Bad service: What would you do?

[CO-guy]

I don't understand the advice to talk to the manager. CO-guy was traveling and was likely never going to return to this restaurant, no matter what.

Lots of great replies, but I agree that speaking to someone or wasting any more of my time/emotional-energy serves me no purpose. Sure it might be helpful to the restaurant and server to provide feedback, but why does that matter to me?

Also, last year I was staying in a nice downtown hotel while visiting a friend. As an early riser, I had eaten breakfast and was packing up just before 8am when housekeeping ignored the DND sign on the door, knocked and then immediately tried to enter the room. Had it not been for the slide lock and my own loud voice, they would have walked right in. I called the front desk immediately and had the manager meet me in the lobby before departing because it was an obvious safety issue.

 

[jollystomper]

To the OP, I think you did the right thing. I probably would not have waited as long, but that is the only difference. You were polite and did not make a scene.

Even if you are traveling, it can never hurt to talk to the manager, you do not know if there have been other similar complaints and more feedback is better.

No tip is fine - In the rare instances I have done that, I have also left a note on the receipt for my reasons. For me, it is more about their attitude than the service. No restaurant is perfect, and one will run into those situations. When they acknowledge the issue and their mistakes, are apologetic, and strive to make it up in some way, shape or fashion, I will still leave a good tip. When they say nothing or even blame you, I do not see the need to tip.

I would also not hesitate to leave a detailed negative review online - the more better the better folks will accept is as true.

 

[tmm99]

They went through the effort to give you a fresh meal and probably threw the old one away, and after all that, you stiffed the server. I would have tipped at least 20% if they had done that for me. I posted recently that a waitress forgot one of my sides, but she made up for it and then some by giving me two free desserts, so I tipped extra.

If they had done that for you? I mean, she HAD TO bring a fresh burger in this case, right? It wasn't a favour. She didn't make up for anything. She did absolutely the minimum she was required to do. And evidently, the apology wasn't part of the requirement. Giving any tip in this situation would be like giving someone a participation trophy. Enabling bad behaviour with a reward, which is probably worse than giving someone a participation trophy.

 

[Lorenzo]

Sure it might be helpful to the restaurant and server to provide feedback, but why does that matter to me?

Exactly--to be "helpful."

Of course, in the spirit of "no good deed goes unpunished," there is always the possibility a patron's good-faith attempt to "help" a restaurant might not be as well received as the patron might hope.

I do understand the benefit of avoiding "wasting any more of my time/emotional energy," though. If one feels at the moment that they don't have the time and emotional energy to spare to speak with a manager, they shouldn't.

 

[CO-guy]

As an aside to my story, back in the early 2000s I had a friend that was in a position where he was taking groups of clients out for extravagant meals in NYC several times a week, including a large table reservation at a Michelin starred French restaurant 2-3x a month. However, with his doctor's supervision, he had decided to switch to a strict plant-based diet for 90 days. Realizing the issue this could cause, he contacted restaurants in advance and was assured that it would not be a problem by every place he frequented.

On the night of his dinner out with clients at the French restaurant, the server brought his meal out last and pulled off the cloche in front of him to reveal a giant pile of steamed broccoli. Everyone got a good laugh, including him, and he passed around steamed broccoli to those that wanted it before it became apparent that it wasn't a joke and that the plate of broccoli was what the chef had sent out as his dinner. He was able to circulate around the table and so nobody realized that he hadn't actually eaten. The next day he called and made an appointment with the manager. When they met, he reminded the manager that he had been spending $20-30K/month in his restaurant, described what had happened, and explained that he wouldn't be returning.

 

[GenXguy]

On the night of his dinner out with clients at the French restaurant, the server brought his meal out last and pulled off the cloche in front of him to reveal a giant pile of steamed broccoli.

Well, he confirmed plant-based was available in advance, but he still should have been able to order his choice of plant-based meal rather than what the chef might randomly choose to provide him.

 

[GrayHare]

The broccoli thing is odd. Maybe a communications breakdown between staff and chef, some of whom are ESL? I've many times seen restaurants comp expensive meals for the entire table when things have gone wrong, like the soup being spilled on one of the party, or champagne spraying on the group. Sh*t happens everywhere, and if apparently accidental I like to give others the chance to make suitable amends. If that broccoli was intentional, that's a different situation.

 

[MC Rider]

I walk out, never to return.

 

[CO-guy]

If that broccoli was intentional, that's a different situation.

Apparently, it was intentional. The chef was just a jerk. Most other places were incredibly helpful, especially when notified in advance. However, in addition to the health changes from going vegan, his dining experiences over those 90 days definitely changed where he took clients and, more generally, his approach to accommodating the needs of clients.

 

[Koolau]

Apparently, it was intentional. The chef was just a jerk. Most other places were incredibly helpful, especially when notified in advance. However, in addition to the health changes from going vegan, his dining experiences over those 90 days definitely changed where he took clients and, more generally, his approach to accommodating the needs of clients.

If it's true that the chef was a jerk, he certainly didn't share (or care that he shared) in the financial results of the restaurant. Losing a major client because the chef is a jerk would seem something the management would not tolerate - no matter how good the chef is.

 

[CO-guy]

If it's true that the chef was a jerk, he certainly didn't share (or care that he shared) in the financial results of the restaurant. Losing a major client because the chef is a jerk would seem something the management would not tolerate - no matter how good the chef is.

I'm not really sure what the plan was. This was one of my closest friends and, while he played it off in front of his clients, he called me livid the night it happened as well as after meeting with the manager. It was a multi-course meal and, from what I recall, nothing was amiss with the first few courses. So, maybe they thought he would complain and then they would bring out the "real" main, but this was business meeting.

Thankfully, with my recent experience the only thing that happened was my meal got lost and I was forgotten about.

 

[FloridaJim57]

Don't forget to write a save review on Yelp. Also, never wait 45 minutes for your food. You did the right thing regarding the tip by the way. Or at least that is what I would have also done.

 

[CO-guy]

Don't forget to write a save review on Yelp. Also, never wait 45 minutes for your food. You did the right thing regarding the tip by the way. Or at least that is what I would have also done.

Thanks! I really hadn't realized how long it had been until I looked. I messaged my wife, shared a few photos with friends, some wrote back, and then all of a sudden I look around and realize, "Wow! It's been a while."

 

[brett]

Quite some time ago we waited 40 minutes after ordering our food. Asked for the bill for our beverages, paid and walked. I was ready to leave after 30 minutes, spouse wanted to give them more time.

Manager did not seem to care.

We are big believers in voting with our feet and with our wallets.

No service, no tip. Ever. Rewarding people for bad service simply encourages the behaviour.

 

[UpQuark]

Wow this thread actually brought tears to my eyes remembering how horrible my first job experiences were. I remember a 2 penny tip. It was the only tip I got that day, and I was too inexperienced and honest for it to occur to me to not report it as my tips for the day. A forever humiliation, and another nail on the coffin of my confidence. It wound up taking my parents years to get me launched after those initial bad experiences. I remember after being pushed by them to at least get a summer part-time job, I confessed to my mom how incompetent I was.

Eventually I discovered that non-public facing jobs were the ones I could be competent at.

I suspect the majority of servers at restaurants are only doing that job because they don't have the guidance to find different jobs that they have the aptitudes for. And while some people can do anything well, I bet there are some famously awesome people that if given server jobs would not be impressive at all.

 

[Walt34]

No service, no tip. Ever. Rewarding people for bad service simply encourages the behavior.

My understanding is that it is best to leave a penny tip, which I did in a similar situation once. The point of that is to make it clear that you didn't forget the tip, but tipped what the service was worth.

 

[brett]

My understanding is that it is best to leave a penny tip, which I did in a similar situation once. The point of that is to make it clear that you didn't forget the tip, but tipped what the service was worth.

Pennies are no longer valid currency where we live! Nickels may be next.

 

[RetMD21]

... I believe it's the restaurant's job to educate or discipline their servers in the same way as any employer does, not mine through withholding a tip. As I see it, in the US, that 15-20% is simply the portion of the total actual price that's not reflected in the menu price. In the US, it's supposedly optional to pay. In other countries, either the menu price reflects the actual price, or they list a "service" charge on the bill that is not optional.

It's a bad system. Front of house people get tips and back of house get screwed

 

[Koolau]

Wow this thread actually brought tears to my eyes remembering how horrible my first job experiences were. I remember a 2 penny tip. It was the only tip I got that day, and I was too inexperienced and honest for it to occur to me to not report it as my tips for the day. A forever humiliation, and another nail on the coffin of my confidence. It wound up taking my parents years to get me launched after those initial bad experiences. I remember after being pushed by them to at least get a summer part-time job, I confessed to my mom how incompetent I was.

Eventually I discovered that non-public facing jobs were the ones I could be competent at.

I suspect the majority of servers at restaurants are only doing that job because they don't have the guidance to find different jobs that they have the aptitudes for. And while some people can do anything well, I bet there are some famously awesome people that if given server jobs would not be impressive at all.

Our son made a fortune as wait staff. He made so much he eventually went into the restaurant business - which turned out to be problematic! Go figure.

 

[Koolau]

Pennies are no longer valid currency where we live! Nickels may be next.

I know a lot of places round up or down to nickels instead of providing pennies, but I never heard of pennies not being valid anymore. I guess YMMV?

 

[Koolau]

It's a bad system. Front of house people get tips and back of house get screwed

Son thought that too (though he got a decent salary as a cook.) So he moved out front (when he could) and made a fortune as wait staff.

I think it very much depends how good you are at your j*b (a good chef can make good money and so can a wait staff - if they are good.) YMMV

 

[emmaswan]

Son thought that too (though he got a decent salary as a cook.) So he moved out front (when he could) and made a fortune as wait staff.

I think it very much depends how good you are at your j*b (a good chef can make good money and so can a wait staff - if they are good.) YMMV

Would you mind sharing a bit more about your son's experience as wait staff?

 

[CO-guy]

Son thought that too (though he got a decent salary as a cook.) So he moved out front (when he could) and made a fortune as wait staff.

I think it very much depends how good you are at your j*b (a good chef can make good money and so can a wait staff - if they are good.) YMMV

Being a server is awful. Growing up, I had hoped to be a chef and open a restaurant. Once I started serving/bussing/prepping in restaurants, I realized the following:
1) You can make decent money by hustling as a server, but it's terrible (time, hours, soul crushing...)
2) Back of the house is the same but just a different kind of terrible with higher rates of alcoholism.

I would never tip a penny or go out of my way to make things any worse for a server or any service worker. I did try to leave when my food eventually arrived cold from it's long journey around the restaurant, but the server insisted they would remake it. I left nothing because, after losing my food for most of an hour, and still not getting my order right, the server implied that I was a fussy guest.

 

[Koolau]

Would you mind sharing a bit more about your son's experience as wait staff

He w*rked at Dead Lobster as a cook for a while and finally got to become a waiter. This was during DL's heyday and they were always busy. He was a good looking 20 something, tall, skinny, blond, broad smile, gift of gab, etc. The tips just poured in for him. He loved it! The girls (and older ladies) just went ape over him. It helps to be attractive in case no one has noticed.

 

[Badger]

Pennies are no longer valid currency where we live! Nickels may be next.

I don't understand how a penny is no longer valid where you live. It is legal tender that is minted and backed by the Federal Government. If it was no longer valid currency why would pennies continue to be minted? If the state can determine what is a valid currency then couldn't they claim the same for any and all currency? I don't pretend to understand legal issues so I would like to be educated.