What was your greatest epiphany?

[Music Lover]

Learning the difference between enough and more.

 

[travelover]

My grade 7 teacher taught me to decide what I wanted in my life and act accordingly.

This included not being upset about low subject marks. She said "you have decided how much work you want to put into it". So some subjects of limited interest got less work and less reward. And similarly the ones of interest got more attention.

This carried over into what I chose to excel at in work and devise tactics to minimize the others.

RIP Miss Madden!

Excellent point. For better or worse, teachers are an important influence on our lives and well worth a community's investment to keep good ones.

 

[NoworLater]

About 10 years ago, a guy who was about 15 years older than me on my team said “you know, you have to buy your retirement, you don’t just get it when you’re old”

It really changed my mindset about living on less.

The other was really that the more you buy, the more hassle and expense.

Someone else mentioned wrt work about you never know who is watching you, I’ve got my last 3 promos from this exactly.

 

[Marita40]

1. You can't change people. They have to change themselves.
2. "Just show up" is a game changer.
3. Integrity in all aspects of life = serenity.
4. People show who they really are eventually. Actions do speak louder than words.
5. It is well worth it to buy really good shoes vs. cheap ones.

 

[Music Lover]

I also had an epiphany many years ago when I first heard the term "disposable income". I had a low paying job and started applying it to my situation and would come up with many different scenarios: Well, I have $300 left this month after paying all my bills. I'm basically working for $2 an hour. If I buy something for $15 I have to work all day just to afford it!!

Yes, it was silly and not really accurate or realistic. But it stuck in my head and that made it easier to avoid frivolous purchases.

Right around the same time I had just paid a plumber $160 to fix a leaking pipe. He was there for a little over an hour and I remember thinking that that little bit of time cost me 2 weeks of spending money. That's the day I became interested in DIY. I actually went to the hardware store, bought a few feet of copper pipe, some fittings, solder, a torch, etc., and taught myself how to do basic plumbing repair.

 

[dtbach]

Waking up one morning and looking at a 50+ man in the mirror. Made me realize how fast time goes by and there is nothing you can do to stop or slow it down.

 

[aja8888]

Not the greatest one as I can't really define that, but one very recent one:

At almost 79, I am losing more old friends than I am making new ones anymore.

 

[street]

Not the greatest one as I can't really define that, but one very recent one:

At almost 79, I am losing more old friends than I am making new ones anymore.

True, and I have realized many years ago already, that I have more birthdays behind me than ahead of me.

 

[Keim]

Waking up one morning and looking at a 50+ man in the mirror. Made me realize how fast time goes by and there is nothing you can do to stop or slow it down.

I hope you told him to leave.

 

[aja8888]

True, and I have realized many years ago already, that I have more birthdays behind me than ahead of me.

I have found it's best to not even think about birthdays as I get older.

 

[Music Lover]

True, and I have realized many years ago already, that I have more birthdays behind me than ahead of me.

Middle aged realistically is early to mid 40's but I'm pretty sure most people consider mid 50's to be middle aged.

 

[Dreamer]

A few years into my marriage, I realized that my DH was not purposely doing things to make me mad. I realized that he really did not know how I felt and I needed to verbalize it.

I also realized that being stubborn and trying to prove that I was right, was not a good thing.

I have become a much more mellow and kind person as I have become older (I hope).

 

[Jackietime]

When I was younger, I thought marriage was something that required work to make it last. My parents and both sets of grandparents were married forever.
There didn't seem to be an abundance of happiness in these marriages but the abundance of work was pretty apparent.

After 9 miserable years of marriage, I divorced and after many more years, finally found the love of my life and realized that marriage is not hard work at all IF you marry the right person.

We are celebrating 23 years of marriage - no work required.

 

[NW-Bound]

Middle aged realistically is early to mid 40's but I'm pretty sure most people consider mid 50's to be middle aged.

It's called "being in denial".

Lemme see. If 55 is the middle point, then people expect to live till 110.

Just to get to 100 is tough. The US currently has 97,000 centenarians, out of a population of 326 million.

Hmm... I wonder how recent the above statistics are, given that COVID has not been kind to the elderlies.

PS. The life expectancy of a 55 male is 25.7, and of a 55 female is 29.1, according to a 2021 government publication. That's more like the 2/3 point, not 1/2 point.

 

[CardsFan]

The John Lennon quote "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."

John Lennon may have said it, but a quick Google search shows so many others before him I don't know who originated it.

But, in my experience, it is quite accurate.

 

[Vincenzo Corleone]

I've had a couple of epiphanies later in life. One is too personal to get into here.

The other has to do with forgiveness. Some people say that you should forgive for your own sake, not necessarily for the sake of the forgiven - that forgiveness is healing. I've learned that in some cases it's OK NOT to forgive - that not forgiving in itself can be healing. It's OK to feel anger, hatred and disgust for someone who has tried to break you.

 

[RobbieB]

I had a boss like that once. I found another job -

 

[Vincenzo Corleone]

I had a boss like that once. I found another job -

I wish it were that easy. When it's family, not so easy.

 

[street]

Middle aged realistically is early to mid 40's but I'm pretty sure most people consider mid 50's to be middle aged.

That is so true mid 40's in most cases.

 

[Which Roger]

After 9 miserable years of marriage, I divorced and after many more years, finally found the love of my life and realized that marriage is not hard work at all IF you marry the right person.

Agreed. Been there, done that. In cases like this, all of the hard work comes during the earlier/bad/failed relationships, and that's when you're learning the things you need to know to marry the right person when the right person comes along later in life.

 

[street]

I have found it's best to not even think about birthdays as I get older.

That is true! My birthday was never a huge day for me. I was always thankful for that day but never remember going and celebrating to any extent.

I know that may seem odd because most people I know always celebrate their BD.

 

[Car-Guy]

I also realized that being stubborn and trying to prove that I was right, was not a good thing.

I have become a much more mellow and kind person as I have become older (I hope).

I really need you and my DW to talk...!

PS. The life expectancy of a 55 male is 25.7, and of a 55 female is 29.1, according to a 2021 government publication. That's more like the 2/3 point, not 1/2 point.

Based on that info and my age, I need to increase my WD rate, a lot...

 

[RobbieB]

I wish it were that easy. When it's family, not so easy.

Yeah. Not even close. Bummer dude, I feel for you.

I had a "Leave it to Beaver" childhood and of course, you think everyone did. But as you get out in the world you find out otherwise.

 

[RunningBum]

I was just reading the thread on what are introvert hobbies and it reminded me about how I learned I didn't actually hate people, I was just an introvert.

I remember when I was in my late 20s and read an article that described an introvert vs an extrovert.
An introvert = a person that recharges themselves by spending time alone
an extrovert = a person that recharges themselves by spending time around other people.
Nothing more, nothing less.

This to me was a life game changer. I always wondered why I couldn't be around people even good friends for too long. I always thought there was something wrong with me.

That was one for me too. It helped me accept who I am, and that there was nothing wrong with me, and I didn't have to avoid social outings, I just needed my alone time to recharge.

Another one happened over a couple of years. My college football team lost a very close championship game my senior year. A couple years later the pro team I was always a big fan of won the Super Bowl. I was crushed immediately after the first, and elated after the second, but the next day, I realized nothing really changed. I stopped being a fanatic, and started merely enjoying watching sports and following my teams. That's a lot healthier for me.

 

[MRG]

Some people are idiots and I cannot repair them.

I worked for a guy who I thought was an idiot but questioned myself because he was older and had some money. Later I learned the money was all borrowed and indeed he was a big idiot.