Bullwinkle
Recycles dryer sheets
- Joined
- Nov 23, 2020
- Messages
- 61
I was reading "pulling the trigger was tough" https://www.early-retirement.org/forums/f28/pulling-the-trigger-is-tough-109989-5.html and all the posts about "limited time left" and "suddenly health complications" and of course the usual "wish I did it earlier", were making me a bit anxious. I think I could step off right now (2-3% SWR), and yet I stay. The reasons are the usual ones which are well discussed, but also one which seems not so much discussed, which is my wife is not really comfortable with the idea of suddenly no one has a paying job. Y'all are a bad influence
There have been a lot of threads about "how do I know when it's time" and about reassuring yourself (or not!) that enough is enough and it's ok to stop. But of course for those who are not single, or otherwise have dependents, it's never really about yourself. Especially if you are the only earner in the household, it's a different situation in terms of security.
I'm not looking to convince anyone, besides I think hardly anyone gets convinced by some logical argument, especially not on emotional issues... and as many have pointed out, once the numbers are in order, this is a fundamentally emotional question! It's more that we gradually get comfortable with some idea over a period of time and eventually adapt. And of course everyone's situation is unique. Also of course the answer to any couples thing is "talk with your spouse." I know that. We do talk, and will talk more. So, I'm just interested in what others experiences were, when it's the other person who mostly has the qualms. How did it work out? What changed to make it seem more reasonable? From a whole family point of view. Especially if you were wanting to retire earlier than socially sanctioned... a 40ish talking about retirement trips the irresponsible / lazy / midlife crisis alarm in a way that someone in their 60s would not. Or maybe you were the unsure one, and were thinking what's gotten into Dearest Whoever!
Also to be honest I got sort of jealous by all these other people saying how their spouse had to convince *them*, or wanted to keep working but hey second income, or was eagerly counting down the days together, and maybe I just want to hear that I'm not totally alone.
Just to be clear this is in no way some sort of crisis for me, I'm ok going for another year or so. I just start thinking... how long is that "or so"? Exactly why am I doing this? How much harder is pulling the trigger when you're not the only one in the blast radius?
There have been a lot of threads about "how do I know when it's time" and about reassuring yourself (or not!) that enough is enough and it's ok to stop. But of course for those who are not single, or otherwise have dependents, it's never really about yourself. Especially if you are the only earner in the household, it's a different situation in terms of security.
I'm not looking to convince anyone, besides I think hardly anyone gets convinced by some logical argument, especially not on emotional issues... and as many have pointed out, once the numbers are in order, this is a fundamentally emotional question! It's more that we gradually get comfortable with some idea over a period of time and eventually adapt. And of course everyone's situation is unique. Also of course the answer to any couples thing is "talk with your spouse." I know that. We do talk, and will talk more. So, I'm just interested in what others experiences were, when it's the other person who mostly has the qualms. How did it work out? What changed to make it seem more reasonable? From a whole family point of view. Especially if you were wanting to retire earlier than socially sanctioned... a 40ish talking about retirement trips the irresponsible / lazy / midlife crisis alarm in a way that someone in their 60s would not. Or maybe you were the unsure one, and were thinking what's gotten into Dearest Whoever!
Also to be honest I got sort of jealous by all these other people saying how their spouse had to convince *them*, or wanted to keep working but hey second income, or was eagerly counting down the days together, and maybe I just want to hear that I'm not totally alone.
Just to be clear this is in no way some sort of crisis for me, I'm ok going for another year or so. I just start thinking... how long is that "or so"? Exactly why am I doing this? How much harder is pulling the trigger when you're not the only one in the blast radius?