AnotherDreamer
Dryer sheet wannabe
- Joined
- Apr 2, 2018
- Messages
- 14
I'd be curious to know what the community thinks of my situation.
My circumstances are as follows. My father passed away a number of years ago, and the only person left on his side of the family is his older brother. My uncle has been fairly well off but his health has been very bad for many years now (he has a number of chronic conditions and is now 87). Initially he had promised my dad he would take care of both my sister and I when he passed away, but my sister moved to another city to pursue her career and started a family of her own. That left me as the sole caretaker for the last decade.
It has been a gruelling decade. I've been working part-time during the school year and full-time in the summers and taking care of my uncle as his health has been in steady decline. I do everything for him, from taking him to all his countless appointments, cleaning his condo, doing his groceries, etc. So far he hasn't really provided me with any financial assistance (other than perhaps paying me the occasional 100$ for cleaning) and I've been living on the bare minimum and at the edge of poverty for the last decade (I'm in my mid 30's). The overall time demands have pretty much crippled my academic dreams and my degree has been taking an inordinate amount of time to complete (I'm still not finished). He's recognized my sacrifice and recently changed his will leaving me everything. Given his current age and health trajectory, he likely won't last very much longer (a couple of years at most), which saddens me, but at the same time, I see how much he has been suffering and in a way his passing will be an end to that constant pain, so it really is for the best.
The inheritance likely would be just enough for me to pay off my student loans and were I to choose to do so, live off the 4% rule at a very modest lifestyle. However, his assets aren't large enough that if I gave a considerable share to my sister, I'd have enough for FIRE.
The inheritance is alluring as it would allow me to take a few years off to enjoy a bit of life. The last years have been so stressful I never had free time to go out or even date. I dream of spending some time with my mother while her health is still good, and then returning to finish my studies at a later point. However, I'm torn as to whether this is just greed taking over my thinking and how perhaps I should share a considerable sum with my sister. Were I given the career opportunity she was, I likely would have followed the same trajectory she did, though I imagine I would have done more to stay in contact with my uncle and would have provided more help to both of us, which she never did.
How should I handle the inheritance? As I get closer to the time my uncle passes away, I can't help but start thinking of these questions. Any thoughts or advice? One benefit to living outside the US is I will have free health care and given that I've lived so frugally for so long, I'm certain I could be responsible and adhere to a 4% WDR.
Thanks in advance for anyone who read and for anyone willing to share their thoughts.
My circumstances are as follows. My father passed away a number of years ago, and the only person left on his side of the family is his older brother. My uncle has been fairly well off but his health has been very bad for many years now (he has a number of chronic conditions and is now 87). Initially he had promised my dad he would take care of both my sister and I when he passed away, but my sister moved to another city to pursue her career and started a family of her own. That left me as the sole caretaker for the last decade.
It has been a gruelling decade. I've been working part-time during the school year and full-time in the summers and taking care of my uncle as his health has been in steady decline. I do everything for him, from taking him to all his countless appointments, cleaning his condo, doing his groceries, etc. So far he hasn't really provided me with any financial assistance (other than perhaps paying me the occasional 100$ for cleaning) and I've been living on the bare minimum and at the edge of poverty for the last decade (I'm in my mid 30's). The overall time demands have pretty much crippled my academic dreams and my degree has been taking an inordinate amount of time to complete (I'm still not finished). He's recognized my sacrifice and recently changed his will leaving me everything. Given his current age and health trajectory, he likely won't last very much longer (a couple of years at most), which saddens me, but at the same time, I see how much he has been suffering and in a way his passing will be an end to that constant pain, so it really is for the best.
The inheritance likely would be just enough for me to pay off my student loans and were I to choose to do so, live off the 4% rule at a very modest lifestyle. However, his assets aren't large enough that if I gave a considerable share to my sister, I'd have enough for FIRE.
The inheritance is alluring as it would allow me to take a few years off to enjoy a bit of life. The last years have been so stressful I never had free time to go out or even date. I dream of spending some time with my mother while her health is still good, and then returning to finish my studies at a later point. However, I'm torn as to whether this is just greed taking over my thinking and how perhaps I should share a considerable sum with my sister. Were I given the career opportunity she was, I likely would have followed the same trajectory she did, though I imagine I would have done more to stay in contact with my uncle and would have provided more help to both of us, which she never did.
How should I handle the inheritance? As I get closer to the time my uncle passes away, I can't help but start thinking of these questions. Any thoughts or advice? One benefit to living outside the US is I will have free health care and given that I've lived so frugally for so long, I'm certain I could be responsible and adhere to a 4% WDR.
Thanks in advance for anyone who read and for anyone willing to share their thoughts.
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