I think my sister has no idea how hard this is going to be because she usually visits my Mom for a day here and there . I go for several weeks at a time . I do think my Mom will evntually need to do this but not right now . Besides the fact that this will drive me nuts I think it will put Mom over the edge when she is taken away from her enviroment. Any suggestions so I don't end up having shock therapy ?
Tell your sister from me that this is a really, really, really bad idea. Tell her I also said that it sounds like you need a new sister.
Your mother is in a familiar, supportive environment with friends and caregivers. Why would anyone possibly want to mess with that?!? There is no way that moving to Florida will possibly improve on this situation. Your mother is unlikely to benefit from the disruption and overstimulation of a move, let alone acclimating to a new climate & environment.
My spouse's parents spent six years with us in Hawaii (from Annapolis) and it was the worst experience of
everyone's lives. It was their idea to move here, and their idea to move back, but we would've happily paid for their return to the Mainland.
If your mother joins you guys in Florida then the situation will eventually get ugly, mean, and nasty. So tell your sister that you're sparing everyone the pain of the transition by getting ugly, mean, and nasty now-- tell her that you can't support her plans and that there's no way you'll share accomodations with your grandmother for more than the annual two-week "vacation" at your place. Tell her not to sell Mom's old place until it's been vacant for at least a year, tell her that you will in no way contribute financially, physically, or emotionally to this plan, and then tell your sister that the only contribution you plan to make is the expense of moving your mother back to her original home. And then you should re-key your home's locks.
I think it's OK to tell your sister that she's being selfish and is not behaving in your mother's best interests.
Gosh, I think your post struck one of my unhealed nerves... with a bullwhip!