Poll:Do you intermingle your finances? How?

[omni550]

Another recent post got me wondering how the folks here handle their personal finances.

Please vote in the poll. Feel free to explain further in a post.

omni

 

[ERD50]

You forgot "What's mine is ours, what's hers is hers".

-ERD50

 

[youbet]

You forgot "What's mine is ours, what's hers is hers".

-ERD50

+1

Our IRAs are separate (legal requirement, right?) but everything else has both of our names on it but belongs absolutely, 100%, no question about it, without a doubt, to HER. Just ask HER.......

 

[Alan]

Our IRAs and I-Bonds are separate as per legal requirement but everything else has both of our names on it. Also, my pensions are paid into a joint bank account.

 

[73ss454]

You forgot "What's mine is ours, what's hers is hers".

-ERD50

This sums it up.

 

[Animorph]

In general we share income 50/50. Bonuses go only to the individual, stock options go towards retirement. We hold accounts for retirement and shared expenses as well as accounts for ourselves and the kids. Retirement and shared expenses are paid first, DW and I split the rest, and the kids get/used to get a split of that as well. We have an adjustment for car mileage since we ended up driving much different distances to work. Most of our living expenses are shared, though car expenses are paid only as a fixed rate per mile. After that, it's spend what you've got in your individual account. I tend to go for the expensive cars and audio gear, so DW's balance is higher than mine.

We've done this since we got married, 30 years ago now. We consult for all out of the ordinary common purchases, but buy stuff using our own money at will. I've even borrowed from DW in the distant past to buy a new car and made monthly payments with interest.

All the retirement money is considered common, regardless of whose name it is in. We've continued to add to our individual accounts while DW is still w*rking (I told her to quit years ago, but she still enjoys it). After that it'll pretty much be 4% rule with the individual accounts for individual spending. Though we can go for years without spending anything like that much. Since they are not in the main retirement plan, they also act as a margin of safety and long-term care self insurance.

 

[kz]

Our money would be considered "joint" for the most part but when it comes to spending it, well hubby is the winner in that dept.

 

[Keim]

All in one big pot for us. Do maintain separate his/her "mad" money accounts, amounting to a few thousand dollars.

 

[Midpack]

We got married 32 years ago, did anyone have separate accounts back then when dinosaurs walked the earth?

 

[MBAustin]

We do have accounts in our names separately (IRAs, etc.) but we manage it as one pot. Always have.

 

[haha]

I suppose it is clear to everyone that except in cases of separate property that has very carefully always been kept separate (and often not even then), if push ever comes to shove it will be up to the courts to decide who gets what and the fiction of separate accounts will quickly dissolve-even as to retirement accounts. They may be separate by law, but they are not separate like "I can take mine and go away".

Ha

 

[FIREd]

Practically, we consider that everything is ours.

Technically though:
Retirement accounts: separate
I-bonds: separate
Taxable investment accounts, house, cars, US bank accounts: jointly owned
European bank accounts and real estate: in my name only

 

[2017ish]

Same as most of others; all finances "ours" since prior to finishing our grad schools many years ago. Retirement accounts nominally in each name; consequently, we also have a "normal" vanguard account in the name of the former SAHD (me) to position us for full use of estate/inheritance tax exclusions in the event of an errant truck.

 

[pb4uski]

We do have accounts in our names separately (IRAs, etc.) but we manage it as one pot. Always have.

+1 for 30 years.

 

[Indigo Mule]

We have a joint account and we each have a separate account. We pay a set amount into the joint account for household expenses (covering things from the mortgage to takeout food and groceries). We do as we will with what is in our separate accounts.

I wanted it that way because my first marriage (as a very young adult) ended with me holding the bag financially for a huge load of debt I hadn't run up. So opening a joint account was a big step of trust for me.

When my husband (current husband) and I first moved in together, I was the one who managed the household budget and paid the bills. A few years into the relationship, after I was promoted and started regularly working 50+ hours per week, he agreed to take that on. I recently learned (meaning I finally asked for details) that my husband stopped keeping his money separate, and that for years what we have REALLY had is a joint account, with me having a separate account on the side. Heh.

I don't see ever doing away with my separate account. While I have pretty much worked through my issues from the first marriage, and trust my husband (yes, we even have a joint credit card or two, though we do not use them except for some recurring charges), it is important to me to have a budget that includes money that is solely under my control. The amount I contribute to our joint account varies from year to year, depending on what mutual or individual spending/savings goals we have.

 

[Nords]

Spouse and I still have separate checking accounts, dating from the 1980s when we were stationed a couple thousand miles apart. Since then we've been reluctant to mess with the military's pay system, and we plan to continue this until we're dead (or NFCU goes out of business).

We also have separate credit cards. I know she has at least one and I have three. Not too hard to track.

Everything else is joint, or POD/TOD.

 

[Lisa99]

We have a joint account where both of our salaries are deposited, but we each have separate accounts where our monthly 'allowances' are deposited via transfer from the joint account. The allowance can be spent on whatever we choose without consulting the other.

 

[Old Microbiologist]

We also commingled our funds as our income is derived entirely on my military pension and later on my social security (she never worked 40 quarters so gets 1/2 of mine). Like IndigoMule I was burnt badly on my second divorce as was my wife on her second divorce as well (third marriage for both of us). However, we are both givers so this is not an issue and really we are secure enough in our relationship to be worry free on that score. She is an excellent financial manager and pays all the bills, manages the money transfers, taxes, et.al. Our respective properties are covered by prenups but once we sell them (we both had 2 houses coming into the marriage) the proceeds get commingled into our brokerage accounts. The 401k's are legally separate but I have her designated as the manager as it is handled much like a brokerage account with her doing 3 day trade cycles on the market (although 1 day is possible if you only use 50% of the money). As a successful Day Trader she manages roughly 100% profit a year so I am not complaining. We do not ever exceed my pension for expenses and we won't get SS for another 3 years so beats me what we will do with all the money. But it is her joy to do Day Trading and as we don't need the money it is a risk free hobby for her. She maintains it is for emergency use only. As we have no debt whatsoever, no property taxes, and relatively low expenses it is truly wonderful to be free and have no financial concerns at all. I actually hate dealing with money matters and she likes it so it is an excellent partnership in that regard.

 

[MichaelB]

We shared our finances since day 1, back when we had nothing to share and barely enough for even one account. The only seperate bank accounts either of us had were payroll accounts or HSA.

 

[Gumby]

We shared our finances since day 1, back when we had nothing to share and barely enough for even one account.

Same here.

 

[Sarah in SC]

We shared our finances since day 1, back when we had nothing to share and barely enough for even one account. The only seperate bank accounts either of us had were payroll accounts or HSA.

From the very start, and the first nickel, too.

 

[Trawler]

We maintain a joint checking account for household expenses and seperate individual checking , savings , investment, 401k, IRA and Roth accounts however we jointly manage all but our individual checking accounts. This is due to it was most of the accounts we set up prior to us being a couple. When we married added tranfer on death to all acconts to each other. My job produces 65% of HH income so I contribute 65% of monthly household expenses and 65% of retirement savings. We both agree on what we should each save toward our retiement goals. So what ever is left after HH monthly expense contribution and retirement savings contribution stays in individual checking and then each can spend however they see fit. We see the whole pot of gold as a joint asset.

 

[farmerEd]

It has never even occurred to me to do anything other than throw it all into one big pot...that is what marriage is supposed to be, right? Anything less always seemed to me to be planning for an eventual 'exit from the partnership'.

 

[travelover]

It has never even occurred to me to do anything other than throw it all into one big pot...that is what marriage is supposed to be, right? Anything less always seemed to me to be planning for an eventual 'exit from the partnership'.

It is quite different when one remarries at a later age and there are children from previous marriages in the mix.

 

[farmerEd]

It is quite different when one remarries at a later age and there are children from previous marriages in the mix.

Definitely, children do tend to complicate things, especially when each brings their own and maybe even throw in some shared ones....that can indeed make things more difficult...I wouldn't have any idea how to handle that fairly...guess I should change my answer to "In my situation, first marrige at a youngish age I never consider anything but....."