Should I relocate for more money or stay and pay off my house?

[pb4uski]

Take the new job, sell the house, take a leap of faith.

 

[aaronc879]

Take the new job, sell the house, take a leap of faith.

OR... Don't fix what's not broken. Don't take unnecessary risks.

I don't think we are making the OPs decision any easier.

 

[RobbieB]

That'll teach 'em to ask questions about working in a retirement forum -

 

[Barry Darsow]

OR... Don't fix what's not broken. Don't take unnecessary risks.

I don't think we are making the OPs decision any easier.

Lol not really but there are good cases to be made in either direction and I do appreciate everyone's words of wisdom. I have been pondering this for over a week now, made lists of pros and cons, crunched the numbers, and keep going back and forth. I might just end up flipping a coin

I have a friend who left a stable job to take a (local) job making more money....he ended up being laid off 6 months later and it took him awhile to get back on his feet. That is the kind of thing that has me hesitant to make such a move.

 

[daylatedollarshort]

If you have not already, you might also want to ask your question on Reddit in subreddits like frugal or financial independence. There are more people your age and a fair number seem to work in IT on those forums.

One interesting thing I've noticed is that some of the FI poster's dreams are to save up money, move to a low cost of living place, have a mortgage free home and then not work or downshift to a low stress job. So you are actually now already living other some other people's dream life. But it might be harder to appreciate without first having experienced a high paying yet soul crushing megacorp career and expensive urban housing lifestyle.

 

[Barry Darsow]

That'll teach 'em to ask questions about working in a retirement forum -

Lol... Might be a strange question for this forum but it does relate to finances. If I ask anyone close to me their opinion, I cannot get an unbiased answer because naturally they look at how it affects them.

 

[Barry Darsow]

If you have not already, you might also want to ask your question on Reddit in subreddits like frugal or financial independence. There are more people your age and a fair number seem to work in IT on those forums.

Good idea, thanks.

One interesting thing I've noticed is that some of the FI poster's dreams are to save up money, move to a low cost of living place, have a mortgage free home and then not work or downshift to a low stress job. So you are actually now already living other some other people's dream life. But it might be harder to appreciate without first having experienced a high paying yet soul crushing megacorp career and expensive urban housing lifestyle.

Good observation. It is stressful at times but it could be worse. I don't envy the people higher up on the ladder where I work. Perhaps I should be looking for a lower stress/lower paying job instead lol. Most of my hobbies and interests are low cost and I do value time more than money. I would love to have a shorter commute which is nearly impossible in this field. As they say, the grass is greener on the other side.

 

[RobbieB]

You should do what you want to do because you really feel it's right.

Don't get caught up in the "salary survey" stuff, just consider weather or not you like your job and the company and where you are right now.

If you are happy, that's the most important thing. If you are not happy then it's time to move.

 

[Meadbh]

You should do what you want to do because you really feel it's right.

Don't get caught up in the "salary survey" stuff, just consider weather or not you like your job and the company and where you are right now.

If you are happy, that's the most important thing. If you are not happy then it's time to move.

+1
There are risks and benefits either way. Fundamentally, this decision is about what you value at this point in your life: unambitious continuity versus urban excitement and opportunity.

When I was your age I followed my dreams internationally, but I didn't own a home until my mid 30's, when I had fulfilled some of my career goals and wanted to settle down for a while. I am so glad I didn't become a homeowner earlier: it would have cramped my career mobility. Twenty years later, approaching FI, my priorities had changed.

Only you can decide. And not deciding is a decision too.

 

[MooreBonds]

I don't recall if you addressed this aspect already...but what is the possibility of taking the new job, and then moving on up either in this new company, or finding another new job (in a few years) with someone else in the new city, with an even higher salary? Also, don't forget to analyze what you enjoy about various jobs, and possibly making a related career move into a new position (but still somewhat related), but which builds on your knowledge, experience, and abilities?

 

[brucethebroker]

1. Which job will allow you to grow your self employed side gig the fastest?
2. Do you want to keep your current home long term?

Becoming a landlord is not difficult-lot's of good info on internet. It would allow you to have a fall back plan should the new job not work out.

I rented to an in law for about 5 years and it was a good experience, but I also know of many "not so good" stories out there. Parents should be a good bet.

Owning rental properties can be a nice part of your retirement income stream. With the right renters, the problems can be managed easily. Nice tax benefits, also.

We foolishly sold 2 of our first homes, and made very little (Realtor fees, etc.)-we have regretted that over the years. Today, (30 years later) it would have added about $3k a month to our cash flow. And, yes, we would have had a few problems along the way.

Sounds like you are getting lots of good advice. Good luck.

 

[dixonge]

If you take the new job, move to the new town and rent out your old house (or sell it) then you should be able to reduce your commute significantly. You keep mentioning going back to your existing home frequently, but why? You already said most of your friends have moved away. Do you have a significant other? Do you really need to see your parents that often? I used to live in a different country, and now that I live about three hours away from them, I'm not sure I see my parents that much more often. Even when I lived about one county away I only saw them once every 2-3 months. We can communicate frequently via text, phone, Facebook. No need to see in person every single weekend!

If it were me in your shoes I'd take the job, sell the house, save up a lot more money for retirement. That's still the goal, right? ER?

 

[convergent]

I have worked in the IT industry for over 30 years. If you are good at what you do, you are very under paid where you are. If I were in your shoes, assuming the job offer is as good as you said it is, I would take it and move. I'd also sell the house you are currently living in.

Your greatest asset is you. While it might be tempting to hang on to the house and rent it out; it can be a lot of headaches, especially if you are so far away. You don't want to be distracted by that at this point. Ask yourself this... if you lived in the other city where your new job is and didn't have a house in the city you currently live in, would you buy one there as a rental property (while living in the new city)? My guess is that is a big fat "No!". It would also allow you to avoid the situation with the family member that wants to rent it from you... never want to get into family things like that because a) they probably want a bargain price; and 2) what are you going to do if they are being a bad tenant or aren't paying you as they should?

Now is the time in your life to maximize your earning potential, and that will just continue to grow if you are in an area with competition for jobs.

 

[Barry Darsow]

You should do what you want to do because you really feel it's right.

Don't get caught up in the "salary survey" stuff, just consider weather or not you like your job and the company and where you are right now.

If you are happy, that's the most important thing. If you are not happy then it's time to move.

I like some things about my job (40 hour work week and autonomy, for example) but not other things (incompetent managent, commute, on call duty). The house is the main thing keeping me there as well as the family situation - some family members would be upset if I were to move. The question I am asking myself is do I like my house enough to stay at the current job or give up the house to take a job that could be better but could be worse .

 

[Barry Darsow]

+1
There are risks and benefits either way. Fundamentally, this decision is about what you value at this point in your life: unambitious continuity versus urban excitement and opportunity.

When I was your age I followed my dreams internationally, but I didn't own a home until my mid 30's, when I had fulfilled some of my career goals and wanted to settle down for a while. I am so glad I didn't become a homeowner earlier: it would have cramped my career mobility. Twenty years later, approaching FI, my priorities had changed.

Only you can decide. And not deciding is a decision too.

Sometimes I wish I would have waited to buy a house and just did the moving around thing in my 20s whwn I had nothing ro lose. Everyone was telling me I would be throwing my money away by renting. The upside is thatbI pay a lot less per month than I would be if I were renting as I would be paying twice as much to rent an equivalent house. The downside is the below market salary

 

[Barry Darsow]

I don't recall if you addressed this aspect already...but what is the possibility of taking the new job, and then moving on up either in this new company, or finding another new job (in a few years) with someone else in the new city, with an even higher salary? Also, don't forget to analyze what you enjoy about various jobs, and possibly making a related career move into a new position (but still somewhat related), but which builds on your knowledge, experience, and abilities?

I don't think there is much moving up there as the two managers have been there about 20 years. There is an opportunity to learn as they want to start focusing on agile and the like which I haven't been exposed to. It might only be a 2-3 year job. The job is to help them enhance their current systems and build a some new systems but what happens if the demand goes down as they already have a few programmers on their staff. This increased demand could be temporary and then they could find themselves with more programmera than they need. That is one of my main concerns as it is not a contract position and I work in an at will state where the employer and employee can terminate employment at any time.

 

[Barry Darsow]

1. Which job will allow you to grow your self employed side gig the fastest?
2. Do you want to keep your current home long term?

Becoming a landlord is not difficult-lot's of good info on internet. It would allow you to have a fall back plan should the new job not work out.

I rented to an in law for about 5 years and it was a good experience, but I also know of many "not so good" stories out there. Parents should be a good bet.

Owning rental properties can be a nice part of your retirement income stream. With the right renters, the problems can be managed easily. Nice tax benefits, also.

We foolishly sold 2 of our first homes, and made very little (Realtor fees, etc.)-we have regretted that over the years. Today, (30 years later) it would have added about $3k a month to our cash flow. And, yes, we would have had a few problems along the way.

Sounds like you are getting lots of good advice. Good luck.

1) Probably the current job.

2) Yes

My dad would want to rent it but he often complains that he is not retired yet. He might get tired of working, fall on "hard times", and then have trouble paying the rent....thinking I am making enough money to absorb the cost. Not a likely scenario but possible. Or I could sell it to him on contract. He has another mortgage so would likely not be able to get a bank loan. Or maybe I just pay it off and rent it to him for cheap since I know he would take care of it as opposed to someone off the street.

 

[Barry Darsow]

If you take the new job, move to the new town and rent out your old house (or sell it) then you should be able to reduce your commute significantly. You keep mentioning going back to your existing home frequently, but why? You already said most of your friends have moved away. Do you have a significant other?

No

Do you really need to see your parents that often? I used to live in a different country, and now that I live about three hours away from them, I'm not sure I see my parents that much more often. Even when I lived about one county away I only saw them once every 2-3 months. We can communicate frequently via text, phone, Facebook. No need to see in person every single weekend!

My parents are divorced. I don't see my mother too often as she has her own stuff going on. My dad currently has a live in girlfriend but she lives out of state and goes back and forth. When she is not around, he calls and wants to see me more often. My grandmother would really be upset if I were to move but I don't think I would see her any less than I do now, every month or two. She wants everybody near by and got really upset when my cousin almost moved 3 hours away....even though she has plenty if other family in the area.

If it were me in your shoes I'd take the job, sell the house, save up a lot more money for retirement. That's still the goal, right? ER?

Yes

 

[Meadbh]

Sometimes I wish I would have waited to buy a house and just did the moving around thing in my 20s whwn I had nothing ro lose. Everyone was telling me I would be throwing my money away by renting. The upside is thatbI pay a lot less per month than I would be if I were renting as I would be paying twice as much to rent an equivalent house. The downside is the below market salary

The other downsides to home ownership are exit costs and inertia.

 

[Meadbh]

My grandmother would really be upset if I were to move but I don't think I would see her any less than I do now, every month or two. She wants everybody near by and got really upset when my cousin almost moved 3 hours away....even though she has plenty if other family in the area.

Why are you so afraid of your grandmother's disapproval? You are an independent adult with a job. This kind of thinking is holding you back. Stand up for yourself.

 

[Barry Darsow]

I have worked in the IT industry for over 30 years. If you are good at what you do, you are very under paid where you are. If I were in your shoes, assuming the job offer is as good as you said it is, I would take it and move. I'd also sell the house you are currently living in.

Your greatest asset is you. While it might be tempting to hang on to the house and rent it out; it can be a lot of headaches, especially if you are so far away. You don't want to be distracted by that at this point. Ask yourself this... if you lived in the other city where your new job is and didn't have a house in the city you currently live in, would you buy one there as a rental property (while living in the new city)? My guess is that is a big fat "No!". It would also allow you to avoid the situation with the family member that wants to rent it from you... never want to get into family things like that because a) they probably want a bargain price; and 2) what are you going to do if they are being a bad tenant or aren't paying you as they should?

Now is the time in your life to maximize your earning potential, and that will just continue to grow if you are in an area with competition for jobs.

All good points. I am underpaid and renting the house would not be in my best interest if I were to move.

I am supposed to give them an answer today. They have given me almost two weeks and I am still not ready to accept or turn them down. Not good.

I wonder if maybe I turn this one down and take a weekend (without distraction) and figure out EXACTLY what I really want to do - whether to ride out the current job as I try to build something on the side....or just move on and figure out exactly which city I want to work in (and live in). Even if I turn this down, there should be offers but I would of course then have to go through the interview process again with other companies.

Is it out of the question to stall them for more time?
They said that I am the only candidate they are considering after the last batch of interviews and would repost the job if I do not accept so there is no 2nd choice.

Perhaps I say that I would like to take a tour of their facility or maybe even take a couple days off of work within the next week or two and offer to shadow his team? I have not met the people I would be working closely with. They could repost the job in the meantime and interview other people.

If both sides are happy with each other after working together for a couple days and I decide to relocate, we move forward. Otherwise we shake hands and part ways. There is that risk they find someone they like better but I am more willing to take that risk than jump into something that I might regret.

 

[Barry Darsow]

The other downsides to home ownership are exit costs and inertia.

Exactly

 

[Barry Darsow]

Why are you so afraid of your grandmother's disapproval? You are an independent adult with a job. This kind of thinking is holding you back. Stand up for yourself.

She is not the deal breaker, was just pointing out the lack of family support for making a move and she is one example. If I were to move, as long as I am still within a few hours, I would not see her or other family members any less than I do now. I don't think they understand that. They want me available in a moment's notice.

 

[Big_Hitter]

cut the cord - change is a necessary part of every living organism

I did it 5 years ago. No regrets.

 

[Meadbh]

She is not the deal breaker, was just pointing out the lack of family support for making a move and she is one example. If I were to move, as long as I am still within a few hours, I would not see her or other family members any less than I do now. I don't think they understand that. They want me available in a moment's notice.

......to do what? Act as their unpaid handyman? Sort out their computer problems? Drive them to medical appointments?

Did your family members pay for your education? Are they paying your mortgage? My guess is no, but they sure did encourage you to buy a house, because they knew it would tie you to the neighbourhood and keep you under their thumb.

Time to grow some cojones, man.