MikeD
Full time employment: Posting here.
Rep. Louise Slaughter's Constituent's Dog
http://images.paraorkut.com/img/funnypics/images/d/dog_with_teeth-13099.jpg
http://images.paraorkut.com/img/funnypics/images/d/dog_with_teeth-13099.jpg
A man rushed into a busy doctor's office and shouted, "Doctor! I think I'm shrinking!"
The doctor calmly responded, "Now, settle down. You'll just have to be a little patient."
So this is this what your financial guy told you when you asked him if he would only charge you his fee if he beat the index?So a man dies to meets St Peter at the gate to heaven.
St Peter asks why he should be admitted.
The man explains that he invented HMO's.
These helped millions of people stay healthy and kept health care costs down.
This was a significant contribution to mankind.
St Peter thinks for a minute then says:
"OK please come in. But you can only stay for three days."
Translated into Texan, "stoopid idjit"...tick sod? I need to git mah Irish book out....
i get on extremely well with the lesbians next door.
They asked me what i would like for my birthday. I was stunned when they gave me a rolex.
It was very nice of them, but i think they misunderstood me when i said, "i wanna watch."
Translated into Texan, "stoopid idjit"
Do you know why they call it “PMS?”
Because “Mad Cow Disease” was taken.
Difference between lie and lay:
"Lay" is what I intend to do to that person I brought home from the bar; "lie" is how I got them home in the first place.
in Hawaii, you could include the lie of a lei in lieu of a lay.
Nobody has to lie to get lei'd in Hawaii... and "Lei Day" is even dedicated to the activity!