I'm bumping this thread, first to say hi, since I haven't been here in a while (mostly busy with school... I have a paper coming out in a couple of months that may become moderately notorious, but it's embargoed for now) and second, to complete the story started by the first post in this thread.
Since July 2010 when I posted this:
- I went back to school (see above)
- I took ER from my job, with a nice payoff; I'm now looking to do a PhD in something esoteric like "philosophy of science"
- My FiL died (heart attack after 8 years of caring daily for MiL)
- My MiL died (the bugs got her, after 8 years of being bedridden)
- My Mom died (massive stroke; it was the way she would have wanted to go, and she knew the risks, having stopped her blood pressure medicine several years earlier because it was seriously messing with her quality of life)
DW and BiL did an awful lot of grieving; I coped with it the way our family has always coped with this kind of thing, i.e., with gritted teeth. Anyway, that process is now at the "no longer getting in the way of daily life" stage and we're ready to move on.
It's taken the best part of a year to sort out the inheritance, despite both wills being ultra-simple (FIL left it all to MIL; MIL left it 50-50 to DW and BiL; my Mom left it 50-50 to me and DS). BiL and DW appointed a specialist company to do the work, about which I was skeptical, but they came recommended (from a newspaper article that highlighted the ripoffs to avoid) and indeed it cost less for them to do MiL's total will than we paid the realtor to sell her house. DS, who lives in the same country as my Mom, did all the procedure herself, with a little help from her DH, and didn't charge a fee to the estate.
Mom left about what I thought she would. In-laws were a revelation; they had a quarter of a million dollars in cash, squirreled away in various accounts. DW is torn between being delighted at what we will receive (most of it is earmarked to help our kids buy houses when the time comes, but there may be a little "fun money") and upset that her parents didn't do more travelling when they could. I ought to point out to her that, unlike us, they weren't big fans of travelling, but I'll keep quiet on that point.
Most people who posted here said "don't count your chickens", and I can honestly say that I didn't. I'm just updating "The Spreadsheet" as the various disbursements come in, and looking at what we'll have in the bank at age 75. The grandkids will probably be able to go to college after all.