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Old 01-14-2020, 05:10 PM   #81
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Old 01-16-2020, 09:50 AM   #82
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Originally Posted by OldShooter View Post
This article re-raises a point that I tried to make earlier in the thread: Using testamentary trusts is not just about marriages and divorces. Several here have commented on how wise, trustworthy, beautiful, etc. their children are. This can all be true, but their assets are still in peril due to circumstances completely beyond their control like a judgment due to an auto accident.

Well, maybe it would be a good idea to talk about it. Hopefully your estate plan contemplates that he may predecease you. That is more or less the same problem. Have you designated charities as beneficiaries then? Maybe you and he ought to talk about what charities you believe in.

Switching gears, I submit the the "controlling from the grave" meme is distorting the dialog here. Certainly it is possible to draft a trust that does exactly that, but there are many situations where a better meme might be "protecting from the grave."

The simplest case might be a special needs trust for a person who cannot live on their own. A direct bequest might result in his/her not qualifying for government aid that they might otherwise get, where a properly written trust can provide money that is supplemental. Depending on the person's mental ability, a direct bequest might also result in a court-appointed conservator being given control of the money.

In our case, "protecting from the grave" means that our son will not receive a seven figure bequest that he has no idea how to manage. He would not be a spendthrift; we don't worry about that, but he is a very open and trusting soul who would be very susceptible to salespeople that he should not trust.

In the case of our grandchildren, "protecting from the grave" means encouraging them via financial carrots to go for as much education as they can while, at the same time, protecting them from the sort of natural spendthrift urges that come from being young.
Like your analysis. I'm in the same situation. Wife/I older, 70's. Young daughters. 20's. Nice but naive. Have substantial net worth. Seems the way to go is, Trust. Younger relative to manage Trust, with guidelines, and pre-nup agreement.
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Old 01-16-2020, 10:06 AM   #83
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Originally Posted by wolf View Post
... Younger relative to manage Trust, with guidelines, and pre-nup agreement.
Be careful with this. Having someone in the family controlling money for someone else in the family has a high probability of destroying relationships.

Better maybe to have the relative be co-trustee with an (also younger) attorney. It can be the attorney who says "Sorry, DD, the trust money is not available for buying a Ferrari and, no, we will not start investing in bitcoin." My DW, whose troops administered many trusts at the megabank, ran into this kind of thing all the time and often pi$$ed off beneficiaries who had wild spending ideas. Some even went to court trying to break the trust. DW never lost a case but the trusts, of course, had to pay the legal costs of the attack.
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Old 01-16-2020, 05:09 PM   #84
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Originally Posted by 4legsgood View Post
I think my daughter would be grateful if I could figure out some way to safeguard her inheritance in case of a bad divorce, and not think of it as controlling from the grave.
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