep study and I was 24 per hr. So after 4 yrs using it I don’t leave home without it.

 

[street]

With in the last month I seen where two more under 68 have passed away. Another one I didn't he was 62 died in a single car roller and he was married to a good friend of mine in high school.

Always sad to see who is the next one I know.

 

[RAE]

Found out today that a former coworker has pancreatic and liver cancer. Chemotherapy hasn't worked, and he said they are telling him he has maybe 6 months left. He is 68 years old, never smoked, doesn't drink, normal weight. I'm 66, and this is about the fourth coworker around my age that has died or become very ill in the last couple years or so. Don't wait too long to retire, folks, you never know how long you will have on this earth.

 

[aja8888]

Found out today that a former coworker has pancreatic and liver cancer. Chemotherapy hasn't worked, and he said they are telling him he has maybe 6 months left. He is 68 years old, never smoked, doesn't drink, normal weight. I'm 66, and this is about the fourth coworker around my age that has died or become very ill in the last couple years or so. Don't wait too long to retire, folks, you never know how long you will have on this earth.

I'm going on 78 and can make a scary big list of friends, family members, classmates, and neighbors who are gone.

I'm lucky, I had my annual physical last week and all blood work is normal and no "known" other issues. Although I know that tomorrow morning I could wake up with a third eye starting to grow on my forehead.

 

[tmm99]

I don't know why I keep on coming back here to read new posts. This thread depresses me for like a week! It's a good reminder though that we aren't going to live forever.

 

[RetireeRobert]

One former co-worker died at age 60. He had a brief foreknowledge of his fate (cancer) and had to rush in his retirement papers so his spouse could get survivor benefits from his retirement. Another coworker died at age 66 after a mere one year of retirement. A good friend coworker died at age 63 after seven years of retirement. I have made it to age 75 and retired 21 years ago. I never regretted my early retirement decision, and now looking back at others I knew, I am more and more glad I did retire early and get those 21 years with more to come. I feel blessed.

 

[Markola]

Was a stud but stopped breathing 100 times an hr and didn’t wear his CPAP. I went and had a sleep study and I was 24 per hr. So after 4 yrs using it I don’t leave home without it.

Smart move. Me neither.

 

[skyking1]

Rather than create a thread I'll post it here.
On 5-3 my wife's brother passed from prostate cancer. She had a voicemail from his phone, he did not want anyone to know or go out of their way to see him.
A year ago on 5-3 my niece from colon cancer. Before she passed, ex-brother in law went down with covid and died in 12 hours, right in the middle of our vigil for niece. His estranged girls had to go pull the plug for him.
Thursday, it was niece's dad. He refused treatment at the hospital and we brought him to another sister's place to die in the comfort of a home, surrounded by family.
My sister, his wife, lost a leg a few days after her daughter passed last year, and she fell and broke her good hip two weeks ago.
We brought her from the rehab place on Tuesday to say her last goodbyes to her husband of 54 years. There is the most touching and heartbreaking video of it on my phone and it tears me up just thinking about it.
My wife's second mom passed two weeks ago.
We are ready to take a break from all this!

 

[street]

skyking1, very sorry to hear that. Life doesn't always seem fair. I wish you the very best!

 

[Eagle43]

Back

I'll be 78 in a few months.

Heh heh heh - Hope I'm not spiking the ball before the goal line. As a child I remember Grandmom always reading the local obit to see who she out lived.

I just made 78. Your post surprised me because I thought you were oldern me.
Anyway, glad to know you're still in the game.
.

 

[street]

Just talked to a good friend and he was telling me, he has prostate cancer and will be starting chemo next week. He also told me of a guy I know well, that has cancer and it has spread all over, and is at home just home, with nothing more they can do for him.

Also, he told me of a guy I have known for many years and I just about hired him at one time. He has prostate cancer and is doctoring with it and said he will have his removed.

Two of the guys are under 60 years old and one is 67 years of age.

So, sad for these people every time I hear of one more that I have known is sick or has died. It makes me wonder why I didn't retire earlier.

 

[ychuck46]

Let go of that thought

Many of us think the same way but we can't/shouldn't beat ourselves up for it ("why didn't I retire earlier"). Life is filled with pleasant and less than pleasant occurrences. Just continue to enjoy the retirement time you do have; you earned it.

 

[W2R]

Many of us think the same way but we can't/shouldn't beat ourselves up for it ("why didn't I retire earlier"). Life is filled with pleasant and less than pleasant occurrences. Just continue to enjoy the retirement time you do have; you earned it.

+1 Couldn't have said it better.